Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Just Approved! And Scared As Hell ....



Recommended Posts

So, I started the pre-screening process in August of last year. I picked a great facility with a full staff of surgeons, dieticians and psychologists, but I took my time with it because I didn't hadn't made up my mind yet about whether or not I wanted the surgery. Well, I just got my letter yesterday that I was approved by the insurance company, but the only problem is, I STILL haven’t made up my mind. When I got the letter and my fiancé read it off "approved!" I was not happy. I should have felt happiness, right? Relief? No, I just felt pressure. Now it is crunch time and I need to make a decision.

A quick background: I am 29 years old and was born into an obese family. We were raised to believe ‘if you’re fat, it’s ok and if people don’t like you for it, that’s their own fault!’ My mom fell at work about 5 years ago and broke her leg, had to have surgery to fix it, and never able to fully recover because of her weight. PT was too difficult for her, and then she began to experience more problems, like bed sores and cellulitis. She is confined to a hospital bed at her home and we are now her nurses. My bf of 10 years proposed to me on Xmas and everyone began to get really excited about the wedding, especially my mom. She overdid it in PT, and fell again a few weeks ago. She broke her leg again. Truth be told, I am not even sure she will be able to make it to my wedding next summer.

I don’t want these kinds of health problems. My fiancé and I are also ready for kids of our own and I need to lose about 100 more pounds before a healthy pregnancy is possible. So I really need to make a decision …

I have told a few people here and there that I am considering this and have gotten mixed reviews. Of course, I am not the kind of person to let others make up my mind for me, but part of me does wonder if I can do it without the surgery. I have already lost 65 pounds. The logic I have been hearing is "why can’t you just keep doing what you’re doing?" I can feel myself chickening out. I guess I am just not 100% confident that this is a last resort for me. I have dieted in the past, lost weight and gained it back, but I am second-guessing whether or not I really gave it my all.

Did anyone else go through this stage fright before having the VGS, and if so how did you overcome it? Any thoughts at all are welcome. I am just scared. Thank you all for reading this.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think you just answered your own question. You dont want to have the issues your mom does, you want to start a family, you have lost and regained weight...sounds like you want to do this...you are just scared...and so is everyone to an extent. It is all about what you want...what everyone else thinks doesnt matter. You just need to sit down and really think about the big picture and where you want to be...You need to be ready mentally for this and I think you are so close. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat...sheesh, wish I had done it sooner. I was a little nervous at first but the more I read on the subject I knew it was for me. I woke up after surgery and said to myself.....I was scared...for nothing! Best of luck on your decision...keep us posted.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes your reaction is normal. Trust me when I say if you could easily be living that healthy thin life, you would be. Unfortunately some of us being healthy is a challenge and our genes are just plain working against us. I also come from a big family, and I am the first one brave enought to have the sleeve done, I can tell you for sure I won't be the only one, my cousins & aunts and inlaws are starting to ask ?'s about the sleeve.

The truth is for people like us the odds are against us, even when we lose weight on our own chances are we are going to gain it all back and then some. The one thing people on this forum always wish is that they would have done it sooner in life. This is your chance, seize it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please don't let this scare you. You are young and you see what your mother is going through every day of her life. My mother was very obese and in a wheel chair for over 10 years. When I was young I became very obese and really missed a huge portion of my life because of it. I am 65 now with all the health problems including insulin dependent diabetes. I am going to go through with it and I am also very scared because of my age. But if this had been available to me years ago I would have hoped I had gone for it. Maybe a lot of things would have been different. I still have to hope this will give me a better quality of life. :rolleyes:

Mokee

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am 36 and was not born into an obese family, but I have been yo-yo'ing with my weight for 20 years. I was sick of it. My husband and I want to try to have kids, if it's not too late. But I needed to lose about 100-130 pounds to be healthy enough to get pregnant, and have a healthy baby.

The first time I had to lose weight was only about 20 pounds (college). Then later in life after a bad break up, another 40 pounds. I could always get it off and keep it off for a while, but then as soon as life got hectic and hard -- it would come right back on. This last time, I gained 100 pounds in a single year. Then another 40 over the next year. This weight just wasn't coming off so easily. I'd lose 20-30 pounds here and there, then gain it all back as soon as I lost focus. And I'll say having a full-size stomach was not helping me. The heavier I was, the more I dealt with emotions with food. It's not like before when I could deal with emotions with getting outside, planning trips, going to the gym. I was in a vicious cycle and needed to get out to save my life.

Getting the sleeve was the right direction for me. I needed the tool of a smaller capacity stomach so that I could break the cycle of dealing with negative emotions with food. I wasn't a fast food person per se, we don't keep sweets and chips in the house. It wasn't about my food choices so much as about the quantity and my habits (going all day without eating, then having two portions of Pasta at dinner). Now, I'm so much the normal person it's scary. I can eat anything that is good for me, in the right size portions, and I'm exercising like crazy which is keeping my stress in check.

I applaud anyone who can get the weight off on their own -- but the bigger battle is keeping it off, for the rest of your life. I just knew with my history that even if I lost 130 pounds on my own, that I was very likely going to put it back on sometime in the next five years. The surgery gives me the peace of mind that I will always have this tool to my disposal, keeping me vigilant.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BabySpoons

      Sometimes reading the posts here make me wonder if some people just weren't mentally ready for WLS and needed more time with the bariatric team psychiatrist. Complaining about the limited drink/food choices early on... blah..blah...blah. The living to eat mentality really needs to go and be replaced with eating to live. JS
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×