New Here And Feeling Some Kind Of Way...

[Red597 35]

Good Morning All! I have been lurking here for about 3 weeks and have so enjoyed all of the topics and appreciated all of the information that is shared here. My surgery is scheduled for July 24.

Liek everyone else here, I have been on this weight loss roller coaster for more than half of my life. I'm 44 now, and my journey began at age 11. I was underweight and very active up until that point. It was dicovered that I had a cyst in the bone of my right femur and after surgery and a bone graft, was in a body cast for 6 months, and there came the first 50lbs. And well... you all know the rest of the story.

My issue, or should I say one of my issues, is that I know that I need and want to have this surgery so that I can finally get off of this roller coaster for good, and get on with livign my life and loving myself. However, I'm feeling a little guilty and not a little hypocritical because I am a Registered Dietitian and Diabetes Educator. This is what I do and I can't do it for myself. I feel like I can't be 100% successful in my job since I'm still on the same journey that my patients are on. It does make my way more sympathetic to their situations than other RD's ( or NUTs as they're referred to here) and even some of my co-workers because I get where they are coming from. But at they same time I feel like "how can I tell someone how to be healthy and lose weight when I can't do it myself?!" It's frustrating beyond belief...on top of all of the other emotional issues that come along on this roller coaster ride.

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest...

V

[shangefan 193]

I totally understand what you are saying, but I also think you need to cut yourself some slack. The fact that you are human and can't do all of the things you know intellectually that you should does not mean that you are not competent at your job. Nor does it mean that you are hypocritical. I would assume that even after you counsel and work with patients, some of them are able to do what you counsel and others are not. The human factor is indeed significant.

Congrats to you for doing what is necessary to take care of yourself. Look at it his way: when the weight is gone, the patients won't know how you did it. All they will know if that their dietitian is slim and trim, so she must know what she is talking about!

[Red597 35]

Thank you so much for the support Shangefan! I know that I am hardest on myself, but it definitely helps to hear some reassuring and encouraging words!!

[kczar 166]

Welcome to the boards! You're actually ahead of the game since you have all the education to know what to eat; now it's just a matter of getting this great tool to help you. Good luck.

[Wheetsin 714]

I'm an absolute "type A" personality. In fact, I could probably redefine it. If you're an MBTI person I'm an INTJ, 100% in the "I" and "T" and about 99% on the "J". Etc. etc. So I don't like to do things I will fail at, and I compensate by making sure that I don't fail at much (and perhaps don't try the things I know I will fail at). I have accomplished everything in life that I have set out to accomplish, except for managing my weight. Education, job, family, financial security/debt free, etc. And here I sit with all that, and about 100 extra lbs.

So while I'm not in the boat where my vocation eludes my personal life, I am in the boat where I cannot independently accomplish something I really should be able to accomplish. And it took a BIG HUGE dose of humble pill to finally admit that and meet it head-on. But there was a catch...

My first solution was lap-band. I lost hella weight, and then gained a good chunk of it back after my band had to come out. Talk about all those feelings of failure coming rushing back in... and now they're tainted with the bittersweet reality of having very fresh memories of what it's like to be normal...

So I get a sleeve, and I'm about 13 weeks out, and I've lost nothing for about 10 weeks now. Grr. It's like - can I please just find something that's going to work???

Good Morning All! I have been lurking here for about 3 weeks and have so enjoyed all of the topics and appreciated all of the information that is shared here. My surgery is scheduled for July 24.

Liek everyone else here, I have been on this weight loss roller coaster for more than half of my life. I'm 44 now, and my journey began at age 11. I was underweight and very active up until that point. It was dicovered that I had a cyst in the bone of my right femur and after surgery and a bone graft, was in a body cast for 6 months, and there came the first 50lbs. And well... you all know the rest of the story.

My issue, or should I say one of my issues, is that I know that I need and want to have this surgery so that I can finally get off of this roller coaster for good, and get on with livign my life and loving myself. However, I'm feeling a little guilty and not a little hypocritical because I am a Registered Dietitian and Diabetes Educator. This is what I do and I can't do it for myself. I feel like I can't be 100% successful in my job since I'm still on the same journey that my patients are on. It does make my way more sympathetic to their situations than other RD's ( or NUTs as they're referred to here) and even some of my co-workers because I get where they are coming from. But at they same time I feel like "how can I tell someone how to be healthy and lose weight when I can't do it myself?!" It's frustrating beyond belief...on top of all of the other emotional issues that come along on this roller coaster ride.

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest...

V

[buffalogal 52]

i understand how you feel. I am very successful in many aspects of my life, especially professionally,but when it comes to this, I am an absolute failure. I have actually been so unsuccessful with dieting, that I've never even yo-yoed. I gain, and that is all. It has driven me nuts that this is one thing I just can't overcome (and I've had some pretty significant challenges). Ironically, I feel like I have figured it out, and making the decision to have surgery is a sign of recognizing my options and ensuring success. I wish I saw it this was an option a lot sooner, though I'm also glad I am having surgery now, when there is a vsg option and laproscopy, and I feel like the technology and knowledge is pretty much as good as it gets.

I've been to nutritionists who are skinny-minnie and have no comprehension of our experiences. The gal who is leading my pre-op classes is like that, and a bit of a downer. Love yourself, and know you are doing a great job by your clients because you have a level of compassion that a lot of nutritionists who haven't lived it don't have.

[GivingItMyAll 168]

Welcome to the boards. You will find a lot of support here, as well as a Soror or two. Ooo-ooop!

Sent from my iPad using VST

[Red597 35]

Thank you ALL for the support and encouragement! @ buffalogal...I am with you on the "succeeding at everything else but this". I am working on my emotional issues now, so that after the surgery, I will already have stress-relief techniques and lonliness=detractors in place. I am just SO tired of the same old issues coming up again and again, so this will be one more thing I can cehck off of my list on my way to learning to love and like me, ya know? @Wheetsin...I am an ENFP, so I feel EVERYTHING lol!! @GivingItMyAll...OO)-OOP!!! So glad to have know that there are some sorors on here! "Cause I'm sure there is gonna be a whole lot of leaning on the sheild over the next few months !