Are You Telling People That Your Having This Surgery?

[Nance 4]

I've told all family and friends. I just didn't want to get the infamous "wow, you've lost so much weight...how did you do it?" to come up. Then I'd have to decided to tell them or not. For me it was just easier to tell everyone so they expect to see me slim down and not have to question it. Luckily, no one has given me the stink eye about it. Everyone has been supportive, thank goodness.

[janerose 109]

I posted it on Facebook right after christmas - I was shocked by the amound of support from everyone - I am so glad I did; I am not ashamed - hopefuly I can help someone else find some help!

[Amanda 3.0 140]

I told a few people. I did not tell my parents, since we don't talk anyway. My brother happened to call just before surgery so I told him. He was quite supportive, which was nice.

I have had a few people tell me that I wasn't big enough for the surgery, or question the necessity. I just let them say what they needed to say, and thanked them. The decision is made already and no real discussion was necessary.

If people ask how I lost weight, and I don't feel that it is their business, I will just tell them I am eating less. That is the truth, after all.

These forums are great. We don't have to be blindsided by unexpected comments and judgments, since people here have heard it all!

[JMarshall 352]

I told everyone about it. My friends and family have seen me struggle with this for a while and when i told them they all were supportive. i told my co-workers and there were supportive also. i have no regrets about my decision and if someone doesn't like it that's there problem. It does help that i work with alot of guys that have the same problem as i do. another co-worker is thinking about the surgery now that he has seen me do it.

[Deigh 15]

I told my coworkers and honestly the worst reaction I've had has been from one coworker who is also heavy and another friend who is heavy. The coworker has made it her business to watch everything I eat, comment on it, and then compare her "diet success" to me on a regular basis. For example, she just called to tell me she's lost another 3 lbs in two weeks. That's great but I don't want to compete with her and I hate feeling like I'm under a microscope around her. I can't say anything, though, as she ones of those people who thrives on drama and conflict and I hate that.

As for my friend, she was very negative about the surgery and when I said something to her, she said it's because she worries I'll try to make her have it. I said that it was a decision I came to after many years of considering it and I wouldn't try to rush or even sell her on it. It's her choice to make. I'm careful to not comment on how awesome it is and she's careful to not be negative. I think we'll pull through this time with a solid friendship because under it all, I love her and she loves me. I think she was scared of how I would react to her not wanting the surgery and I wanted her to be excited for me about something she doesn't believe in. I can remember feeling that way when another friend of mine had the bypass and I knew it wasn't for me.

It's funny, my friend who was so negative is the one I feel the most comfortable calling and saying, "Holy crap, I just tried to eat X and boy did my sleeve let me know that wasn't a good move." She's the one I call to complain that the liquid diet has made me want to chew on people like a rabid dog. I think because I know she isn't looking for it all to be golden, I feel free to tell her when it's a really sucky sleeve day. I sent her a note the other day thanking her for this.

Only you know how the people around you will react. I work in an office of eight people. I had no choice but to tell them. If I had a choice, I probably would have waited until I did it and told them after because it would have saved me the months of drama my competitive coworker created. The other side of that is, all the drama preop made me realize I can't control her and if she wants to sit and be a witch, then that's her problem. I ignore her now and try to just not talk about it if she's around. If she brings up how much she's lost and wants to know my numbers, I tell her I have a long way to go and I would rather focus on how I feel and not how much I weigh. If she pushes, I walk away without answering.

[Catracks 865]

At first I only told my parents, husband, kids and my husband's ex (yeah, we're friends). Everyone was cool except for my mother who wigged out. Now just through word of mouth just about everyone knows. Hell, my daughter told her friends.

The only people who don't know are my boss and co-workers. They only know I'm having some sort of surgery.

[LGoz 4]

I did not tell anyone (my husband and my mother know) I have looked into this andd the lab-band for 3 years. I dd

I did not tell anyone except my hubby.... so far so good

[Karen B45 38]

I am having surgery in March and have told pretty much everyone. I told my boss and coworkers because I will be away from work for two weeks, and in case I need them to be a little understanding when I do return to work...and I have told everyone else close to me so that they are aware. I guess for me it's as much about having to have someone watch my six year old son and help me with him when I get home (single mom). I can see both sides, but for me I am a really open person and it's just easier for me if people are aware. Some people are negative, like my vanpool, one of the people in there told me I should be worried about them harvesting my organs (I am having surgery in Mexico). It's like anything else, you can't control other people, and you have to do what you are comfortable with. But negative people are just....ugh. Annoying.

[Shells 40]

The only people who know are my parents, brother and sister. My manager and coworkers know that I am getting surgery but I think they think I have some sort of disease to get rid of. I just haven't said no so whatever they think it is, I really don't care I just say I'll be back in 5 weeks better and healed! They'll forget eventually and I keep saying I don't want to talk about it.

[juli916 6]

I was choosy about who to tell also, but I really don't understand the need to lie or make up a story. This is hard work too, certainly not easy. And if it works, then it was the right choice, so be proud.

I am starting a new job next week I have a little anxiety about not only being the "new girl" but also the weird one who can't eat anything.

[circa 333]

My husband and one of my siblings know and that's it. Well, and you guys Those are the only people that are being told.

[PEvette 297]

I told all of my family and only a few close friends.....some are supportive, I have family who still asks me every once in a while if I am still planning to do it (my date is in June 2012) my close friends asks questions and understand why I desire to do this (to live a healthy life and have a family) and I only asked them not to share it with others, so far their lips have been sealed...

[andersonlj 32]

I only told those in my immediate circle of friends and my immediate family. I figured that I might get enough push back from them and did not need the extra hassle with the upcoming surgery. Most of my friends and family supported my decision that I told and now that others know that I have had the surgery and have seen the change in me in just a month they are happy and very supportive of me.

[lyndynojo 140]

I tell anyone who sits still long enough. Lol. I found out about the surgery from a friend who had it and can never thank her enough. Since my surgery 6/24 I've lost over 70 lbs and my cousin just had the surgery and 2 other friends are getting it also because they've seen how well I have done. I love that I have helped people that have the same issues I have.

[firstday 7]

Let me tell you about my experience today with my internal medicine dr. I started my pre op diet Monday but I'm now having some sort of upper respiratory infection. I went to see what could be done. I told him I was having the vertical sleeve done. He looked at me and told me he really didn't think I was 'that' big. I told him I just couldn't get rid of the extra weight. He told me if I could do a pre- op diet, I should be able to do the entire thing. I had to explain to this dr that I have been on every diet he could think of in the past 30 years and have been successful on some of them however could not keep it off. He went on to tell me that this surgery didn't guarantee me to keep it off either. Anyway, he gave me a rx for antibiodics and I got out of there...... I guess I'll have to show him!