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Yoda's Jedi Journals (aka Yoda's Yammerin's)



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This was (and yet maybe) the journal entry that I had written the night before my surgery (May 3rd 2007)... Since the journals are STILL not working, I will post it here for you all to read... I am sorry, it is long... Here goes....

Epic Battle…

I have walked in the valley of shadows and come out the other side! (Maybe not entirely whole, but I have done it!)

About 10 days ago I started the Pre-op diet of Y&CC. Day 1 was hard, work had many of my favourite nibbles on hand. Next to me, startling me a little when I noticed, was the shadowy figure of doubt. You may know It by other names, Gluttony, Nibbles, Grazer, Go-a-head, Why-not, and many others. It stood beside me and offered all those tasty treats to me, with the promise of no consequences if I had some. But I knew that to be a lie. In a battle that rivalled the finally of LOTR:ROTK,:fencing: It and I had at it. No holds barred, only one of us would win. If It won, I would dive into the tasty morsels presented to me like a two peckered hoot owl in mating season locked in the barn with 1000 females. If I won, I would be free of It for a while and my resistance to the food would hold. For 8 hours we fought, not a moment of rest, no quarter was given, and none were taken. As the bell tolled on the end of the 8th hour, we had fought to a stale mate. Luckily the battle kept me away from the food and in a small way, I achieve victory.

Day 2 it began again, the moment I awoke, It was there, hounding me to dive into the sweets and yummys I had around the house. Again the battle raged as I battled for my very existence, It on the never relenting attack, using my own memory of the foods I was now denied as bait to weaken my will and lessen my resolve. Again the battle raged,;) the ground slippery with the gooey centres of snack foods, and the carcases of yoghurt containers strewn about like lost souls in the anteroom to Hell. But again as the bell tolled to end the day, I was exhausted and the mere thought of food, brought tears to my eyes and bile to my throat. I had won another day, but It swore It would see me fail, and would return to do so.

Day 3, 4 and 5 It changed its tactics. It began a guerrilla war against my will power. Attaching when I wasn’t expecting it, making me look at food to see the quick nibble, :croc: the tiny morsel that could never hurt me to just pop into my mouth and make go away. It was a hard battle again. Making me tired as I tried to keep my defences at the ready. But It was cunning, sensing every frailty in my armour and exploiting them to make me stumble and fall. But as the day wore on I found it easier to combat the devil with Twinkies in its eyes. Until the bell tolled again on the end of the day and I found myself energized. For I had won repeatedly against It and with each victory, I found my armour stronger.:(

The final 5 days It would rear Its ugly head, but strangely, Its power over me was non-existent. It would use all the tricks from all the other days and I would hardly even respond, to the point of watching other eat and be slightly sickened by their choices or their manners.

It came only once today (Thurs. May 3), while I was cooking Bacon, the smell had me entranced and suddenly It was there, offering me one fragment of a crispy slice. But I only eyed the morsel dispassionately before scoffing at It and turning away:nono: . And from the corner of my eye, I saw something I never thought I would see in my life time, It hung it’s head, defeated and slunk back into the shadows.

I had won!:whoo:

For the first time, I had beaten It back to the point of It giving up and leaving :evil: :whip: . I smiled as I watched It retreat to the shadowy part of my brain that currently has no pull on me. It was a nice feeling to look at the world and not worry about my next slip, or taste, or blunder with regards to food.

For the first time, I controlled It, not the other way around.

I had stared the beast in the eye and made it blink first.

I entered a personal Hell and walked through it to the other side, with nary a mark to show for it.

Yes… I no longer fear Hell…

(It fears me!!!)

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Wow. Mr. Yoda, that is an amazing post. I have one day left till my pre-op diet and I am already terrified that I will fail. That I won’t be able to last for 2 weeks. Thank you for sharing your experience with us. It was inspiring and gave me hope.

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Not only a great husband but a writer as well, whew what a lucky Mrs. Yoda.

p.s. glad you beat that devil

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Just reading some of Mr. Yoda's posts about that funny feeling at the back of your throat - like a hair or something is stuck there.

I had that too.

Interesting that there were a few posts saying they too had this feeling.

Did you ever figure out what what was? I thought perhaps is was a "soft stop" signal.

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I am unsure what the "hair feeling" was, it could be an actual hair (tho I never found one), or it could have been an abrasion from the tube they had down my throat during the porcedure, or even as you said the soft stop signal.

But I have had it less and less since last week, it is all but gone now and tomorrow will be 2 weeks since the banding. If other have the feeling hopefully they too will take note and share their conclusions (if they make any)

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I am unsure what the "hair feeling" was, it could be an actual hair (tho I never found one), or it could have been an abrasion from the tube they had down my throat during the porcedure, or even as you said the soft stop signal.

You are still on full liquids, you should not be eating hair at this point (okay I just threw up a little when I wrote that).

I remember there being a little tickle in the throat and I chalked it up to the tube. It should go away.

Andrew

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I had mashed potatoes with supper (Cream O' Broc and cheese soup)... they were YUUUUUUUMMMMMmmmmmMMMMMmmmmMMmmmY!!!!:hungry:

And I got a blizzard for desert (or is it dessert? I can never spell that one), anyway... It was OK but I could have missed it and never known...

tomorrow I have eggs and Mashed spuds for Lunch!!!! I can HARDLY wait!!!

:clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2:

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Hey Mr. Yoda sorry about the hair feeling. I got that after I had a Soup that was pretty fibrous. Maybe that was it?

Anyway I always remember dessert is spelled with two s's because one dessert is never enough (obviously that reminder was post banding but still it works) :mad:

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:hungry: :hungry: :hungry:

Here are a couple of Menu items I had over the last few days... I thought I would share since others are in my boat currently.... Also... if you are pre op dieting you may want to skip... (disclaimer for those that need one)

:hungry: :hungry: :hungry:

A nice meal I had for supper was:

1/2 cup Blender chicken (done dry to keep it's chickeny appearence)

1/4 Cup Mashed (pureed) Potatoes

1/4 cup-ish Mushroom Soup

Pile chicken on plate to simulate chix Breast

Spread mashed Pots to cover about same area as Chicken, making top flat

Cover both with mushroom Soup (Like gravy) to moisten chicken and potatoes adding lots of Yummy flavour!

Enjoy

:hungry: :hungry: :hungry:

1/4 cup refried Beans

1/4 cup Mashed potatoes

1/4 cup Blender Chicken (done dry to keep it's chickeny appearence)

3 shakes Chilli powder or Tex-Mex Seasoning

2 Tbsp Salsa

2 Tbsp Sour Cream

2 Tbsp Shredded Cheddar

Spread Refried on the bottom of a bowl

Cover (best you can) with Mashed Pots

Cover with Chicken

shake seasoning over top to taste

Cover with Plastic wrap and Microwave for 1 minute

Remove cover sprinkle cheese on top and recover and nuke 1 minute

Remove cover add Salsa and Sour Cream

Enjoy

:hungry: :hungry: :hungry:

There you have a couple dishes I have tried and liked since my pureed diet began. Hope you like...

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Congrats on your success Mr Yoda,

I love your journalling and the menus are great. Hope you're enjoying your long weekend.

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I'm still hovering around the 1-2 lbs to goal. I'm frustrated but being sick hasn't helped. I believe the body is conserving strength to fight the infection. Lets hope that the specialist has a solution.

You're looking fantastic! congrats on your successes.

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