Support System After Vsg

[jasleeve 440]

i am 5 days post op. physically, im good! getting down my liquids. maybe not as much as im supposed to but itsa work in progress. im not taking in Protein because the shakes are just gross! i know... i know! but im being honest. i do plan on experimenting on powders? utm_source=BariatricPal&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=CommentLink" target="_ad" data-id="1" >unjury soon. i do laps around my livingroom coffee table to help with gas.

but emotionally, im down! i feel like im complaining all the time & i hate it but its because im so emotional. my usual "friends" barely call or text me. i do have sleeve supporters & im grateful but its not the same. i have my mom here but shes more to herself which leaves me to myself!

pre-op, i always read that you need a support system & i never understood it! i always felt like people were just too emotional & just needed to go lay down & take a nap some where! but now... im definitely feeling it!!!! this is an emotional part of this journey that in no way was i prepared for!

but im coping!

sorry, just wanted to vent.

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

It's difficult for people around this season, but it also sounds like you might have an underlying depression going on. It would be a great idea to call you surgeon and check with him about feeling down. We care about you and want you to have the best care possible. Merry Christmas...

[jasleeve 440]

i do but surgery has intesified it for sure.

It's difficult for people around this season, but it also sounds like you might have an underlying depression going on. It would be a great idea to call you surgeon and check with him about feeling down. We care about you and want you to have the best care possible. Merry Christmas...

[Dooter 1,457]

With women, EVERYthing seems to have an effect on estrogen levels. Age, weight gain, weight loss, the earth revolving around the sun . So, I'm guessing surgery and weight loss you've experienced before and after and the gravity of the permanent change in your body and your life.......just....might make one emotional and any changes in estrogen are going to exacerbate this emotional reaction. (I could be wrong )Give yourself some time to adjust. If there are people you need or need attention from- tell them! I'm sure they will care enough to do that. Chin up dear. Praying for you.

-Danielle

[jasleeve 440]

i feel selfish requesting time from people! :/

With women, EVERYthing seems to have an effect on estrogen levels. Age, weight gain, weight loss, the earth revolving around the sun . So, I'm guessing surgery and weight loss you've experienced before and after and the gravity of the permanent change in your body and your life.......just....might make one emotional and any changes in estrogen are going to exacerbate this emotional reaction. (I could be wrong )Give yourself some time to adjust. If there are people you need or need attention from- tell them! I'm sure they will care enough to do that. Chin up dear. Praying for you.

-Danielle

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

jasleeve

don't feel wrong/bad about asking for help from your friends acquaintances . Thats what friends are for. If one of your friends called to talk to you saying they need someone to talk to for some help, or just to talk, would you turn away, of course not.

"you might have an underlying depression going on"

my therapist once told me that 50% of people go to a therapist, the other 50% should..

Dorrie i agree with what you said "that this is a hard time around the holidays for many people" , and people might feel (incorrectly) that you are busy with other friends and family) it is a hard time for many, but.....

Jasleeve I have long arms, i wish i could give you a big hug

many good thoughts being sent to you

kathy

DOS12/15/11

[jasleeve 440]

awww kathy u r such a sweet heart! <3

i do feel guilty because they all have their own things going on & i feel uncomfortable asking them to listen to me whine.

jasleeve

don't feel wrong/bad about asking for help from your friends acquaintances . Thats what friends are for. If one of your friends called to talk to you saying they need someone to talk to for some help, or just to talk, would you turn away, of course not.

"you might have an underlying depression going on"

my therapist once told me that 50% of people go to a therapist, the other 50% should..

Dorrie i agree with what you said "that this is a hard time around the holidays for many people" , and people might feel (incorrectly) that you are busy with other friends and family) it is a hard time for many, but.....

Jasleeve I have long arms, i wish i could give you a big hug

many good thoughts being sent to you

kathy

DOS12/15/11

[caterpiller 0]

What makes you week now will make you stronger later. I can only imagine how you feel i have not been sleeve still waiting for next year. From seen your videos in You Tube I know you have a good heart and thats why you need all the afection at this moment. Go and see the videos you made this will remind you now why you had this surgery. My daughter asked me why did i choose my name caterpiller i explained that this is how i feel now with my weight. Than when i loose it i will become a beautiful butterfly. Right now you need support say how you really feel also if your friends have not gone thru this journey they do not know how it feels. I cannot wait to see your proguess!

[jasleeve 440]

aw! i have a butterfly tattooed on my lower back. it represents growth. i think the holidays have a part to do with my down mood. this christmas was the worst ever. dealing with a 9.5yr break up.. not having that "love & affection" that youre so used to & want so bad during surgery is hard. a lot of my "friends" try to give me tough love and i guess i appreciate it but right now, im so vulnerable with everything that tough love isnt what i neeed. i need a hug, i need a physical encounter. not sexual or anything but like a hug.. or to talk face to face. thats what i need right now. i miss it.

What makes you week now will make you stronger later. I can only imagine how you feel i have not been sleeve still waiting for next year. From seen your videos in You Tube I know you have a good heart and thats why you need all the afection at this moment. Go and see the videos you made this will remind you now why you had this surgery. My daughter asked me why did i choose my name caterpiller i explained that this is how i feel now with my weight. Than when i loose it i will become a beautiful butterfly. Right now you need support say how you really feel also if your friends have not gone thru this journey they do not know how it feels. I cannot wait to see your proguess!

[shellbelle 4]

I know exactly where you're coming from. My surgery is on the 4th of January (coming up fast!) and I am concerned about being depressed because I don't have any friends and my husband of 21 years left me during the holidays of 2009 so the holidays have been a pretty depressing time for me ever since then. I am wondering if I will be an emotional wreck after the surgery.

But what I DO know is that the girls (and guys) on this board care SO MUCH about everyone so at the very least you have hundreds of supporters on this board that are here for you whenever you need it - including me!

And pretty soon the fog will lift and you will be feeling great and hopeful for your new future and your new body!

At least that is what I keep telling myself.

[jasleeve 440]

21yrs.. wow! i fear for you as far as support goes. its really needed. you need someone there letting you know they have your back. well atleast, i know i do. i am very grateful for my mom but shes more reserved. im not asking to be babied. im asking for convo.. keep my mind going. im alone too much & it gives me time to think & thinking can be dangerous!!! other than that, im fine!

I know exactly where you're coming from. My surgery is on the 4th of January (coming up fast!) and I am concerned about being depressed because I don't have any friends and my husband of 21 years left me during the holidays of 2009 so the holidays have been a pretty depressing time for me ever since then. I am wondering if I will be an emotional wreck after the surgery.

But what I DO know is that the girls (and guys) on this board care SO MUCH about everyone so at the very least you have hundreds of supporters on this board that are here for you whenever you need it - including me!

And pretty soon the fog will lift and you will be feeling great and hopeful for your new future and your new body!

At least that is what I keep telling myself.

[shellbelle 4]

Well, I'll have my mom and my sister there for me, but it sucks not having a "significant other" to turn to for support and encouragement.But my marriage wasn't filled with much "love and affection" anyway so although it is something that I wish I had, I wasn't used to it or anything so I think I'll manage just fine without it. I won't even know what I was missing.

[jasleeve 440]

i feel the same exact way about my past relationship. i mean, it had love & affection when i provided it but none from him unless i forced it out. as far as having a sister & mom, thats great! i think i may be adopted because my family is not affectionate whatsoever! im the opposite. i have a sibling who lives in florida (im in ny) & he called me yesterday for a conversation that lasted 1minute (NO EXAGGERATION) & he asked how i was feeling & i said im in pain & his reaction was, "well you chose to do this so now deal with it." i stood quiet. it hurt my feelings that he had nothing comforting to say to me. when i told my mom, she laughed & said shes sure he didnt mean it. i stood quiet then too!

Well, I'll have my mom and my sister there for me, but it sucks not having a "significant other" to turn to for support and encouragement.But my marriage wasn't filled with much "love and affection" anyway so although it is something that I wish I had, I wasn't used to it or anything so I think I'll manage just fine without it. I won't even know what I was missing.

[Lissa 2,631]

Oh, (((jasleeve))), I So know how you're feeling right now. My DH and I just broke up and have ended communication; my sister is not where I can talk to her right now; my brother sucks eggs at having a sibling rleationship; and my kids are grown with their own lives. I was feeling pretty down last night myself.

This morning, however, I got up, made some Decaf coffee, took myself for a ride on the exercise bike to get my endorphins going, and spent some time both here and re-reading my blog. After a while, I did some hard-core cleaning and called a few relatives who live in other states and I felt so much better!

I have a theory about my psyche and that is this: If I let myself feel sad and lonely, I'll be sad and lonely. Therefore, I don't allow myself to feel sad and lonely. If I do end up there for some reason, I find something to do that makes me feel useful. Then I feel better.

Maybe I'm lucky that my pep talks work for me, because otherwise I'd be curled up in a ball somewhere in a rubber room! LOL

I hope your day got better and, please, don't be afraid to reach out to your friends and family. I know they don't always give us the response we need, but at least it keeps us connected.

Good luck to all of us!!!

[LGoz 4]

Jasleeve - I was sleeved on Dec 15th. I chose to not tell anyone about my surgery. My husband, mother and 1 very dear friend are the only ones that know ( I come from a very big family!!) They have been a wonderful support team for me. And or course everyone on this wonderful site that are right there with all the support in the world. Even with all of that said, I too have felt "blue" over the past week or so. I really think it is the Holiday. We lost our teenage son in 2008 and Christmas is really hard on me. I'm telling you this only because I think that maybe there might be another reason for your "down" feeling. I can feel it coming on for me.. once it starts it is hard to stop it.. But if you stay positive it will turn around and you will see the brightness in the gloom! Trust me I have been there many times..

Also on the Protein drinks.. I have been drinking Isopure 40 grams in 20 ounces bottles. they have a bunch of flavors and they are really good. I do NOT like milk so I will not drink the shakes or milky tasting ones. They even have a non-flavored power that I'm going to order to mix with ice tea etc.. I will let you know how that tastes after I get it..

Anyway Hang in there and keep looking for the Brightness and the Gloom will pass... Laura