Regret? Maybe...

[Mews 37]

Right now, for me, I am regretting the surgery. Since I was sleeved I've been suffering from serious energy issues and am having a hard time with memory and concentration. At first my doctor thought it was due to the low amount of calories I was taking in during the clear liquid phase. However, I have progressed through the full liquid and into the soft stage without much improvement. I've made sure that I'm getting in enough Proteins and Water and upped the amount of carbs I'm consuming to help bring some of that energy back. Also, I'm taking my Multivitamins and Calcium twice a day and Iron and B12 once a day. However, what improvement I've seen has been minimal. I still cannot drive on my own and have serious trouble getting through the day. What's worse is that I work two jobs which give me three 10 hour days in a row and I can barely make it halfway through without feeling like I'm going to pass out. My surgeon is a bit stymied by my condition but I think I'm going to get a full bloodwork done when I see him next week.

I've also developed an extensive blood clot in one of my legs. Not the typical complication for this surgery but still a very serious one. This is mainly my fault though because in my haze I forgot to take my blood thinners after the surgery. Thankfully when I felt the eerily familiar pain in my leg--I've had a clot before that threw a pulmonary embolism--I started back up on my blood thinners. I went for a Doppler and they confirmed a clot. Since I had been on the blood thinners for a few days there was no need for me to stay in the hospital but to say that I've been scared s**tless the past week would be an understatement. The last time I had a clot it literally almost killed me. The day I went to the hospital to get it checked out was when it threw the embolism, which was a saddle type embolism that blocked both branches of my pulmonary artery. My doc said if I hadn't already been in the hospital on heparin I would've been dead in a half an hour. While my current clot is "smaller" than the last one I still have fears of dying from the damn thing.

I'm also dealing with an infection in my largest incision. When the bandages were removed, I must have drained a pint of Fluid over my doctor. It isn't deep but it has been draining for the past couple of weeks and recently the fluid coming out has been green. Hopefully the antibiotics will deal with that one.

To top it all off, I'm a month out an have only lost 18lbs which to me is not worth what I've been through. Yes, I realize this is weight I probably wouldn't have lost on my own but living with the fear of dying at any moment...it's just not worth it.

I'm sorry for venting but I literally have no one to talk to about this except for my husband and right now he's incredibly mad at the whole situation himself. On top of that he just informed me that he was "against the surgery" even though he never said anything before hand. Don't get me wrong, he is a good husband and he's trying his hardest but it's difficult to understand unless you are going through what I'm going through.

[LMJ 6]

Wow! I am so sorry to hear its been this hard for you. I am praying for a quick turn around for you.

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

If I have this right, your 4 weeks post op. You have had it pretty rough and only lost 18 lbs. That's pretty good considering your having a rough start. It will get better, you just need to make it though 4 more weeks and hopefully the blood clot situation will have cleared up. Are you able to walk? I know my surgeon wanted me to walk for a few minutes every hour to help prevent blood clots from forming. It was difficult because I was tired.

Have you ever read anything on ketosis? Since we can't really eat much carbs, our bodies go into a state of ketoses. Which really effects how we think and process stuff. It does help us burn fat quicker though.

Please hang in there, it does get better. Rest as much as you can and walk as much too. Walking helps alot with energy levels. Oh and drink lots of Water. If your dehydrated, you will be fatigued. Hope this helps.

[smileen 17]

I was overwhelmed just reading your story you are so busy and have had a difficult time but you are only a month from the surgery it does take time for your body to adjust. You mentioned feeling like passing sometimes could you be having low blood sugar? have you tried a snack when this happens? Have you had blood cultures since there was an infection in your site? I feel sad you are so unhappy I hope you feel better soon. Make sure you are drinking plenty as dehydration can make you feel very sick also.

[iegal 460]

Oh honey, this journey is not easy. I will tell you that I did not feel "normal" with energy levels until about 6 months out.

Think about it ... your body was probably getting 2000 calories a day with 200+ carbs plus all the sugar. Now you are lucky to get under half of those calories and carbs (hopefully little sugar) and you expect your body to be happy? My body was angry. i was lethargic, low energy for at least three months even with adequate liquids, taking Vitamins. I was detoxing, eliminating soda, no caffine, minimal carbs and so on. Boy did my body rebel.

Stick in there. I promise things will get better. Stick to the diet plan. Maybe UP your calories - really. Sometimes body is in starvation mode. You are learning about how to eat and what to eat. This is a journey, not a script to follow to the letter.

Hugs and feel free to contact me directly if you ever want to vent one on one. No regrets - I love my sleeve!

[crazycravings 15]

Give yourself some more time.....there is no sense in regret because you cannot go back. It will get better, I am 4 weeks out and I am very tired- I just started my B12 supplements but I can barely make it thru the days....BUT better days are ahead;) I was fatigued all the time before so the difference is I am 25 lbs lighter.

[dawnr 16]

I am so sorry to hear of your situation but can tell you as everyone else has said that it will get better. I wish you didn't have to go thru this and that all would be going great right now but sometimes we have to deal with bad things to get to the good ones. I pray that you are better very soon. Keep us all informed everyone here is supporting you.

[BenisaMartim4 369]

Girl, I know how you feel! I am two months out and am dropping weight like crazy, but I feel like total crud. I can barely drink, I get about 2-300 cal a day and I am so weak that I can hardly go. I have had the banana bag IV 6 times. My body is not adjusting well at all. Don't get me wrong, I am not to the point of total regret, but I am scared. I feel like, what if I did this to lose weight and get healthier and I end up dying because of organ failure from starvation. I don't know how rational that is, but I know that I can't eat right now and that can only go on for so long. I just keep remembering seeing the movie about Karen Carpenter when I was a kid. Her heart gave out because it was starved to death. Today I was envisioning myself with a feeding tube. It is really sad that in our Quest to find health, sometimes we find ourselves in even more precarious positions. I really, really hope you start to improve soon. Don't give up. We couldn't know how it would turn out without trying, but we did know we were on a one way track to death before. I'll say a prayer for you and you say one for me. Sometimes it helps us to stop looking at ourselves and focus on someone else for awhile. Best wishes for a speedy recovery and a successful weight loss.

Sent from my iPad using VST

[Sassygirl06 962]

I am so sorry that all of this has happened to you! I really am praying for your speedy recovery. I do know that I was very tired for a long time after the surgery...about 2 months. I now am 8 months out as of tomarrow, and I can say that my energy level is threw the roof....way better than before. As for the weight loss, I only lost 18 pounds the first month, and then the second month only 4 pounds do to the 3 week stall that lasted about 2 weeks. Since then I have lost about 8 to 12 pounds a month, depending on how much I exercise and how well I stick to my eating Protein and avoiding carbs.

As for the blood clots, you definatly have an angel out there watching over you! Once you have lost more weight this problem of getting blood clots should go away, since being overweight increases your chances of blood clots. I will be praying for you! Best wishes and ((HUGS)) your way!

I can tell you once this situation has passed you will be so happy that you did this to improve your health in the long run! again ((HUGS))

[Veda 12]

I am so sorry that all of this has happened to you! I really am praying for your speedy recovery. I do know that I was very tired for a long time after the surgery...about 2 months. I now am 8 months out as of tomarrow, and I can say that my energy level is threw the roof....way better than before. As for the weight loss, I only lost 18 pounds the first month, and then the second month only 4 pounds do to the 3 week stall that lasted about 2 weeks. Since then I have lost about 8 to 12 pounds a month, depending on how much I exercise and how well I stick to my eating Protein and avoiding carbs.

As for the blood clots, you definatly have an angel out there watching over you! Once you have lost more weight this problem of getting blood clots should go away, since being overweight increases your chances of blood clots. I will be praying for you! Best wishes and ((HUGS)) your way!

I can tell you once this situation has passed you will be so happy that you did this to improve your health in the long run! again ((HUGS))

So great to see how well you've done SassyGirl!! My weight loss is super slow, but it is all moving in the right direction. Congrats to you!!!

[thinoneday 445]

ugh, your husband sounds like mine, except i'm out now 3 years, doing great and he still reminds me how "hes against the surgery and always was, and that he just didn't say anything" big weenie! Not that it would have changed my mind anyhow. . .hehehe. . .

this is just a temporary thing your going through, your body has to readjust from all that is going on with it. . it takes time and in the beginning i really hated this surgery. . .i secretly wished i had never had it either. . . but then things started to come together, I relearned how to eat, drink, and live life again and now at 3 years out, I do suffer from malabsorption but i take my Vitamins as needed and finally am at peace with myself. . . it's going to happen for you too, just be patient. . . but do keep your doctor appts and if you feel really bad, please consult with the physician especially with your other problems. . . good luck and keep us posted!

[Sassygirl06 962]

So great to see how well you've done SassyGirl!! My weight loss is super slow, but it is all moving in the right direction. Congrats to you!!!

remember that slow and steady wins the race! you will get there honey!