grammyto2 8 Posted July 5, 2012 IMHO all genders want to feel loved, beautiful, and special, regardless off their weight, height, religion, etc... But for some reason there is always that one particular person (or more) whom feels it's their responsibility to announce to others any and every fault you may have, and it hurts!!! I'm so humiliated every time this person says "sing, cuz we know it ain't over till the fat lady sings," refering to me! I've told him this is mean and hurtful and that I don't address the many flaws I feel he has...btw he is a co-worker/"friend"! I know he's only joking, but I am obese, (hate that truth), and it makes me extremely self conscious and I want to hide, if not for the need to earn money here I'd never leave my abode ever!! I'm overly sensitive, and yes I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve! Hopefully within the next several months I'll being wearing a sleeve internally instead, and I'll grow that "THICK" skin he says I need!! I know that its ridiculous for a woman in her late 40's to allow this to affect me, but the fact is that it does and that's That! I posted here because I plan on having surgery in Mexico if all works out. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Southern Oregon 30 Posted July 5, 2012 that is not a "friend"...that is making fun of you and getting to feel better about himself at your expense. AND, it is probably creating a hostile work environment, so you should tell your supervisor. Shame on him. Don't need "thick" skin need to have him not be "thick" headed. 3 Webchickadee, 2bsmallagain and pkehrer reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grammyto2 8 Posted July 5, 2012 Thank you SO.... if it weren't for the fact of drawing even more attention to myself by making charges I'd do so, but I work in a male dominated factory (like 13 women to 135 men), and I've been down that stream before to end up on the bottom and being ridiculed by the others for doing so...its as bad as being the singer! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
danyelleb 386 Posted July 5, 2012 He's an ASS. U don't need to change anything or grow thick skin. I'm sorry that u have to deal with that. Why can't people act like nice human beings?? Sheesh. 1 2bsmallagain reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
2bsmallagain 156 Posted July 5, 2012 Does this man know you are having the surgery? If not I would not tell him simply because when he sees you losing weight he will make light of the situation by making "jokes" about that too. This surgery is hard enough without negativity from so called friends. I agrees with Southern Oregon he is no friend at all. He is an A@#. You need positive people to help you with what you are going to go through not negative idiots. I wish you all the luck and you need to regroup and stay away from him so you can stay positive for the journey ahead of you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Southern Oregon 30 Posted July 5, 2012 I think you need to tell HR then. Hostile work environment lawsuits could cost them a bunch of money.....they would make him stop. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
angelakay2 117 Posted July 5, 2012 I understand the male dominated situation. The next time he makes a comment like that simply smile and say, "So when will your mom be here to sing?". I know it seems juvenile but it will shut him up out of shock that you can be just as much of a smart a*&! 1 Meli01 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grammyto2 8 Posted July 5, 2012 He's an ASS. U don't need to change anything or grow thick skin. I'm sorry that u have to deal with that. Why can't people act like nice human beings?? Sheesh. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grammyto2 8 Posted July 5, 2012 I agree he's an Ass, and I too wonder why people are so cruel! Thanks Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Territravel 217 Posted July 6, 2012 Friends should lift you up, not bring you down! Truth is this person is not your friend. It's different if he was concerned for you health, but that's not what it sounds like to me. Surround yourself with people who love and encourage you daily! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grammyto2 8 Posted July 6, 2012 No, only one person at work is aware of my plans for surgery, and that's exactly the way I intend on keeping it. Thank you for being kind! HR, and Mgt, are the very ones that unfortunately perpetuate this kind of behavior here I'm in a "man's world" literally! And no, not all men behave like this, just the majority of the ones that work here. I appreciate your concern and ideas, but they will only cause my job to be more difficult daily. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grammyto2 8 Posted July 6, 2012 From experience I can say its extremely difficult to prove what happens at work, because everyone's afraid to speak the truth in fear of retaliation....and although its illegal it happens just the same. I'm fortunate to have wonderful adult children, grandkids, a boyfriend, siblings and parents to support me when I'm down! Thanks for input. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kimbernada 190 Posted July 6, 2012 Next time he says something, start patting your pockets or digging in your purse. If he asks what you are doing, tell him you are looking for a condom because he's obviously a d*ckhead. Seriously, that is harassment. Your HR department should be contacted. Period. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
StrangelyNormal 182 Posted July 6, 2012 What a ******! Personally I wish I was there BC is have slapped the **** out of him Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grammyto2 8 Posted July 6, 2012 As far as being as smart assed as he is back to him, its not my way of being....although there has been many times here that the frustration and anger almost brought me down to the level of the Knuckleheads! I've learned long ago to not be them and that's one thing they won't get! I wonder if they act like this around their daughters and wives? Hmm Share this post Link to post Share on other sites