To Tell Or Not To Tell?

[Cmullinvegas 39]

I'm struggling with this as well. Windy city mom and vance have made some good points. It is perfectly acceptable to say, your surgery is private. Originally, I only told 3 friends who had cosmetic surgery previously. That plan has changed because I have already delt with some busy bodies as well. I am a teacher and told my business manager I needed to take sick days for surgery. I didn't say what surgery but she told atleast 3 people. I didn't even tell some of my closest friends but they knew something was going on, so I ended up telling 3 more. I was stunned by the support, one friend is a stick and has never delt with weight problems, we eat lunch together and she has seen and heard my struggles. She told me surgery is gutsy, but her sister-in-law did it too. Another friend researched my surgery and was asking about my Protein. To clarify, telling or not is your choice, I mean who doesn't lose weight on a liquid diet, but you might be pleasantly surprised by sharing.

[Cmullinvegas 39]

I'm struggling with this as well. Windy city mom and vance have made some good points. It is perfectly acceptable to say, your surgery is private. Originally, I only told 3 friends who had cosmetic surgery previously. That plan has changed because I have already delt with some busy bodies as well. I am a teacher and told my business manager I needed to take sick days for surgery. I didn't say what surgery but she told atleast 3 people. I didn't even tell some of my closest friends but they knew something was going on, so I ended up telling 3 more. I was stunned by the support, one friend is a stick and has never delt with weight problems, we eat lunch together and she has seen and heard my struggles. She told me surgery is gutsy, but her sister-in-law did it too. Another friend researched my surgery and was asking about my Protein. To clarify, telling or not is your choice, I mean who doesn't lose weight on a liquid diet, but you might be pleasantly surprised by sharing.

[gettinthinner 4]

if you tell people you had WLS and didn't tell the type..I've noticed the automatic assumption is that people think you had a gastric bypass....only because its the only WLS they know about...so by not telling them you'll letting their incorrect assumption take place

No,I didn't tell people I was having weight loss surgery. Because so many of my friends are long distance, I did announce on face book that I was going to have minor surgery, nothing to be concerned about. But I did not mention what kind of surgery, to what part of the body etc. I wanted to be able to talk about my hospital experience a bit since it involved travelling and family etc. But now people want to know what kind of surgery I had. They are not satisfied enough with me saying that it was successful and not life threatening. I guess I will have to find a polite way to say mind your own business. Perhaps i never should have said anything about surgery. Now I made the mistake about mentioning my weight loss and I guess this confuses the issue. Some people do know but there are others who I just don't wish to tell.

[lyndynojo 140]

Everyone has to do what makes them comfortable, but I tell anyone that asks. My reason for this is someone told me or I would never have even considered it for myself and I am so grateful that she chose to share. Since my surgery one of my cousins has had the sleeve and a best friend is having it this month, both due to my surgery and weightloss. Weightloss is such a battle and I just think I would like to help as many people as I can win this battle. I put myself in their shoes and if a friend was losing a lot of weight and I needed to lose too and asked them how they are doing it and they told me just diet and exercise and then I found out they had surgery I would feel a little betrayed. I just love what my sleeve has done for me and love sharing it.

[Vsglass 17]

My Dietician said that I should decide in advance what I wanted to tell people because the weight loss can be rapid and substantial and people will assume I've been very ill (I have to say, that never occurred to me...)!

I have told close friends and family who have all had their share of diet success and failures over the years. It didn't seem fair for me to lose weight and have them ask me how and for me to say "eat less move more". I know they would go away feeling pleased for me but a failure for not being able to do it themselves (we've all been there). Didn't seem fair.

Each to their own though. You must do what feels right for you.

[diochick 40]

I am by no means an open book. I've told my husband, mother in law( only because she needed to watch the kids for me) she told much sister in law, and I told a friend of mine. I live in Pa, my parents live in AZ, I've never told them. I see them about once every 2/3 years, so it'll be a shock the next time they see me, but it would seem possible based on how long it's been since they saw me last.

[Squisha 99]

I have told everyone. I'm 1 of the only ones in my family that is not extremely private about everything. My mom just told some of her friends I was haveing minor surgery but for the most part I don't care who knows. Actually the only people I haven't told is some of my husbands family they made some annoying comments last year and we will see them again this summer and they will NOT be told I had surgery.

[betterthanbefore 19]

I havent even told my mom.only my husband knows an one sister..i have another sister i have not told cause i find her sometimes innocently spilling the beans...so i choose not to tell anyone..when i get the surgery i am just gonna tell my boss it was a hernia fix..which is true as well..i dont like my private life getting out there.

[ToyBoy 26]

I shared with a few co-workers and my immediate family. The problem I have is those people sharing my news with other people. I asked my wife and family to keep it private, but we know how that goes. I just told____and she told_____ and they told____. I just want to be able to tell my own story. If someone shows interest in surgery, I would disclose my surgery, other than that it would depend on the mood I'm in. I don't have much time to entertain haters. I'm trying to make up for lost time.

[newtonya2012 6]

I am just wondering how people have handled telling others about their surgery. Several of my friends on Facebook know I have had surgery because I commented on it several times. BUT' date=' I didn't mention what kind of surgery I had. I told a few close friends but find I don't know how to handle others who have seen me or have heard me mention weight loss and want to know what kind of surgery I had. I won't lie to them but at the same time there are people who I do not wish to tell - people who will disapprove or think it was unnecessary. I know that people who do not see me often, who I see only when I travel, are bound to notice a difference in my weight. Should I tell them I had surgery or just say thanks. I find myself not wanting to tell anyone I had surgery and locally feel upset when I discover the rumour mill has spread the word. I know that people think it is the easy way out but we all know that it has challenges and it not really so easy. Is there a way to tell people to mind their own business. I have one friend in particular who keeps writing me and asking me what the name of my surgery was, because she thinks she might want to have surgery as well. I never told her I was having weight loss surgery and I would like to tell her that my surgery details are private. Any advice. Do others feel it is private and not want to reveal that they had WLS?

So far my weight loss has brought me down to a level that I have reached through dieting before so people see me and may say that I am looking good but not say I have lost weight. I am hoping very much that I will lose more weight, more than people have seen me reach before and then they will start wondering how I am losing the weight. Do I have to tell? I am living in a small place where people could find out without me telling so it could be a bit awkward. It s not a big issue but the one friend who keeps asking ellme via email, without seeing my weight loss, is starting to get on my nerves. I do not want to discuss my surgery with her and wish she would just be happy to hear that I have been losing weight. Grr.[/quote']

I have choose to keep it private. I have only told one person . People are noticing the weight coming off and I tell them I'm eating better which is actually true. It's funny because now other people particularly at work who didn't have surgery are trying to eat better.

[cookies 56]

It's certainly a personal decision, but I've decided to be totally open about it.

Basically, when I thought about it, it occurred to me that this surgery isn't something to feel ashamed about, so I'm going to treat it the same way I would treat getting shots in my knees or going to my yearly physical...pretty matter of factly.

[LMJ 6]

I have told everyone! What I noticed in telling everyone a lot of ppl have done it as well or know someone that they put me in contact that has. To me I admitted I had a problem and now I am going to fix it

[newtonya2012 6]

It's certainly a personal decision' date=' but I've decided to be totally open about it.

Basically, when I thought about it, it occurred to me that this surgery isn't something to feel ashamed about, so I'm going to treat it the same way I would treat getting shots in my knees or going to my yearly physical...pretty matter of factly.[/quote']

It's totally up to you whether you tell people or not but at the same time not telling people doesn't always mean your ashamed of it. I think it's just your choice whether to keep it private or not. It's all in the way you feel.

[aviiva 140]

I have kept out pretty private I did not feel like answering questions or people watching to see what I am eating. now I have to figure out what to tell people at work why i was out a week. my best friend at work who does know said my friends at work have been asking about me. i think i will say i had a hernia repairs which i really did. i just told my brother yesterday I had the surgery 4/4 he was do happy for me and watched the operation on you tube. I decided I will pick and choose carefully who I tell I am going back to work wed

[betterthanbefore 19]

I have kept out pretty private I did not feel like answering questions or people watching to see what I am eating. now I have to figure out what to tell people at work why i was out a week. my best friend at work who does know said my friends at work have been asking about me. i think i will say i had a hernia repairs which i really did. i just told my brother yesterday I had the surgery 4/4 he was do happy for me and watched the operation on you tube. I decided I will pick and choose carefully who I tell I am going back to work wed

That is exactly my plan...to many haters out there.