The Fine Line Between Acceptance And Making Excuses

[Supersweetums 1,164]

I would like to conquer the notion/language involved believing that the food is a "treat" in the first place. Why do we call it that? Why do we feel that a piece of food is a reward or gift in some way? After a hard day, why not "treat" ourselves with a cost-equivalent non-edible reward? oh, psychology!

True! It is burned into my brain!!

[O.T.R. sleever 3,386]

I would like to conquer the notion/language involved believing that the food is a "treat" in the first place. Why do we call it that? Why do we feel that a piece of food is a reward or gift in some way? After a hard day' date=' why not "treat" ourselves with a cost-equivalent non-edible reward? oh, psychology! [/quote']

Very interesting, but what else would you label foods like Hagen Däs, Giradeli, Cheesecake Factory? These are a few things that I just can't see eliminating long term. But even when I do reintroduce them , it can't be with any real regularity.

[Globetrotter 1,340]

I would call those foods dessert, sweets. Basically, what they are. I just wonder why we tend to associate high caloric, low nutrition, basically poisonous foods with "treating yourself", it's illogical. It must be from the thousands of years of human living - prior to the last 65 years - when the only time you got your hands on a high calorie rich food was during special festivities and holydays, when the really were treats and only happened ahandful of times per year, not every dang day :/

[JenniJune 79]

1) I think your meal plan for today sounds perfect.

2) My family and I are trying to modify our diet to whole-foods without added chemicals (which is NOT easy in our little town!!) So I tend to use real (raw) sugar, honey, agave, etc. I do use Splenda for some things (I can't stomach stevia), but rarely. But I also limit the things I use with real sugar. I do use low fat dairy products, but I read labels. I do abide by the moderation law, though. I eat clean 98% of the time, but if I want something I allow a bite or two.

[O.T.R. sleever 3,386]

I think you are absolutely right on how they got he label, however, in reality, it seems that we have changed the idea of how we view Desserts/treats. For example when I met my wife, she was raised that Desserts were just a part of every meal. That seemed completely foreign to me, my mother did a lot of baking when I was young, but not really what would consider dessert. It was more like zucchini bread, banana bread. It wasn't till I got a bot older and was making a good living that I felt I deserved the "higher quality treats" and with them being so readily available and somewhat affordable I indulged all to often. I mean, heck,I bought Hagen Däs bars at Sams Club & my wife can put Cheesecake Factory to shame. Now, how did I get to where I am?

[notime 340]

What's the point of having the sleeve if we don't change our diets to make the most of it? We go into this with the knowledge of how to eat a healthy diet and should stick with it. We have been told and tell others that it is a tool. Let's treat it like the tool it is and implement the healthy eating part, which is the main part of the plan. Going off the plan is an invitation to lack of progress or actually gaining weight. I tell myself, "Never again will I be overweight." and I hope to continue acting in a manner that will ensure it. When I get tempted, I pull out a picture of me at my highest weight and it gives me support in my decision not to eat "bad stuff." I am only three and a half months out, but have resisted temptation and hope to continue resisting it. I'm sorry if I come across as though I think I am a saint, but this is my plan and I am sticking to it.

[Globetrotter 1,340]

Frankly, notime, it does come off as a saint - but I'm not going to hold that against you lol! We all sounded that way at 3 months out, we simply "cannot understand" how anyone would not "implement the healthy eating part" and my goodness our sanctity! I know I was one of them, because at 3 months out, you are in the golden zone of the honeymoon, all bad desires have been magically erased, you are waking up to a glorious world where you feel so powerful over your body and your mind, you are riding on an awesome high - not to mention the fact that the weight is jus flying off you right now, which really helps reinforce the good behavior.

However, that is temporary. I sounded just as righteous as you, back then, but now - even though I still have the incredible tool - it's kinda like the confidence a supermodel had when she was 20 ... and even though she is the same gorgeous creature, at 40 it's a different game. Well, at 2 years out, it's a different game.

So, take advantage of that honeymoon! Eat as pure as pure can be! Get to goal as soon as possible, get under goal as soon as possible, so that you have a cushion for when life gets complicated again.

[notime 340]

Good response!

[Supersweetums 1,164]

Frankly, notime, it does come off as a saint - but I'm not going to hold that against you lol! We all sounded that way at 3 months out, we simply "cannot understand" how anyone would not "implement the healthy eating part" and my goodness our sanctity! I know I was one of them, because at 3 months out, you are in the golden zone of the honeymoon, all bad desires have been magically erased, you are waking up to a glorious world where you feel so powerful over your body and your mind, you are riding on an awesome high - not to mention the fact that the weight is jus flying off you right now, which really helps reinforce the good behavior.

However, that is temporary. I sounded just as righteous as you, back then, but now - even though I still have the incredible tool - it's kinda like the confidence a supermodel had when she was 20 ... and even though she is the same gorgeous creature, at 40 it's a different game. Well, at 2 years out, it's a different game.

So, take advantage of that honeymoon! Eat as pure as pure can be! Get to goal as soon as possible, get under goal as soon as possible, so that you have a cushion for when life gets complicated again.

I couldn't agree more! Very well said and well responded. I am almost 2 years post op, and it is a lot different now than then. For the first 6 months of being sleeved, I was very diligent and followed my plan which helped me learn new behaviors and a new outlook on food. And to say that I have not adopted a healthy lifestyle because I sometimes eat ice cream or chocolate is uninformed and really a little judgemental. Like I said, I have changed the way I eat and what I eat. I eat very healthy most of the time, but if I want an ice cream cone, I eat it and not feel guilty or shameful because of it. I do agree with people that make no changes, still eat the french fries and ice cream everyday and say, well, I can only eat a couple. Well, I'll tell you right now, 1 year post op, or 2 years post op, you will be able to eat way more and you will find your weight most likely creeping back on. I have said it numerous times, it is a tool that you need to learn to work with or you will continue to struggle with your weight.

I am truly at a place where I can say that I am happy. I eat a diet that I enjoy and can easily maintain. Maybe it is not for everyone, but I have managed to lose 85lbs post-op and 125lbs from my highest weight, I am below my goal weight and I am still losing 20 months out, so I think I am doing just fine and enjoying the occasional ice cream cone or small bag of chips at the same time.

[notime 340]

It sounds as though you have been able to beat the carb addiction so many of us had pre-op. Congratulations!

[Globetrotter 1,340]

I don't know if I have actually beat the carb and sugar addictions, or if I am masking them with all of my exercise and tiny portions, I genuinely desire this post-op healthful lifestyle and don't want to find out that I've been lying to myself.

Today's food: tea with milk, sauteed chicken kebab, some kind of salad w Protein, probably a fresh peach. and a donut. I'm sorry.

[Supersweetums 1,164]

I don't know if I have actually beat the carb and sugar addictions, or if I am masking them with all of my exercise and tiny portions, I genuinely desire this post-op healthful lifestyle and don't want to find out that I've been lying to myself.

Today's food: tea with milk, sauteed chicken kebab, some kind of salad w Protein, probably a fresh peach. and a donut. I'm sorry.

You are too funny...I love the little tiny font! The problem, like you have said, is to overcome the mental game of it. Why should we apologize for eating a donut every once in a while. I do it! We have Tim Horton's here in Canada and they have Timbits (donut holes). The once every 3 weeks to month that we have them, I usually have 4-6...you heard right, 4-6! I am full afterward, but I enjoyed them. Whether or not you feel like it is becoming a problem is really up to you, and not for any of us to judge.

[notime 340]

You are too funny...I love the little tiny font! The problem, like you have said, is to overcome the mental game of it. Why should we apologize for eating a donut every once in a while. I do it! We have Tim Horton's here in Canada and they have Timbits (donut holes). The once every 3 weeks to month that we have them, I usually have 4-6...you heard right, 4-6! I am full afterward, but I enjoyed them. Whether or not you feel like it is becoming a problem is really up to you, and not for any of us to judge.

Yes, but when someone with a chocolate problem asks if it is all right to have a "small piece" of chocolate, my answer would be no every time. Yes, it is judgmental, but she asked for a judgement.

[Supersweetums 1,164]

Yes, but when someone with a chocolate problem asks if it is all right to have a "small piece" of chocolate, my answer would be no every time. Yes, it is judgmental, but she asked for a judgement.

We are own worst judges and critics and have spent years being judged by others. I have been yelled and called names while walking down the street. I know what I am doing right and wrong, and so does everyone else. I am not here to tell people that they are a bad person for eating something unhealthy. I am here to encourage them to make a better choice next time and not berate themselves. Shame and guilt is part of the reason so many of us have gotten to this point, that we were bad for eating ice cream, we should know better than to have a piece of chocolate, that we failed because we had a piece of cake. Someone might ask for help, they might ask for an opinion, but I really believe that no one asks to be judged.

[LindaS 316]

There are some tasty chocolate-flavored Protein bars out there!

I am right there with you, Globetrotter. I haven't lost very much since February (less than 10 pounds) and most of that came off during two weeks time.

I can eat wonderfully and exercise daily burning hundreds of calories and not lose a single pound.

I can eat some carbs and drink some alcohol and not gain anything.

And then for no reason, when my eating and exercise is great, I gain weight. And then I lose it even though there is no reason. And I can't figure out why.

It doesn't make sense. The 3500 calores = 1 pound is not accurate for me.

And when I don't get rewarded or punished, I tend to make bad choices (popcorn!).

I suspect some of it might be due to monthly cycle stuff although I no longer technically have a monthly cycle. I had an endometrial ablation, so I don't get a period, but I think I still get the hormone influx, but I can no longer track it to that.

I think part of it is that I am down to the harder to burn stuff. And it is in my problem areas (upper thighs/butt/belly), which are harder places to tone/exercise.

I definitely have some psychological stuff. I tend to eat popcorn when I'm alone and working. I like salty/crunchy Snacks better than I like chocolate/sweet Snacks. I tried Protein chips instead of regular chips, but I don't like the flavor. At first, they were a good substitute for the crunch craving, but they taste so bad, I'd rather have 100 calories of actual chips than something that tastes bad but is better for me. I could get the crunch from raw veggies, which is actually my preference except I have braces, which makes eating raw veggies hard to do.

I log my food daily, and I think that is a big part of me keeping on track usually. I am even thinking of doing a day or two of photographing what I eat just to see if it will help me make better choices. I have a blog, and if I had to photograph it would I be willing to eat it?

Personally, I think the biggest down fall for me is the calories in drinks. I don't know a lot of calories in drinks, and they tend to surprise me more than anything. Summer drinks tend to be higher in calorie (like lemonade). I had a Gatorade the other day and didn't realize until after I had drank it that it had 39 grams of carbs in it.