Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

A Letter To Myself The Night Before Surgery- Written 1 Year Ago



Recommended Posts

It is hard to believe that it has been over a year since I had my sleeve surgery. I was sleeved on February 23, 2011. I was convinced that I would be the one to die during surgery or to fail after having it done. The night before, I wrote myself a letter to open on the 1 year anniversary, in the event that I survived the procedure. I put off opening that letter for a couple weeks because I knew how emotional I would feel reading it. I just opened it today, and I thought I would share it with everyone. Here is a letter to myself written 2/22/11:

Krista- If you are reading this, then you made it through surgery & the first year. Hopefully, you are healthier & happier. I just want to remind you of all the reasons you did the surgery & hopefully none of them apply any more. Today, my hope for the future is:

1. To no longer fearful of being humiliated every time I go in public by someone pointing, laughing, or saying something horrible to me.

2. To no longer afraid that a child I am working with will ask me why I'm so fat, which has happened several times since I became a librarian.

3. To not be afraid I'll break a chair when I sit.

4. To not dread restaurant booths because I can only fit in about half of them.

5. To be able to climb stairs without getting winded.

6. To not dread flying; fearing the seat belt won't fit or having the person seated next to me roll their eyes & sigh when they see me.

7. To be able to wear shorts without embarrassment.

8. To not be embarrassed to have someone hug me or touch me, knowing they are feeling all my fat.

9. To be able to swim & enjoy the Water.

10. To go on a date and really be able to believe that someone could like or love me.

I feel like this list could go on forever. I only hope that if I am reading this letter, my life has improved & I'm not regretting having had this surgery. I hope I am really able to love myself and the anger I feel towards the world & how it treats me is gone.

Krista

I'm happy to say that all the hopes for my future have more or less come true. There are a few things I am still working on. I'm still about 20 pounds from my final goal, which I take full responsibility for. I have been slacking the past month & need to get back on track. I still don't like wearing shorts or swimming suits, but that is largely because of the loose skin & am dealing with & not because I feel fat. I feel like my life has improved so much from the time that I wrote that letter. It is better than I could have hoped for. Don't get me wrong, it is still not perfect & I still deal with low self-esteem and other issues. But I'm no longer miserable just because I exist. I don't hate how I look or hate having people look at me. I don't avoid photos or going out with friends. I feel like I am finally living a normal life & I am happy with that. I hope all of you can or will soon be able to say the same.

I couldn't figure out how to attach before & after pictures, so here is the link to my album: http://www.verticalsleevetalk.com/gallery/album/1509-krista-before-1-year-pictures/

Krista

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That is so inspiring. Thank you for sharing. I'm having my revision to Vgs in May and I'm going to do the same thing. You are truly an inspiration. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Congratulations on your success! I'm sure you will get to your goal. What a great idea to write yoursefl a letter. We all need little reminders to stay on track.

Thanks for sharing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What a very smart thing to do (writing yourself a letter). You have done great on your journey 110lbs is awesome. Congrats and best wishes for your continued success.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you for sharing your letter all of those reasons you listed rang so close to my heart as well. Only 6 days after my surgery I appreciate reading your past and seeing your present results.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, I just upload some before photos & some 1 year photos. I couldn't figure out how to attach them to my post, so I created an album. Hopefully the link will work.

http://www.verticalsleevetalk.com/gallery/album/1509-krista-before-1-year-pictures/

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What an awesome idea! I intend to borrow the idea from you as well because although I have made it through several surgeries the concern that this time might result differently is there of course. One thing that struck me when I was reading your post was that I have been diligent in preparing such as: Making sure the following documents are handy: Will, Medical Power of Attorney, HIPPA Release Authorization, Advance Directive. But, what I had failed to think about is that although I know that my children know how much I love them, how much they mean to me and how very proud I am of them, I should still write them letters too, in case the worst case scenario happens and I fall into that <1% category!

Since surgery is Monday, guess I better get to writing!

Thank you for sharing!!

weight.png

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Krista,

Thanks so much for sharing your story! Happy Belated-Sleevisversary to you! You look fabulous! If you haven't already, come join us in the <30 to goal group. That last 20 is the hardest!

Lynda

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That is a great idea! So glad to hear that you are close to goal and feeling much better about life in general. You look like a new healthier and happier person and that is amazing!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your letter brought me to tears! What a great idea! I am 6 weeks out,but am still pondering on writing a letter to myself now that I read yours. =) We had similar stats! I am 5'3" highest weight was 269,weight on day of surgery was 254,and I am now 228. You look great and have done an awesome job!! An inspiration to myself and others I'm sure! ((HUGS))

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What an incredibly emotional and touching letter and I love the idea of writing it to yourself and opening it one year later. I remember having the same fear you did - This sudden and horrible fear right before surgery that something would go wrong and I wouldn't live through it. I kept saying, "If I just wake up and survive the surgery, I will be able to handle anything else that comes with this VSG journey."

I loved the before and after pics too! You look amazing and I'm really happy for you! Congratulations!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Beautiful letter! I was so touched reading it. You should be very proud of your accomplishments! I am only 5 days out and I want to tell you that you are an inspiration to me!!! Bless You! Melanie:)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It is hard to believe that it has been over a year since I had my sleeve surgery. I was sleeved on February 23' date=' 2011. I was convinced that I would be the one to die during surgery or to fail after having it done. The night before, I wrote myself a letter to open on the 1 year anniversary, in the event that I survived the procedure. I put off opening that letter for a couple weeks because I knew how emotional I would feel reading it. I just opened it today, and I thought I would share it with everyone. Here is a letter to myself written 2/22/11:

Krista- If you are reading this, then you made it through surgery & the first year. Hopefully, you are healthier & happier. I just want to remind you of all the reasons you did the surgery & hopefully none of them apply any more. Today, my hope for the future is:

1. To no longer fearful of being humiliated every time I go in public by someone pointing, laughing, or saying something horrible to me.

2. To no longer afraid that a child I am working with will ask me why I'm so fat, which has happened several times since I became a librarian.

3. To not be afraid I'll break a chair when I sit.

4. To not dread restaurant booths because I can only fit in about half of them.

5. To be able to climb stairs without getting winded.

6. To not dread flying; fearing the seat belt won't fit or having the person seated next to me roll their eyes & sigh when they see me.

7. To be able to wear shorts without embarrassment.

8. To not be embarrassed to have someone hug me or touch me, knowing they are feeling all my fat.

9. To be able to swim & enjoy the Water.

10. To go on a date and really be able to believe that someone could like or love me.

I feel like this list could go on forever. I only hope that if I am reading this letter, my life has improved & I'm not regretting having had this surgery. I hope I am really able to love myself and the anger I feel towards the world & how it treats me is gone.

Krista

I'm happy to say that all the hopes for my future have more or less come true. There are a few things I am still working on. I'm still about 20 pounds from my final goal, which I take full responsibility for. I have been slacking the past month & need to get back on track. I still don't like wearing shorts or swimming suits, but that is largely because of the loose skin & am dealing with & not because I feel fat. I feel like my life has improved so much from the time that I wrote that letter. It is better than I could have hoped for. Don't get me wrong, it is still not perfect & I still deal with low self-esteem and other issues. But I'm no longer miserable just because I exist. I don't hate how I look or hate having people look at me. I don't avoid photos or going out with friends. I feel like I am finally living a normal life & I am happy with that. I hope all of you can or will soon be able to say the same.

I couldn't figure out how to attach before & after pictures, so here is the link to my album: http://www.verticalsleevetalk.com/gallery/album/1509-krista-before-1-year-pictures/

Krista[/quote']

Thank you for sharing. You made me cry. I think a lot of us felt the same way (and still do). You have come a long way since last year. Even though I didn't write myself a letter I remember feeling the the same way. First couple weeks before surgery I thought I might not make it through surgery but even with that in mind I knew I had to do it. I wasn't living life for some time and really wanted a new healthier, happier me. So I did it and here I am. Made it through surgery. I know that my life will be completely different next year. I too will post a similar story like yours. Thank you so much for sharing your personal feelings and your great transformation!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow, you look amazing, like a totally different person! Thank you for sharing and what a great idea. I'm going to write a letter to self too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • rinabobina

      I would like to know what questions you wish you had asked prior to your duodenal switch surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×