funnyfarm319 3 Posted August 3, 2012 I'm pre-op, have to wait till 8/31. I only have a few close friends and just like me they are fat, we eat together, we play together, then we eat again. One of the friends if very supportive, even to the point that she is looking into surgery herself. The other has looked into it but because her PCP refused to support her she abandoned the idea. the later is really worrying me. In the last few weeks, she has almost stopped calling and doesn't return calls for days. We have been friends for more than 20 years (all fat) and i don't want to loose that. All her words are supportive, but her actions are not. Can i fix this before it gets any worse? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gigimamma 11 Posted August 3, 2012 I am begining to lose girl friends because of my weight loss' date=' they don't even know about the surgery they think I am on a diet and working out (didn't feel too comfortable telling them). They always want to go out and eat and I always give an excuse bc I cant go out and eat yet and their response is "I forgot your skinny mini now". It makes me so upset. All my family is in NYC and I'm out here in Jersey and now I have no one to hang out with. I guess I learned who my real friends are.[/quote'] Where in jersey are ya at? I'm In ocean county Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AnewG2012 12 Posted August 3, 2012 I'm in Princeton not too far from Trenton. Where's Ocean County? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
colebort 18 Posted August 3, 2012 Michelle I am in Princeton' date=' NJ. where in SJ are you?[/quote'] Who did your procedure? I had doctor Chau who is located in princeton nj Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amanda 3.0 140 Posted August 3, 2012 I have stopped hearing from at least one friend. Some of my friends have had WLS and I think they were okay as long as they were in an "advisory" position. But now that I have surpassed most of my friends, I don't hear from them so much. Be fat really is also being part of a club. Now on the other hand, I don't know if I've offended her without knowing, that is always possible. And there is all the political division going on right now too, that strains friendships. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AnewG2012 12 Posted August 3, 2012 Who did your procedure? I had doctor Chau who is located in princeton nj Dr.Lisa Dobruskin in Hamilton. Love her! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
M_Johnson 43 Posted August 3, 2012 I am in Sewell. Michelle xo Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gigimamma 11 Posted August 5, 2012 I'm in Princeton not too far from Trenton. Where's Ocean County? Ocean county is where seaside is located I'm about 20 mon south of there Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tonya9969 38 Posted August 5, 2012 I've never really had "friends" just a gang of cousins n my brother n sister... Thank God they are supporting me... At first they were worried about me having surgery n begged my to try some other WL method, but now we are all good. I couldn't imagine losing friends over improving myself... That must be really hurtful... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkinnyOnMe 81 Posted August 5, 2012 Umm... what's wrong with the woman talking about being on Weight Watchers? Perhaps she wants to show people that healthy is an option and fatty foods shouldn't be apart of a regular routine. I talk about dieting and exercise A LOT at work and I do it to be encouraging not obnoxious. And frankly if people who are overweght (and I'm still one of them) are offended maybe they should look at themselves instead of putting th blame on someone else Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DivaK 55 Posted August 5, 2012 I don't have many friends either but I haven't told anyone about the surgery so we will see as time goes on if they start to act negative towards me. The only one who knows about the surgery is my husband and he is very supportive. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
StrangelyNormal 182 Posted August 5, 2012 You're not the fat friend any more. Ur "competition" Sad but true Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fluffylibra30 323 Posted August 5, 2012 I had always been the fat friend so I didn't lose any friends. But I joined a gym when I started on the WLS in preparation of afterwards. And I have made some amazing friends! They are all healthy fun people. We work out together almost every day, have dinner, hang out at the pool all the fun stuff girls do together. It's sad when you lose friends, but usually you are friends with people whom you have things in common, they might feel as if you have nothing in common anymore. hopefully you will be able to find some new great friends if your old friends never come around. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SV2 57 Posted August 5, 2012 Umm... what's wrong with the woman talking about being on Weight Watchers? Perhaps she wants to show people that healthy is an option and fatty foods shouldn't be apart of a regular routine. I talk about dieting and exercise A LOT at work and I do it to be encouraging not obnoxious. And frankly if people who are overweght (and I'm still one of them) are offended maybe they should look at themselves instead of putting th blame on someone else You don't see her behavior as passive-aggressive against the other women? Sent from my iPad using VST 2 LaBelle509 and gustavo52974 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gustavo52974 369 Posted August 6, 2012 You don't see her behavior as passive-aggressive against the other women? Sent from my iPad using VST I was mortified by her behavior. Passive-aggressive, catty, mean-spirited, unprofessional, un-classy, un-ladylike...call it what you will but fair is fair: she didn't say it to be informative--no one asked her opinion. She did it to make herself seem better than the other women. And they hate her because of it. It was an object lesson of how not to treat others. Her behavior WAS obnoxious, and my opinion of her dropped. 2 LaBelle509 and nurse05 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites