shabbychicprincess 19 Posted December 2, 2012 I confess that I think about food too much and spend hours in bed at night when I'm supposed to be asleep, looking at recipes online . I confess that I hate being near my husband and son now when they eat , because they shovel so much food in their mouths and eat like pigs . I confess that I feel more sexier now and more adventurous but yet it cuts deep when my husband says things to me like " you feel like a shell of a person " . When asked what he meant he said my body was firm before but now I feel squishy . Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
steelergirl 135 Posted December 2, 2012 I had two squares of Hershey's white chocolate.. 1 Almostthere34 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spieldose 14 Posted December 2, 2012 That was strangely therapeutic... So I have more. 1. I get pissed when people that are under 200 lbs have or talk about having weight loss surgery. 2. I get mad at myself for eating more than 600 calories. Day... When I could put back over 5,000 calories without my sleeve. 3. I know the sleeve is working for me, but I get jealous of people on here that lost ridiculous amounts of weight their first month (50+ lbs? I can only hope). 4. I am scared that I will become a b***h and leave my fiancé when I'm skinny if he's still overweight... 5. I am scared that when I have babies I will gain all my weight back and I will be fat for the rest of my life. Sent from my iPhone using VST Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OneWritersSoul 353 Posted December 2, 2012 I confess that I thought this would be a good thing but in fact, it has turned my life upside down. Other than online and at the surgeon's office, no one gets it. I confess that I'm feeling completely unhinged. Mental. Crazy cakes. Ask my husband who, after an intense argument, just told me he feels as if our entire relationship is hopeless- because I genuinely can't see -any- change in my body. He can't do crazy. I don't blame him- I don't want to do it either. I'd rather have him happy without me than miserable with me. I confess that people who are motivated to exercise (hardcore) both anger and astound me. Then I feel worse about the walking I do every day. It's not what they're doing, so why bother? So I put it off until I feel guilty as sin. Then I push myself until I'm sick. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. I confess that my honest sharing online has inadvertently led to people feeling like they are less than I am. I cry about it. I feel so guilty that I don't want to post, because I -never- want to make -anyone- feel less than wonderful. (This was scary, but I promised my therapist I'd keep participating. So, I'm sorry if I've angered or offended anyone in the process.) 3 Velena, Jessielynn and Ms skinniness reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fyre_storm 1,412 Posted December 2, 2012 I'm afraid of complications and worry all day/night 4.5 weeks out. I'm afraid I'm losing weight too fast. I've lost 30 lbs in 4.5 weeks. I'm terrified my partner will leave me when I get skinny. I can't wait to be skinny so I can have more job Opportunities. I can not wait for ppls reactions when I show up to my reunion skinny. I have made it a goal not to post pictures or have pictures of me up on Facebook till then. 2 ebonymorton and shabbychicprincess reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spieldose 14 Posted December 2, 2012 I confess that I thought this would be a good thing but in fact' date=' it has turned my life upside down. Other than online and at the surgeon's office, no one gets it. I confess that I'm feeling completely unhinged. Mental. Crazy cakes. Ask my husband who, after an intense argument, just told me he feels as if our entire relationship is hopeless- because I genuinely can't see -any- change in my body. He can't do crazy. I don't blame him- I don't want to do it either. I'd rather have him happy without me than miserable with me. I confess that people who are motivated to exercise (hardcore) both anger and astound me. Then I feel worse about the walking I do every day. It's not what they're doing, so why bother? So I put it off until I feel guilty as sin. Then I push myself until I'm sick. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. I confess that my honest sharing online has inadvertently led to people feeling like they are less than I am. I cry about it. I feel so guilty that I don't want to post, because I -never- want to make -anyone- feel less than wonderful. (This was scary, but I promised my therapist I'd keep participating. So, I'm sorry if I've angered or offended anyone in the process.)[/quote'] I'm sorry you can't see any change in your body. It's because you've seen yourself every single day and in your mind, you look the same. I promise you other people definitely see the change. Maybe you won't see it until you're near goal... Who knows? The scale tells the truth though. And please never stop posting. I enjoy everything you have to say. Sent from my iPhone using VST 1 mel2643 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spieldose 14 Posted December 2, 2012 I'm afraid of complications and worry all day/night 4.5 weeks out. I'm afraid I'm losing weight too fast. I've lost 30 lbs in 4.5 weeks. I'm terrified my partner will leave me when I get skinny. I can't wait to be skinny so I can have more job Opportunities. I can not wait for ppls reactions when I show up to my reunion skinny. I have made it a goal not to post pictures or have pictures of me up on Facebook till then. Your partner would be crazy not to like you thin. From your profile pic, you are adorable Now... You will be super hot after! Sent from my iPhone using VST 1 fyre_storm reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Velena 122 Posted December 2, 2012 I confess that at 3 months out, I still eat too much. So much that I threw up again yesterday from eating too much too fast. That makes me feel like a failure. I ate a sliver of birthday cake at work and it went down good! I can't visualize myself thin either. I'm supposed to loose another 60 lbs to reach my "goal" and I can't even imagine what the will look like or feel like I'm thankful for this forum because there is no where else in my life where people would understand what I'm going through. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ms skinniness 3,003 Posted December 2, 2012 I confess that I thought this would be a good thing but in fact, it has turned my life upside down. Other than online and at the surgeon's office, no one gets it. I confess that I'm feeling completely unhinged. Mental. Crazy cakes. Ask my husband who, after an intense argument, just told me he feels as if our entire relationship is hopeless- because I genuinely can't see -any- change in my body. He can't do crazy. I don't blame him- I don't want to do it either. I'd rather have him happy without me than miserable with me. I confess that people who are motivated to exercise (hardcore) both anger and astound me. Then I feel worse about the walking I do every day. It's not what they're doing, so why bother? So I put it off until I feel guilty as sin. Then I push myself until I'm sick. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. I confess that my honest sharing online has inadvertently led to people feeling like they are less than I am. I cry about it. I feel so guilty that I don't want to post, because I -never- want to make -anyone- feel less than wonderful. (This was scary, but I promised my therapist I'd keep participating. So, I'm sorry if I've angered or offended anyone in the process.) I so love that you posted this! I just want to let you know that you are now responsible for how takes what they read. It's their stuff that gets in their way. I love how you take responsibility for your part. Keep it up....Oh and btw, keep posting.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sunshine121276 9 Posted December 2, 2012 1. I confess food is on my mind ALL day long. Good and bad. 2. I confess I weigh myself once, sometimes twice a day. 3. I confess having a piece of chocolate scares the crap outta me for fear of spiralling out of control. 4. I confess that exercise bores me and I wish I was someone who loves it. 5. I confess I resent cooking for my family sometimes when I don't get to indulge. 6. I confess that getting rid of my largest clothes this week gave me major anxiety. 7. I confess that at least once a day I feel this surgery option will be a failure like every other time I've lost weight. 8. I confess that I worry that my wonderful supportive husband won't enjoy my smaller sagging body when I get there. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
azrrel herrejon 10 Posted December 2, 2012 1. I confess that I think about food way more than I should. 2. I confess that I drink caffeinated coffee on occasion 3. I confess that I have sucked on a tiny peice of chocolate and let it melt in my mouth because I'm on soft foods 4. I confes that I have cried until I can't cry anymore about how much I miss my old eating habits 5. I confess that I secretly am angry when my husband eats a big plate of carbs and fat.... Awww sweets , I had the same experience in grieving my old habits when I had my lap band , it's hard very hard no one knows until they live it ! Stay strong you will get threw it I promise it's a mind F... Sorry but true , I just had the sleeve and even tho I have those feelings I know I'll make it threw and when I get there ill be able to have my old friends just not stuff myself . Trust me u get over it because u dnt deprive yourself u just learn to minimize and Enjoy and respect it more ! I hope this help look me up ill help u threw it !!! Sleeved 11/26/12 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
azrrel herrejon 10 Posted December 2, 2012 hello my name is Jason and Im an alchoholic' date=' no wait. wrong web site, yes I lust for the baconader at wendy and a giant Dr Pepper and snickers and fried fish and popcorn ect. but PEOPLE that is the food that made our jea ns tight and our t shirts tight and underwear tight and I can only speak for myself, but I refuse to go back to that.[/quote'] Amen exactly what motivated me daily !!!!!! I said hecK NO I refuSE!!!!!???????????????????????????? 1 Velena reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
azrrel herrejon 10 Posted December 2, 2012 ????I confess - I'm as envious about skinny people as I am of those who can engorge themselves when eating . - that I'm my worst enemy , I hate myself no matter what , people will say " u look great, pretty , sexy , etc " I dnt see it . When I take pictures it's like it's not me I'm looking at . - that I wish I could have a day a month where I can just eat tell I can eat no more !!!! - that even tho all my issues I wouldn't go back to being 224 if I had the choice ! - that no one knows the struggle of a weight loss surgery than those who have been threw it , I hat when I hear well you took the easy way out !! EASY???? Wtf?!!! Makes me angry this ish is not easy it F... With mind body and soul! - that I'm crave a New York steak , moscato , Malibu pineapple drink , Chines food , a good coors , etc lol - that I'm sick of relying on others I'm a go get my ish done and having to walk slow and ask for this or that pisses me off! But it's a learning process and humbling too WOW that felt great I can go on but ill write a book lol ! Thnk u guys for reading ???????? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grayeybeauty 48 Posted December 2, 2012 I confess that after reading everyone's post I want hug all of you and cry because I've felt the sane way at one point. I confess that I wish I had never done this everyday my first month and u cry myself to sleep.< /p> I confess that did this for the man I thought I would spend the rest of my life with only to have him tell me he needs time to get his **** together afterwards. I confess that I can't wait to see my ex and his new wife face this Xmas..not that she is pretty just thin. I also confess that my sex drive is through the roof and now I'm flipping single.. I confess that I don't always eat or eat right or exercise like I should. I confess that I love the look on people faces when I walk in a room. I'm sorry I went on a rant but it felt good!! 3 ebonymorton, BigBootyQT and Velena reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JanaLee 24 Posted December 2, 2012 Love this thread because my confessions are like many... Confession 1... My biggest fear is that I did this surgery for nothing....I won't achieve my goal weight. Confession 2....I compare my weight loss to others on here & I usually feel like a failure. I'm 19 lbs down since Nov. 6 & experiencing my first stall while many others are down so much more. Confession 3... It's very hard to get all my Water & Protein in which is probably the reason for my stall. Confession 4.... I've never been skinny in my adult life, and I'm very excited! Confession 5....I wish the next year would hurry up so I could see my progress.... I know that my fears were silly. 2 Velena and ebonymorton reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites