How Did I Get To This Point?

[Louisiana Girl 14]

I'm not sure if this is where I start the posts. This is my first time starting a group.

My BMI was 34 when I had my surgery. How did I get to this point? I never had to worry about my weight when I was younger. And I'm talking 15 years ago. At 44 yrs old. Then, I started paying less attention to what I was putting in my mouth, and not exercising. I knew that I was putting on weight, but never really saw myself as big as I was. Clothes got tighter, but I kept saying "I'll start my diet Monday". Then Monday came, and I felt deprived if I couldn't eat the foods I wanted. My comforting friend. I couldn't lose that friend. I could lose 20 lbs, but only to put them back on. My motivation faded whenever there was an opportunity to go out and eat and drink with friends. We are social people. So here I am now -----needing to lose 60 lbs. But I decided to do something for myself, for me! I know this is drastic, but necessary.

[Finding Myself 146]

I am RIGHT THERE with you! I keep questioning my own sanity for even considering this, but the reality is I've failed every time I've tried - call it laziness or lack of willpower or whatever - but I see this as a tool to help me succeed. Where are you gonna go for surgery?? I'm so glad to find this group!!!!

[Louisiana Girl 14]

I had my surgery on January 18, 2012. So, I am about three months out now. I do remember thinking that I must have been crazy to do this. It does require a little work, but the sleeve is a tool, not the whole answer. Because they remove the fundus gland that produces a hormone that tells you when you are hungry, I am never hungry. When you get the Protein in, it helps you feel satisfied, and makes this journey easier. Granted, I still head crave certain foods that use to be my comfort food, but then I think about this gift I have given myself, and what got me here in the first place. I don't weigh myself at home, but have probably lost close to 30 lbs. So, it is working for me. And believe me, I absolutely never thought I could do this.

[Finding Myself 146]

Oh goodness I can't believe I missed that! Where did you have your surgery??? Are you happy so far? How was recovery??

[gettinthinner 4]

I was so tired of dieting and losing the same 30 lbs and never ever getting to a thin me, even with the dieting. After so many years of this behaviour I decided I would gain weight to be sure I qualified for the surgery. I know this sounds absolutely crazy and I suppose very desperate. But I was feeling desperate. It was so easy to gain the weight because I was very tired of fighting the gain for so many years. I had to face the many negative comments from friends and family who said I didn't need to lose weight. But I knew I did. I got up to almost 200 which I have been off and on many times. Now how can anyone say that isn't overweight at 5'4 and according to all charts. But friends and family continued to tell me I was crazy to undergo such surgery.

What I have discovered since having surgery is that it was absolutely the best choice I have made. Perhaps it is drastic but my health has improved sooo much and my bp, cholesterol, sugar levels, etc. are all way, way down compared to when I was on prescriptions meds for those conditions. Now no meds at all since surgery and those much lower, normal levels.

I have finally figured out that this is something we do for ourselves, to feel better about ourselves and to improve our health. I still feel uncomfortable about letting people know I had surgery, because I met with such disapproval. My big lesson learned so far is that I have to do things for myself and to feel good about myself. it is time for me to take care of myself and my own needs and stop being "just" a wife and mother. It is ME time. It sounds a bit pathetic but it has taken me to age 55 to realize that I can do something that is for myself and not for anyone else. Time to look at my own wants and needs. I deserve better health, and I deserve to look good. I feel a lot better about myself now. I have to work on the idea of getting exercise but at least I can say that I now have a spring in my step.

[Louisiana Girl 14]

I am also 5'4" and felt every extra pound. I think anybody who has put on 60-100 extra pounds, will certainly not think it's crazy. Only those who can't understand the ups and downs of being overweight. How we feel about ourselves. How we, whether right or wrong, compare ourselves to others. Since my surgery, I have made so many changes; in my health and in how I feel about myself. Drastic - yes; Crazy - No! I am also to the age (59) where I feel it is time I did more than just want to be thinner and healthier. More than just exercise. More than just watching what I eat. Because just that didn't work for me. It took drastic! But happy about my decision. Good luck to all who decide to go this route. I believe you will not regret it either.

[boots321 42]

Weight Watchers, Atkins, HCG, Diet pills, Nutrasystem, Sugar Busters, Slimfast......are just a few of the diets I have tried over and over for YEARS!!! At 5'4" , 44 years old and 200 lbs it was time to take a different dirrection! I scheduled my surgery for May 31st in TJ Mexico. Drastic - YES!!!

So, tell me ladies....how are you doing? Do you still get hungry? Complications?

Boots in Houston

[Finding Myself 146]

Boots who is doing your surgery? I'm scheduled with Dr. Kelly on June 14th.

I am just under 5'3 and weigh on average 187 lbs. People are CONSTANTLY telling me, "you look fine!" "You don't need to lose weight!"

Baloney. I see the fat rolls around my midsection. True... I am not morbidly obese. I am simply... obese. Discount the BMI and all that, say it's not accurate... still, I should weigh no more than about 130 lbs. How can people not see that????

I find it very frustrating. I know this is only a tool and may not work for me. I plan for it to work though, and in my mind I just don't envision it NOT working. I'm being positive. I'm being proactive. And, I'm sick and tired of being a size 16 when I know I should be a size 7 or 8.

I'm so glad I found this group!!! Most people on here seem to be morbidly obese and I think they wonder why we are doing this, too. Maybe that's just my own head saying that, too. I have a friend who lost about 60 on her own, then needed to lose 60 more and just got sleeved. So she was my size after losing a lot of weight and then got sleeved to finish it off... she has never been happier.

My body has stayed at my current weight for YEARS. I want to feel better about myself, too.

[boots321 42]

I'm with ya FindingMyself!!! I am going to TJ to see Dr. Almanza on May 31st. My BFF is going with me. She probably weighs 110lbs soaking wet and has told me over and over that I'm not fat...I look fine...I don't need surgery. It honestly infuriates me to no end! I love her but...seriously...how can a "skrawwwny" chick like that say such a thing?

I'm 5'4 and weigh 200lbs. Been wearing a 2x to 3x for a long time and I just keep going up! I have held on to those old jeans for years hoping I could fit into them again. I have tried every diet out there and had success with some only to goin it back + some when it's all said and done!

I would love, love, love to see 125lbs again! To be able to go shopping and look GOOD in those new cloths instead of a cow in a moo-moo would be FANTASTIC!!!

Boots in Houston

[Finding Myself 146]

That's so funny, just this last weekend I got on the scale and I've been semi low carbing it for about a week or two, and I've lost a couple of pounds... made me feel good, you know? Then I got dressed and worse a nice pair of capris and a nice blouse, looked at myself in the mirror and was like MY GOD I want this weight off!!!!

Yes I was just talking to a friend of mine, too, who was telling me the same things... she's tiny.. and I looked at her and told her that what she isn't taking into account is that she and I are the same height, she weighs about 120 lbs. I told her that I am HER size if I'm healthy and she just stared at me. People don't really grasp that 50 or 60 lbs really is REALLY overweight.

I'm lucky in that I have this opportunity NOW instead of waiting until I get diabetes or high bp or whatever... right now I am somewhat pre-diabetic in that my fasting blood glucose is elevated. So I can sit back, keep this extra 50-60 lbs and WAIT till I get sick or try to do something about it now!!

Fingers crossed that surgery goes off without a hitch and that I can lose this weight and enjoy my remaining "young" years being active and healthy, and not enter seniorhood as a fatty that's developing disease.

Somebody on here said, "you ever seen a healthy, fat older person? Yeah, cause they don't exist." That stays with me!!!!

[boots321 42]

@ Findeing Myself....that is so true! Border line diabetic is just around the corner for me! I gave up smoking almost a week ago so I'm hoping that will help the shortness of breath! I travel a lot all over the world and lately I am finding its extremely hard to lug my computer case and the roll around luggage while traveling. I have to stop and catch my breath in the middle of the airport. What gives??? Well....that would be the unhealthy weight I have put on in the past 10 years! I feel like I look like a beached whale in ANYTHING I put on nowdays! Reality finally sank in when I took my "BEFORE" pics and uploaded a little while ago.....GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can usually hide some of that fat under clothes. Not now.....I bared it all baby! You can't even see by undie bottoms from the front view cause of my gut hanging over!!! YUCK!!!

THIS HAS TO BE THE ANSWER TO MY PRAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Finding Myself 146]

I took pre op pics, too, and we look similar except that you carry more in your gut and I carry more in my gut and thighs - I am not brave enough to post pics!!! LOL But I still hate those pics and I even took one where I was "lifting" the fat roll up off my panties. Arrgh!

[boots321 42]

Yeah, not a pretty sight for sure! I also seem to carry a lot of weight in my upper body. My arms are huge. The pics didnt do them justice at all! I am so embarrassed to wear sleevless shirts now!!! I live in Texas though and it gets so hot here you have to!!!

Booking our flights to San Diego tonight! I am SOOOO excited! I'm not taking too much time off from work. I work from home a lot so I'm hoping I will be able to sit at the computer in less than a week. We shall see!

[Louisiana Girl 14]

Well, it's been about four months since my surgery. I have lost about 45 lbs and have had to go out and buy new clothes. What a glorious day it was, trying on my old clothes, and throwing them in the "get rid of" pile. I still have about 20 lbs to lose, so I only bought a couple of pieces as I need them. Those are even getting loose on me. But I'm smiling! I'm even starting to like the way I look. Granted, I have a little loose skin. But I'd rather loose skin than the fat. That had to be one of the best presents I gave to myself! Loving my sleeve!

[boots321 42]

You go girl!!! So proud of you for throwing out your fat clothes and buy new skinny clothes!!!! I believe in a year or two, after all my fat is gone I will have some plastic surgery to get rid of the skin I'll have!!! Wanna go on the buddy system???

I am so pumped about my surgery in 12 MORE DAYS!!!! Been stocking up on protien powders and unjury. Starting a semi hard core diet today and then the final 2 shakes per day + salad next week. I have to say, I have been eating everything under the sun for the past week! It's almost like a farewell party for all those greasy, yummy, off limit kinda foods and I have not been able to stop! Maybe also partly cause I quit smoking and this keeps me busy. Anywho....today, all that changes!