I Miss My Food

[Sandpiper 6]

As I marked the two-week anniversary of my sleeve on my calendar, I realize how much I miss my food. All I wanted to do today was go out with my family and go have a good meal -- I wanted a hamburger and fries and a Coke. Now don't get me wrong. I know that what I have done will enable me to live a healthier life going further, but the truth is, I feel like I am mourning the loss of a good friend.

I have been through all sorts of therapy and I know, and always have known, that food was my "drug-of-choice". However, nothing in my life has been provided me such unconditional love like food. Food has always been such an integral part of my life that now I struggle with how much I miss it. It never said no. It never broke my heart. It always made me happy.

My mother had a gastric-bypass 20 years ago and gained all her weight back in addition to more. I don't want to do that. I want to live a healthy life full of joy. But now I struggle with what joy is when it isn't derived from food-based activities. What provides joy like a warm cake out of the oven or a nice carb-loaded dinner with family and friends? Where do I go from here?

[Joni 94]

I too am almost 2 weeks out. I could really relate to all you said. I feel the same. Someone on this site told me - you will have all those foods again, just NOT NOW. I already kinda knew that, but it did help me feel better just to tell myself I was going to eat my favs again later. Also, I am starting to look into a gym membership. Maybe that's what we need to do. I hear those endorphins that are released during exercise can make us feel a whole lot better. Then of course, seeing the weight drop off is going to fill a gap too. I'll be interested to hear what others have to say also. Hang in there! Hugs.

[feszyk 6]

I'm not a doctor or counselor, but you are feeling exactly what you should be feeling. This is a adaptive process in the head and heart, and you're just along for the ride. So ride it out . Try to work through any resentment you may be pulling up as you go by consciously acknowledging the logic behind it being there (i.e. you feel disconnected and alone w/o your friend food) and then offering the reason why you've chosen this strategy. Lather rinse & repeat.

[reinventingdee 7]

The mind can do some mean things to us and missing your old food is one of them. Just think, it has been years that we run to chocolate cake and lovely carbs, but just as our journey begins we must let go of the past. We all risked our lives for a surgery, why on earth would we put toxic things back into our body? Miss your old food friends, but don't plan your reunion of when you can eat them again. Get excited about preparing healthy meals, losing weight, gaining control over head hunger. It is not always easy, I almost cried the other day for hot warm bread. But the moment passed eventually and I was very proud I did not visit that old friend bread:-) Hang in there and your feelings are very normal.

[shellbell33081 115]

Has food really made you happy? You had the surgery for a reason. You were unhappy about your weight. Well, food got us to the point we felt we needed surgery and therefore, food actually made us unhappy. I completely understand how you feel. I am also 2 weeks out and miss some foods, but I tell myself food is the reason I was unhappy. Chinese and pizza made me fat. I can't control myself with those foods so I had surgery to stop the out of control eating. I'm sure these feelings will pass. Stay strong! WE CAN DO THIS!!

[Kandi24z 2]

I feel the same way!!! I never was a coke drinker or any sodas but I really want a coke!!!!!! I have random cravings of the day each day its a new thing...

[mrsnate 55]

I could have written this post myself. I'm 9 days out and I miss food too. Afterall, food has been my lifelong friend. I want a big salad with a Diet Coke. But like Joni reminded us, we will someday have those foods again. I'm okay only eating 1/4 of my food...more leftovers! Hang in there, we're in this together.

[Sandpiper 6]

Thank you all for writing. It has helped me more than you can imagine. Now that I am feeling a lot better from surgery, I know it's my old behaviors haunting me. For the first two weeks it has been about just surviving the surgery and getting better. Now it's about moving past the terrible cravings just to fill my mouth with empty carbs or sugary sweets. I have a lot of emotion about this feeling of depravity. I am not about to jeopardize my surgery or why I had it, I am just really having a hard time filling my mind with other things that distract it so that the "cravings" don't come back.

[cconner 0]

I am having alot of trouble with craving foods.....I know I will get them again and I know this is just all mental...But it is still very hard for me!!!!

[CrazyCatLady 130]

Today is my 3rd week post-op.

The family wanted BBQ last night, so we all went out to my FAVORITE BBQ place here in Tucson, the Brushfire BBQ Company.

This was my first time exposed to "eating out" since surgery. I haven't even been on puree a week yet, and there was nothing on the menu that I felt comfortable with attempting to eat, so I sipped on iced tea while everyone else ate ribs, wings, mac'n cheese, etc.

And it was the first time since surgery that I felt ANGRY at other people for eating in front of me. Crazy, right? I couldn't sleep last night, I was up pacing and going crazy over hating the events of the evening, wishing I could rewind and not have surgery, and have been sitting at the table, eating grilled garlic bread and wings and whatnot.

I let food get me fat. I have had more Pasta and wings than any human should ever conceivably in a lifetime...I ate them all in a decade instead of spacing them out, and now I must deal with the consequence.

Like you, I know this is "normal", but it feels alien. I hope it passes soon.

[hellonurse 76]

I too was tormented yesterday by going out with the family. To one of the best Italian places.

It was a birthday party. I sat there and only had ice water

My daughter felt so sad eating pizza, and my all time favorite: Spahgetti with meatballs,( sigh)

I was so proud of myself. My Mom was trying to psych me out, Honey just think about how much fatter were all getting( and they are ALL already obese) and how skinny you're getting. Lovely.

I am only 2 weeks post op, so the missing my food wounds are still so fresh. I have been without my beloved for 4 weeks now, but I have also lost 30lbs!! That's so worth it

Sent from my iPhone using VST

[cconner 0]

My Dr. says I have to do all liquid diet for 4 weeks....broth, Water, G2, Protein Shakes. This is day 10 I just hope I make it 4 weeks of this. I have read where alot of patient only have to do this liquid diet for 2 weeks not sure why......

[topgun 63]

Boy, do I hear you! I think I miss just the act of eating a "good" meal, not so much specific foods (but a big chunk of prime rib sure sounds good). We have no choice but to make the best of it and make lemonade out of the lemons. At best, I guess we face a max capacity of around 1 to 1/2 cups way down the line. Even that seems a little far-fetched in light of the fact that I can only eat about 1/3 cup of food at a time comfortably. Sigh.... I'm glad that I'm losing all this weight and all, but I might have had a change of heart about the surgery had I thought long and hard about this. But, like I said, I'm glad I went through with it.

[Sabra 7]

U took the words right out of my mouth today is day 10 for me and I only have 4 more days till purée foods and I must say the cravings r driving me bonkers! Tomorrow I have a mothers day luncheon at my daughters school where the kids r serving us catered Olive Garden till now I've pretty much done my best at staying out of situations where food was a big factor and I must say I'm terrified ! I just keep thinking 3 more weeks 3 more weeks!!

[thewinds 7]

I am feeling the same, I want Pasta and pizza and omg just a blt or some cheese burger off my grill with all the topics onions tomatoes lettuce ect.... I want fried fish and chips and I miss so much each day is harder and I have stronger temptations I work hardto ignore them and focus on my shakes and couple bites of solids I can get down, I want a big bit of steak take a big bite and not chew it to death. The only thing that keeps me sane is seeing the scale drop daily and how far I've come.