Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Hates When Friends Try To Talk Me Out Of Surgery!



Recommended Posts

My husband just came home from practice and told me how 2 friends of ours were trying to discourage me having the surgery. Telling him I should just go on a real strict diet instead. One of our mutual friends is in the hospital for second time since surgery 8 months ago because of severe fecal impaction causing obstruction. I didn't even realize they knew I was having surgery. He took up for my decision, said he wanted to have it done and I had researched it thoroughly. I know they are just concerned but still irritates me!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The people that judge don't understand our struggles. "A real strict diet? WOW!!!! Why didn't I think of that?!" If you are comfortable with your decision and have weighed your options, then good for you! When the Nay Sayers approach you, just change the subject. They will get the message, ESPECIALLY when you are post op and down 60 lbs! It does get to be very tireing (sp?) having to defend your decision to ignorant loved ones. Stay strong sister.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

thats what made me not tell anyone but my daughter until after, i know this is what i want but my older sister can sometimes talk me out or in to things, I want to do this for myself. and i dont need other people telling me , i should just diet.Ive tried, so for right now, my daughter is my support

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That comment sounds like it's coming from someone without much weight issues or someone who is jealous. You obviously didn't go into this haphazardly so stay strong in your decision.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Like today someone asked if I knew about the raw food diet. I told them yes and declined. Mind you, she is average size and I don't think was ever big. It's a little different when someone has experienced it first hand. Besides, WLS is a tool to help.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks! I'm standing firm with my decision. Been only telling close family, Coworkers and 2 friends who have had the surgery for that reason. Neither one of them have weight issues either.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It really pissed me off when people tried to talk me out of it too. My boss told me I was taking the easy way out. Here is a blog entry I wrote about it: http://jfabulous43.wordpress.com/2012/02/23/taking-the-easy-way-out/

Bottom line, don't listen to anyone but yourself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ugh I hate discouraging ppl. I had someone tell me I didn't need the surgery I could just loose weight. How can you look at how unhappy someone is and try to hinder them from making a change? Ehhh whatever is done is done for you. I dont care what anyone says, my mind is made up!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

People share their opinions for a lot of reasons: maybe they love you and they're scared (My Mom fell in this camp), maybe they are just clueless (every one who said 'Why don't you just diet' fell in this camp!), and some are just haters.

For those that love you, take the time to help them get over their fears, but stick to your guns! I took Mom to a support group meeting and she met my doctor too. She knew my heatlh was compromised because of my weight so that was already worrying her, so she was an easier sell on the operation. But she was still scared for me. I told her I had to weigh the risks of staying fat vs. having the operation and having the operation won.

For those that are clueless, if I cared enough about them I said "My Dr. and I have agreed this is the best option for me." No more discussion. If they kept on, I told them I didn't want to discuss it.

For haters, just ignore the suckers. They really are just jealous.

Best wishes on your journey!

Lynda

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know my mom will be such a hattttter! When I was smaller she gave me no words of encouragement. Occasionally she would say "that top looks nice," but it was almost like she didn't want to. She has issues with emotions. I was looking pretty good. God help her once I get down to that weight, minus sixty more, plus I'm cute.. Good grief. Sorry, just had to toot my own horn for a second. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My cousin and i have always been fat and fabulous together. Now that i have been sleeved she has become such a hater. Important only 2weeks in and have lost only 20lbs and she has started already. I finally had to lean on her and let her know that this was my decision and i don't care what her or anybody else thinks. I don't. Have to explain myself to anyone. I think she got the pic and apologized to me for being overly concerned as she called it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Every conversation I have with my mother is about a new diet or diet pill she saw on tv or someone at work is taking. It gets really frustrating. No one knows I'm having this. I'm going alone and I'm doing it for me! I'm so annoyed about how everyone else is such an expert on my body and my weight!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×