Losing My Groove

[emmas mom 4]

hey guys! i am having a hard time sticking to the rules lately, i basically binged on cheeze its. my 2 yr old kept feeding them to me and the more i wanted, 2 days in a row. then my husband put a bowl of crackers and dip next to me and i kept eating them. i didnt even feel full. i cant say no. my husband is not supportive food or exercise wise and i battle with myself what to eat and what not to eat. I am having a really hard time getting back on track. my husband cooked dinner the other day and fried chicken, tonight fried sausage patties, which i skipped since i ate a ton of cheeze its and crackers. to be honest i am not a cook or meal planner and struggle with healthy choices. plus it doesnt help that i have been more hungry lately, been able to eat much more and have been craving salt and sweet foods. my appetite and cravings are changing back to old habbits and i am getting upset. any advice would be great! thanks and happy yew year!

[Indymom 132]

I found myself falling into old habits during the holidays - I am not a sweets person but LOVE crunchy, salty Snacks (so I overdid it on crackers/dip, ranch dressing oyster cracker Snacks, etc.). I had to just put the brakes on and get back to basics.

A lot of people are doing Diva's boot camp (see the pinned thread at the top of this page) and getting back to early post-op habits.

I think the only way to get back on track is to KEEP track . . . of what you're eating, how much you're exercising, etc. Did you previously use an online food tracker like myfitnesspal? If not, I would really recommend it. If you're having a hard time with the carbs, you probably need to eliminate the bad carbs for a few days to break the cycle.

I would talk to your husband about being more supportive - it would really frustrate me if my husband wasn't helping me with my journey.

Good luck to you!

[DebiC 181]

I haven't let things go quite as bad, but have had a few minor issues. I have ended up just throwing out the food that was causing me problems.

But that doesn't solve the husband/dinner/meal problems. Sabotage is very common. Not just with WLS surgery but any type of change a spouse makes. The person fears that if their spouse changes, that they won't love them any more or that the relationship will suffer. Unfortunately, this really does happen sometimes.

Can you talk to your husband about this. Maybe you two can work together on some meal plans? These meals aren't healthy for your child(ren) in the long run.

I know exactly what it's like to have a non supportive husband. That's part of why I kept my weight on for sooo long. He's not around now and I am only surrounded by supportive family and friends.

I don't have a solution for you, other than to find a way to put matters in your control. Your child will not die if you don't buy him/her treats that also appeal to you. Find some healthier Snacks or Snacks he likes but not you.

Fix your own dinners if you have to and let your husband continue to cook for himself and the family. There are a lot of simple things you could cook. Even just buying lean cuisine type meals, while not the best option, would still be better than eating fried chicken and sausage.

If you need some ideas for super easy things you can prepare for yourself, check out eggface's website, look through the forums or please contact me and I will be happy to help you come up with some ideas.

I don't want to see you fail after all the hard work it took to get this far. And especially while you are so young. I hate to see anybody stay big for as long as I did because they didn't know how to make it work.

Best of luck to you.

[Dooter 1,457]

Hold out your left hand. Go on. Do it. Hold it out. Ok, now SMACK it with your right hand!! Bad girl!! BAD!! No crackers!! Go eat some carrots! JUST SAY NO!!! This is not an option! You've had irreversible surgery!

This has been your "tough love interlude." You may return to your regularly scheduled activities...

Oh..no no no...DON'T CRY!!!! I was just being funny. (Tough, but funny!)

....and tell that man to stop putting big ol' stumbling blocks next to your snacking hand! I'll say a prayer for you

[brol1k 50]

im 7 months post op, I binge once a week on wheat thin crackers only b/c I was advised to by my practitioner, I was off bread/rice/pasta/potato/corn/chips/crackers etc.. since may and I told my NP that ive been feeling cranky and getting annoyed very easily. She had me email her a page from my food diary so she can see what im eating daily. next day she called me back telling me I need carbs, she advised a cup of Fiber one Cereal or a few wheat non salted crackers with some almond butter. After eating some crackers I noticed I took a slice of wheat bread with turkey and low fat cheese and smacked a tad of low fat mayo and ate it of course feeling full after, then next day the same, and day after the same till my Girlfriend of 7 years came to me and said "hey babe, ive been watching you and its 3 days in a row your eating bread, get control again please!"

with that I brought myself back down to earth and two weeks later Im back on my routine again, thank god for people like her b/c I was eating bread kinda w/o knowing being bread/sandwich's were my biggest weakness so I was falling back to old and BAD habits! Say no to old/Bad habits and please take your husband with you to your meeting with your NUT if he does go then make everyone in the house eat healthy and dont buy crackers n bread n chips, in fact skip that whole aisle in the supermarket like I do and along with juice n soda aisle lol

[dominique 34]

You may not be able to get your husband to come around. He fact that he is sabatoging you shows his fear of losing you. Which means you'll have to reach inside of you and pull out something that will make you put forth more effort to handle this. You'll have to reassure him more. I know, going through this surgery is hard enough without having this thrown at you. It isn't fair. One thing you can do is change your child's Snacks as was suggested. Then break things down and figure out what you can control, what you have power over. It's your body.

[thebionicbroad 127]

My mother gave me my favorite Christmas treat. I threw it out. Just because she gave it to me, doesn't mean that I have to eat it, right?

[SuperMom 33]

I have noticed that if I don't get my Protein in during the day at work....at night at home I want to nibble. When I went back to eating enough Protein I don't nibble as much??????????

Are you getting enough protein??

[SKCUNNINGHAM 298]

Here comes some more tough love.

You are 100% responsible for your success for failure with the sleeve. Not your two year old, not your husband (whether he is supportive or not). You need to step up and be accountable for your behaviors. Sounds like to me you may not be committeed to changing the things in your environment that will help you succeed. Here are some examples of things from your post:

1) Why are you letting your 2 year old eat cheezits in the first place? Why are there cheezits in the house? They aren't good for any one at any age - they are empty calories with little or no nutritive value. Get rid of them. If your husband insists on junk food in the house, get a big tin (like popcorn comes in) put all the junk food inside and tell him he needs to get it for himself if he wants to eat it. You don't handle it anymore. In fact, you could make him buy it for himself.

2) If your two year old hands you something you can't eat, take it from him, tell him thankyou - and then distract him with something else. Pick him up in the air, tickle him, something to get his mind off of feeding mom.

3) If your husband set down dip and chip next to you - either you move or move the food to his other side out of your reach.

4) You say you aren't a cook or a food planner. If you really want to be successful long term, you probably want to change both of these. Letting someone else be in charge of your food is asking for trouble.

Pull up those big girl panties and get back on track!

And, it sounds like you need to have some serious discussions with your husband. Does he not want you to lose weight? If so, why is that? You have certainly gone to a lot of trouble, made life-long changes to your body, and spent major $$ to let your husband a a helpless two year old be ruling your life as far as your food choices go.

I don't mean to be harsh or non-supportive - but you need to stop what you are doing. I have ruined my own success 4 different times in my life with not being accoutable for my own choices and behaviours. That is not happening to me this time - no matter what or who in my life is being a barrier to my success.

Good luck.

Sharon

[christin 54]

One thing you posted that I can relate to is not being much of a cook or meal planner. That has been part of my failure up until this moment of having surgery. That just has to change for both of us. We are totally responsible for what we prepare and what goes into our mouth whether anyone around us supports those changes or not.

I am planning to work very hard at planning and learning to cook for my new lifestyle. I know it won't be easy to change those habits, but I think that is a big part of this journey.

[DebiC 181]

Sharon-You do sound harsh-but you are also RIGHT on! Good advice for ALL of us. Sometimes we all need some Tough Love to keep us on track.

It may not be what we want to hear-sometimes we want to be coddled. But coddling ourselves too much is what got us to this point.

So Emma's mom-These may not have been the answers you hoped for-But we are all here to support you. We all want you to succeed, just as much as we want to succeed ourselves.

Please let us know how you decide to deal with this and how it works out for you.