kcage 33 Posted May 17, 2012 Ok guys and gals.......... I am sooooo happy to report for those who are pre-op and very newly post-op that my sex drive has returned. I used to blame my lack of sexual excitement on the fact that: 1. You don't have as much sex once your married( however this was one sided as my husband thought buying the cow meant more milk!) 2. The kids....always around, sleep in the bed with you blah blah blah 3. There is so much more I could productively be spending my time on such as laundry, cooking, cleaning...excuse excuse excuse and then it hit me while watching BBC the show that comes on and takes all the food people are eating and lay it out on the table is gross. And the host told the couple that was on there that when they drew thier blood how food was ruining everything and this married couple was only being intimate three to four times a year. Anniversary, each birthday and maybe Valentine's day or Christmas. And I realized it was my weight. Sooooooooooooo 5 1/2 weeks post op and 30 lbs lighter and I am frisky! I noticed more energy during intimacy. I enjoy it again, it's not another chore on my list, I have even tried on some of my old sexy night gowns. My husband even requested a particular one! This has been a major NSV for me as I am sure all of you ladies can relate. So am I close to goal.......nope, has my life already changed.....yep the second I woke up from surgery! If you are pre-op and needing reassurance just know it will be difficult but sooo worth it. Take back the years that have been given over to obesity, bad health and being unhappy with who you see in the mirror. And welcome that healthier you that has been locked away! GO GET YOU! 4 weight_no_longer, ShellBear, tlaff79 and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NisaletOAM 48 Posted May 17, 2012 Thank you for sharing and congrats on the new you Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FishingNurse 1,211 Posted May 17, 2012 This is my favorite thing about being comfortable in my skin now. Luckily I found the love of my life 2 months post op..... This girl is in love and has the sex drive to match..... LOVE IT Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kcage 33 Posted May 17, 2012 Something that I've learned, as a guy, is that women who are unhappy with their self image when it comes to weight often attribute "the deed" to just another "chore" - Speaking for myself personally, if I'm attracted to someone as they are at that moment, weight or not, won't matter to me. Sadly, it's that whole "does this ____ make me look fat" mentality. It's not your fault, just how your wires are connected. Just watch, soon enough your husband will be like "DAAAANG WOMAN! Slow down!" I've seen it happen a couple of times with other friends who lost a lot of weight. Better warn him now. LOL I am loving that you posted this and I was actually hoping to get a male's perspective. My husband is a great guy who has said the weight didn't matter he didn't even want me to have the surgery, but he has been so supportive, he met me when I was MUCH smaller and has still tried to make me feel sexy and beautiful even at my heaviest but I agree those wires are crazy! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kcage 33 Posted May 17, 2012 This is my favorite thing about being comfortable in my skin now. Luckily I found the love of my life 2 months post op..... This girl is in love and has the sex drive to match..... LOVE IT Congratulations.....there is no better feeling than being in love with yourself and a great person. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DesertRat 32 Posted May 17, 2012 I'm very happy for you, both that you are doing better, and even more so, that you have a great partner in life. These can only be good things. I put on weight after I got married and didn't want sex. I felt ashamed of myself, too fat to be desirable, etc, etc. Too bad this option didn't exist back then. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WillowsKnot 71 Posted May 17, 2012 Well I am a single mom and currently don't have a SO, but I have had many dates, etc. and it is truly how we see ourselves. The guys I have been with never cared. They liked me for me. I am glad to know that I will now like me for me. I already like me better. I just feel better. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NancyJerry 139 Posted May 17, 2012 Fun Post! Good for you!! And BENJAMMIN - very cool that you posted too! Always fun to have a brave male's perspective! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites