Not Sure Where To Post?

[Solo 0]

I'm new here. I'm 31, 5 ft tall, and over 100 lbs overweight. I feel self-concious, when I registered for my orientation, the employee looked at me and said, "others are going to look at you and think you don't belong here." Um, thanks? I meet all requirement, BMI over 40, recently diagnosed as a diabetic, on metformin and I have auto-immune hashimotos thyroiditis.

I'm doing this alone now... My husband was originally supportive, but now he tells me that I'm doing this dradtic thing, over-reacting and its unnecessary. If I wanted to lose weight, I just need to eat less, right? And of course, once I have this done, I can't eat my snack of Cereal. I'm not quite sure while he thinks cereal is important to me, but whatever.

I've had my psych shall and passed, and attended the orientation today. I have my consult with the surgeon and appt with the dietician on 3/29. I'm really excited, I hope to get things moving fast. I've lost 4 lbs in the last couple of months, simply by going to a gluten-free diet (because hof the hashimotos). Last week, I started going to the gym twice a week and I bought an elliptical to use at home. I estimate that ill have to lose approx 20 lbs, so hopefully it will be easily attainable.

Does anyone have any pointers? I'd like to say I have support... I have two friends whom I can talk to, bit they've never btdt.

Will I be allowed to drive home from the hospital? It requires an overnight stay, so I'll be over the anesthesia, bit I don't know if they will let me leave solo. At this point, I just can't count on my husband.

This is all over the place, so if you've followed me, thanks.

[iegal 460]

How exciting that you are moving forward, even with a percieved lack of support. Honey, if any of us could have lost weight permanently without VSG, then I would have gladly skipped surgery and not taken "the easy way out". Sounds like hubby might be scared for you or what will happen if....

Even having outpatient VSG - yes I was home that night in my own sweet bed, I still needed someone to drive me home. Make other plans, perhaps one of your friends?

My advice, stick with your plan, talk openly with hubby so as not to exclude him so he knows you are serious about taking care of yourself. When date of surgery gets closer, tell him what time you need to be there and what day you need to be picked up along with how much you need him. He needs support through this upcoming change too. Take him along to next appointment, bring home paperwork of what and how and why. Just don't ask for opinions because you already have his.

Chin up. I love my sleeve and have no regrets.

[kcage 33]

My husband was not very supportive at first either, but I just presented him with the facts. Fact I work a full time job and have 4 small children he is back in school at night gym.....yeah right! Fact thos will ease if not end health problems. Fact I am not asking for your agreement with my decision just your respect and you understanding this is what it is going to take to get me to the place I need to be health wise. I also told my husband I understand he reasoning for reservations, and I let him know that the fact that he didnt jump for joy at the thought of him having his skinnh wife back reassured me I married the right man. The same way you are worried and anxious so is he! Keep your head up and know you do have support we are all here for you. He will be there on surgery day.

[Larry Stuto 6]

Just the fact that obese people have stats that say you can lose 10-15 YEARS off your life span if you dont get the weight off. That alone put all the nopeople in my camp back on my side. Best of luck to you. The previous post is correct in my opinion. Just give hubby the facts!. You will be FINE!!!!! in that size 7.

[GEAUX SAINTS 143]

Definitely have to have a ride home & my hospital doesn't allow cabs. Hopefully, your husband will come around, but if he doesn't, you may need to depend on a friend. If you live in a big enough city, you could probably hire a sitter to drive you! Good luck!!!!

[Solo 0]

Thank you everyone. I had my consult with the surgeon, appointment with the dietitian and meeting with the surgery coordinator to be given my list of "to-do's".

My doc is on board, willing to do the sleeve, though he has more experience with the bypass. Still, his personal success rate is fantastic, not to mention Kaiser's overall averages. The dietitian was impressed with my diet thus far, though I still have a way to go. Because I'm gluten free, I am limited on the amount of "junk" I can eat, though my portions are distorted still.

I went to my appointments alone. When I got home, my husband didn't ask about my appointments. He still hasn't, five days later. I've come to the conclusion that I'm going to be going through this alone. I have three friends I've confided in about this journey, two of whom live out of state and the other always says she'll be there, but when it comes down to it, she isn't.

Because my surgery is an hour and a half away from home, I won't be able to hire a driver. I'm not sure what I'll do - I may end up having to talk to my doctor about it and seeing what my options are. I suppose I could do public transportation, like buses and BART - but then, it's only going to get me as far as 40 minutes from home.

I'm not going to let this discourage me, but I won't lie - it makes me sad. I honestly don't think he's concerned about me, you'd have to know him to understand. A little over a year ago, I had an open biopsy for a lump on my breast. The doctor ended up needing to remove more tissue than originally planned, so the surgery took longer than she thought. When my husband came in the recovery room to help me get dressed, he was extremely irritated and pissy with me, because it took longer than he was told it would. I think it's all an extreme inconvenience for him and it's a shame.

Again, I'm sad, but it won't discourage me. I will figure it out, I just need time to think about it.

[Solo 0]

Sorry for posting so close together, but I've been doing some research.

I don't know why it took me so long to figure out the obvious. I can take a cab from the hospital to the BART station ( a few miles), where I can take the ACE rail train to my town. Then I can take a cab to my house, just a few miles away.

I would think it should cost me under $50, not bad - and I don't have to worry about people flaking out on me.

[DisappearingDivis 36]

I'm so sorry for the hoops you have to jump through Solo. I was wondering where you live (State & city)?

[Solo 0]

I'm in Manteca, CA. But, my surgery will take place at Kaiser in Fremont, CA.

[DinaMiller6450 20]

It is very hard for me to tell if my husband is with me or against me. He said that he would pay for the surgery. But I think he has reservations. I'm not sure if he even wants to be there the day of the surgery, and to be honest I'm not sure I want him to be there. I would rather wait till after 2 weeks post-op. He works offshore, so I have been thinking about scheduling while he is offshore for his 2 weeks. He seems to be worried that something might happen to me during or after the surgery. I have given him all the facts. The facts of what could happen if I DO NOT HAVE THE SURGERY. I think he understands. I think he will come around after all is said and done. I do have support from my daughter who will be 18 on the 29th. She is amazing. She wants to stay with me at the hospital and she will drive me home. I just hope that my husband comes around because I'm not changing my mind. I am tired of feeling bad everyday. I'm tired of my back and legs hurting everyday. I want to be healthy and happy again. I know I can do this. I will do this!!!!!!!!! I will lose the Weight!!!!!!

[Almostthere34 128]

I wish I lived near you. I would pick you up and drop you off at home. It doesn't sound right to have to go through the surgery and not have his support. I think you should tell him to pick you up. You need to be accompanied for safety purposes. Maybe you could join a local support group. I am sure someone would be willing to take you home.