Band Vs. Sleeve - Freaked Out...

[SashaWLS 412]

I was SURE I was going to get the sleeve. There are 100 reasons from the ghrelin elimination to not wanting a foreign body in me, to hearing horror stories about the band, and the list goes on... But the surgeon today really really strongly advises getting the band for the safety ratings, and he's talked me out of getting the sleeve...

But now I'm home, and I'm sitting here crying. It feels irrational, but I'm so scared that I won't be successful. That I'll get surgery and just continue to be a big fat failure at losing weight just like I always have been. So many people say they stop losing or gain it all back. And I just don't trust myself to muscle through it. I don't WANT to be on Weight Watchers again. I already lost 75 pounds and gained it back. I don't WANT to never be able to eat rice again. But I really really don't want to be fat anymore.

I don't know what to do... I don't have the right to put my life at risk and get a surgery where I could have major life complications.

It all just feels hopeless.

Have you been where I am?