Humiliated.......

[Texarkolina 201]

I am scheduled for surgery on July 23, and it can't get here soon enough. I just changed jobs and got a last minute call from the new job telling me that they wanted me to travel the first week. This involved flying to Chicago. Now I am the biggest I have ever been, and I am bigger than the airplane seats. On the way up I sat next to a very nice lady that threw the armrest up as I approached and said, "I am going to leave this up if you don't mind because they make these seats too small and it makes me feel too closed in." I appreciated her being kind so much I nearly broke down in tears right there. I was able, by some miracle, to get the seatbelt fastened but it was so tight I was in a lot of pain. I swallowed my pride and asked the flight attendant for an extender, but she never brought me one and I just couldn't make myself ask again. I sat there in agony--spilling into the next seat and into the aisle--and praying that the seatbelt buckle was strong enough to hold my mass in without exploding into pieces. I can just see the headlines, "fat woman explodes seatbelt--plane makes emergency landing". I chatted with the lady beside me and apologized for crowding her. She was very kind and said that she was glad to sit by me and have someone there to talk to so she would be distracted because she is afraid to fly. I had bruises on my legs and pain in my abdomen all week where the seat belt was during the flight and I was miserable. I decided to call the airline for my return trip and see what I needed to do. They told me to wait and ask at the gate. I did--humiliated--and was treated kindly. She moved me to a seat without a seatmate. The flight attendent brough me an extender--subtly--and I made it home without further bodily injury. I know this could have been a lot worse, but in my mind I felt so humiliated by the whole experience. I worried about the return trip all week and wondered if all the people I was meeting in my new job were judging me for being so big. I just want to live in a world where I fit.

[angelakay2 117]

I hope you take a moment to email the airline about how they handled your situation. So many now are making us fluffy people buy an extra seat. You were very fortunate to have such a nice person as a seat mate. I hate flying because I feel like everyone is staring at me like I am going to make the plane fly lop-sided. Your surgery will be here before you know it!

[SittingPretty 16]

There are so many things I want to say to you right now...after I give you a big virtual hug.

The first thing I want to say is this: there are more people like the wonderful lady on your plane than there are "negative nancy's". Your new co-workers were more worried about impressing you than anything else. Believe me.

That being said....I understand how you felt.

Only another overweight person can truly understand the "prepping" it takes just to plan a trip to the mall/store/friends/park. From planning how far of a walk it is from the car to one's destination to seating to what to wear that will be comfy and not show how much I'm sweating. It's agonizing. Then to have that flight attendant ignore your request like that!! Unacceptable. The attendant allowed you to be physically harmed when she had the ability to avoid that at no cost to the airlines or you. This makes me upset.

I am so happy with the sleeve and I think you will be too. I went from a 22 to a 9 and still have about 30 lbs more to go. Before you know it you will no longer look at chair and think to yourself "will I fit" but will look at chairs and think "it needs more padding". I say this because now that the fat is gone from my bum, it gets so sore sitting!!

[BlackBerryJuice 349]

Sorry to hear that you had such a rough experience. It will be just a distant memory before you know it!

[kamrie37 134]

((hugs))

[Happy Camper 266]

Texarcarolina,

Aww, my heart just broke for you. Hugs - listen, this is soon to never happen again. There is always a table instead of a booth, just find it for now. Once you are going on your journey, never again will you have to seek any alternatives. You can and will just be!

Good luck in your weight loss journey - it is wonderful on the other side, you will get there!

Sent from my iPad using VST

[Texarkolina 201]

Thank you all so much for understanding. I know it could have been much worse, but it was upsetting enough as it was. I can't wait to be on the other side of this.

[BentleyJade 28]

Sorry that happened to you. I understand though. I've never been on a plane, but restaurants always suck. I always request a table! I will be so happy when this will all be a thing of the past! Good luck on your journey! I'm sure one day we will be that sweet lady you sat next to on the plane, and it will be sincere understanding seeing that we've been on both sides!

[chitowngirl 885]

Wow...I can only imagine your humiliation and embarrassment. However it does seem like you did have some angels in disguise, sub as the lady next to you, bless her heart. On the bright side soon you will no longer have this problem.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I know the feeling, I have been a frequent business traveler over the last 10 years. One time i was crammed into a tiny seat next to a very tall (6'6") and large (broad shouldered build and overweight) Swiss man. We were both big people so, we had to laugh about it and he was very friendly and socialable so we made the best of it, but wow was that an uncomfortable and long flight for both of us.

I also say... don't carry the humiliation, guilt and shame you feel. It is a heavy load and you don't need that! I personally think guilt and shame are unnecessary burdens, on top of everything else an obese person is dealing with!

[fattymcfatterson 107]

I am sorry you felt that humiliation. Sometimes I think these things happen to solidify our decision of getting sleeved. My preschoolers graduated this Friday and I had the full intention of being BEHIND the camera.. Well, that changed. There I was in my most unflattering work polo shirt, my sports bra boob smooshing bra and no gut sucker underneath. Out of nervousness i seemed to keep my fat little arms unnaturally close to my body, like that cartoon dinosaur from I think meet the robinsons "I have a big head and little arms." Anyways, it was horrible to watch. I did some creative cropping on the video to try to limit the constant side view of Miss Fatty McFatterson.... But, I am now forever etched in the videos of the class of 2012. (Thank GOD preschoolers don't judge you by your weight!!!) I am more then ready to get this done when my 6 mo diet is over. I guess my point is don't let humiliation have the victory... The victory is this will be the last time you experience this and when you are flying skinny you will probly look for the girl who is facing humiliation and rescue her. You will always have compassion because you lived it. I pray your surgery and recovery go textbook and look forward to joining you on the losers bench, where we ALL fit!

[pdog 51]

I relate to u so much with this story, as do most of us... I just had to reply and just say I'm thinking of u and soon we won't have these worries and problems.

[Mommymook 16]

Big hugs!!!

Boy oh boy can I relate about the plane!!

Ive traveled internationally since Jan 06 --Ive been overweight longer then this -- but from 2006 til 2008 I traveled alone so I was always seated next to strangers. International airlines arent always very nice about big people traveling. I always have to ask for a seat belt extender, Ive never been able to buckle one. It is so embarassing. I ask as soon as I get on the plane, as I am walking to my seat. Ive sat next to some pretty rude people, but I just apologized for crowding them. Thankfully in 2011 and this year I have had my girlfriend and 4yr old son to travel with me so usually its us 3 in a row together so the only people I am crowding dont mind. It still sucks so bad to crowd anyone, need a seat belt extender, and not be able to use my tray table I cant wait to have those nsv's!

All this will be in the past very soon! Hang in there!!!

[kwindham 57]

That airline attendant should be reprimended. That is terrible that she just ignored your request. Feel so bad for you, but like another poster said, dont carry these neg feelings around. Realize you are going to get slimmer and healthier very soon! Hugs!

[RawrrAshleex3 137]

I can imagine. I worked at a day care until abt a month ago, and they have these pads that go on the children's chairs so adults can sit on them. I was so embarrassed when I sat down and broke one ): one day, we'll be skinny Minnie's and the angels next to someone in that situation (: