To Tell Or Not To Tell....

[echowits 8]

I told my husband, but do not plan to tell anyone else. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what to tell my boss. So far, I'm going with - I'll be out for a few days because I am having elective surgery for a minor medical issue. If pushed, I will say it is of a personal nature. Thoughts?

Omar from Dr. Kelly's office just called me and was giving me pre-surgery instructions. My son overheard and asked - "Your having surgery? When were you going to tell me?" He's not great a keeping secrets, so I told him I just told him I was having surgery on my stomach. He kept pushing so I said the doctor was going to remove some things (non cancerous in nature). He kept pushing - so I said like cists and I added that they may be the cause of my weight gain. He's 15, so he was kidding around and said, "Eww. You have pimples in your stomach?" Oh well, I'm not sure if him telling people I have pimples in my stomach is that is much better than just telling people about the WLS

[O.T.R. sleever 3,386]

I told my husband' date=' but do not plan to tell anyone else. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what to tell my boss. So far, I'm going with - I'll be out for a few days because I am having elective surgery for a minor medical issue. If pushed, I will say it is of a personal nature. Thoughts?

[/quote']

My thoughts, if your boss has any concern for his/her team they will likely assume the worst when you appear secretive. Also I think you might be setting yourself up for the office rumor mill by hiding reality.

[echowits 8]

My thoughts, if your boss has any concern for his/her team they will likely assume the worst when you appear secretive. Also I think you might be setting yourself up for the office rumor mill by hiding reality.

Thanks OTR. My boss is the CEO of the company, and I don't think he will really understand (or that it is his business). I think he will question my judgement, which I cannot have. If needed, I think I'll just say it is a female issue since most of the people I directly work with are men. I'm the only women that directly reports to him.

[loveoften 18]

Thanks OTR. My boss is the CEO of the company, and I don't think he will really understand (or that it is his business). I think he will question my judgement, which I cannot have. If needed, I think I'll just say it is a female issue since most of the people I directly work with are men. I'm the only women that directly reports to him.

Echowits... I see Omar and Dr. Kelly in 4 days!! Good luck with everything and remember it's your body and your choice. I think your son will be too embarrassed to mention anything to anyone! Thank goodness my boys are 8 and 9 and think I am already a size "one".... if they only knew!!!!

Katrina

[KristiP 51]

I'm not telling anyone I don't HAVE to tell. For one, it's nobody else's business. Two, I dont feel like getting unsolicited and incorrect "advice". Three, I don't want it to be implied that I'm weak, that I'm cheating, that I'm lazy. I already has enough negative self talk in my head to deal with....I don't need anyone adding to it. And four, I don't want the unreasonable expectations that people may put on me. Because most people wont know anything about it and in their minds WLS = getting skinny almost overnight. Not everyone will lose 80% of their excess weight in a year. Were all different. My own expectations are enough to deal with.

My husband of course knows. My sister knows; she's in the same boat as me with the band. It goes without saying that shell tell my mom who will be fine. My sister knows not to tell my dad (patents long time divorced). He will not be a supporter. And that's it. I only tell people I trust implicitly and those who know me know that breaking my confidence once means you never get a second chance to do it! Plus I all but write you out of my life. I don't ask for much from people just honesty and trustworthiness.

But, it is a very personal decision, and I think it's great if people feel alright with others knowing.it doesn't invalidate how I feel about it.

[Lloydthumper 70]

I decided to tell everyone because it doesn't bother me if someone talks about me there just giving someone else a break. Plus when telling someone I tell them if they think it's the easy way out. I want them to follow the the pre op and post diets with me then know there purposely going to basically eat a fraction of what most people eat for the rest of there life. Go through the surgury and healing and still have to put forth an effort to lose weight even after the surgury and last but not least have to work and pay for it myself. I really don't think it's the easy way out. Plus I Figuare everyone would find out sooner or later anyway.

[ladiJ 83]

well I am just at the start of my journey, finishing up insurance requirements etc before meeting with surgeon. I had debated wether I wanted to share the info with

anyone or not. I believe my fear that people would believe I took the easy way out, or be disappointed or unsupportive was actually due to my own previous notions on the topic.

Until I learned about the surgery, about the life style changes etc ..I too thought it was unnecessary and the easy way out.

While I do not feel I owe anyone explanations I know if I get the surgery I will be upfront with any and all, not for them, but for me. It helps me to explain what a life style change is needed, how it is a tool not a cure.

We have a saying in my line of work

Your only as sick as your deepest secret. This isn't one I want to be tortured over.

[GreginMI 76]

A friend of mine just went to see my surgeon after seeing my results. That's the kind of reason I've been telling people.