What If People Treat Me Better As A Thin Person? It Would Make Me So Angry!

[missmachine 100]

On a similar note I wonder - what if friends start treating me differently in a negative way?? My best friend has already distanced herself from me, and I've only lost 10 lbs. We have been friends 12 years. She was never overweight until a couple years ago, and even still she's not too bad (about 200 lbs). I have a feeling that I always made her feel better about herself by being the big fat ugly friend. I am not sure how she will react once I lose all of this weight.

Has anyone had people in their life who started treating them negatively after losing weight/gaining confidence?

[minaleigh 95]

I know with some people I pretty much can't talk about my weight loss thus far. They either act disinterested, jealous, or condescending. Then I have some friends who say things like, "You better not get to a size (insert number here) before me or we can't be friends!" They add the just kidding line afterwards, but sometimes I wonder... Just how much of that statement is truth?

[smartypants 14]

I'm 57 AND 120 lbs overweight so I get the double whammy of prejudice!! Yes, I notice that when I am with a slender friend I am ignored even if I attempt to engage in a conversation. I'm not insecure about who I am. But, I have definitely noticed prejudice against me being a large person. Even doctors treat me in a dismissive fashion except, of course, my bariatric surgeon.

[petite-size-me! 70]

Let's get some shirts made that say "FORMER FATTY SO F*** OFF".

Or is that too strong?

I'm feeling my oates today.

Lol can you also print

My other pants are a size 28!

[Parker's Dad 50]

I was raised to always take people as they come, and to think about a person's kindness or intelligence before I think about the way they look.

We've all encountered people out there who are prejudiced and bigoted against those who are big-bodied, but what happens when those same people all of a sudden fall all over themselves to talk to you, get to know you, hook up with you, etc., just because you're thin?

I dislike prejudice of any kind, even when I'm on the "positive" end of someone's prejudice.

Those of you who have lost weight, have you noticed a positive difference in the way you've been treated in public? By waiters and waitresses, by shop assistants in clothing shops, by people on the bus, people at school or work? How do you keep yourself from resenting them for it?

Well you may as well go ahead and prepare yourself for it because it's gonna happen. Unfortunately, it's just the way of the world. It is what it is, you can't change it or the way others act. You basically have to put yourself in a good place mentally to be able to let things go in one ear and out the other, otherwise it will affect you more than it should. You will think about it for a bit but when your mind is right it really doesn't matter to you anymore.

People are a holes. People are superficial. People are judgemental. People are just people. The way I have it figured is if I wasn't good enough for you before, I am not good enough for you now that there is just less of me. I have heard people talk about dating afterwards, being asked by people that would never give them the time of day previously. To that I would have a very polite "no thank you." I don't wanna be involved with anyone that is that shallow and superficial. I am not a very trusting person anyway until you are able to earn that trust and respect. It's not just something that is given, it is earned.

Long story short, I guess you just need to get your mind right and not worry about it too much because it's gonna happen. Give it it's second of thought recognition, bank it, and let it go.

[Parker's Dad 50]

Lol can you also print

My other pants are a size 28!

I like it!!

I can probably get those printed up for ya! LOL

[Izuri 428]

Yes, some people will treat you differently when you're thin. I decided not to waste time or energy worrying about that--in fact, when it happens to me, I go out of my way to say "hello" to someone who is "invisible" like I used to be in society. Just a simple smile or quick "hello" or "how's it going?"--no big deal, but I know how it feels to not be taken seriously or not be really thought about at all--and yes, that was by my choice, exactly as cantwaittolose above said, but it is still hurtful.

I think in the end that's about all we can really do that's a positive response--just try to treat everyone the way we would want to be treated, no matter what our size, like we are there, we matter, our opinions and thoughts and feelings matter, and we're all in it together. Doesn't require anything huge or earth-shaking, and we can maybe be the agents of the change we want to see.

I really liked your post. I think it's important that we realize that we do this too and maybe we can add a little smile to another person's day =)