Going On A Date..what To Eat?

[heylinda 0]

I'm going on a date but I'm worried he will think something is wrong when I order a meal and take literally two bites and be done. I've lost 88lbs but I am still over weight so I'm just afraid he's going to think something is up at dinner. Anyone have any suggestions to make this as least awkward as possible?

[happy1957 138]

I am not a sleever yet, but assume Soup can go a long way?

[Pookeyism 1,143]

Keep focusing on the really expensive items, ask for the wine and dessert list, and then when you order a chicken ceasar salad they will be so happy they won't ask any questions!

If it is going to be a talk and chat dinner, perhaps Soup would be a good option. You can take sips all through the dinner. Perhaps this would be a good time to mention the surgery?

[longer-life 139]

I would say something like "my stomach is a little unsettled, so I will have some soup" and move on with the conversation. Through the night, as he order dish after dish, reassure him (if needed) you are doing fine and enjoying yourself (if you are). Act as if it no big deal. :-)

[Lissa 2,631]

I agree with longer life and pookey!! Order Soup, but don't make a big deal of it. If he asks and you're not comfortable with mentioning your surgery yet, then just say you had a big lunch or Breakfast or that you're just not really hungry right now. Say it with a smile, not a doom and gloom attitude, and he won't think a thing of it.

We work ourselves up over how much we eat in front of guys, but most of them don't notice or care unless we really make a huge deal of it. My "wonderful" husband didn't really notice the change in my eating habits when we went to Breakfast a couple of times after surgery. I've also been out to eat with a couple of male friends (former co-workers) since surgery and neither of them said a word either...and they have definitely seen me eat at my heaviest!

If you're really worried that soup isn't enough, order a chicken salad, like Pookey suggested, eat the grilled chicken and push the lettuce part around on the plate. I've watched plenty of thinner girlfriends do that and you'd never realize they didn't eat much.

Enjoy the date! He's out to prove to you that he's worth you spending your time with him, so let him be a gentleman and audition for your time. Good luck!!

[MegInNOLA 531]

I agree that a big part of it is how you do it, not what you do. :-) Here's what I do in every restaurant setting:

1. Order water; this keeps the wait staff from continuously asking you about a drink. You don't have to drink the Water, just order it and let them bring it to you.

2. When ordering the meal, say, "It all looks wonderful. I'd like a cup of Soup (or one of the other things suggested below) for my entree, please," smile at the waiter, and hand him/her your menu.

3. After your companion(s) order, ask a question about something you're interested in--doesn't matter what--just start a conversation. Enjoy the company and just move forward from the topic of food! ("You were saying that you were having a tough time at work this week? What's up with that?")

4. When the food arrives, take your time! You can take a couple of spoons of soup and then put your spoon down and chat for a bit. This is actually a perfect time for you to do some of the talking about you, because your companion will have more food to eat and will be eating it.

Most of the time, people I'm eating with either have no idea that I'm eating a LOT less than they are, or they just don't care because it seems like it's normal for me (which at this point, it is!).

Other options besides soup: A small salad; chicken salad sandwich on toast (open it and eat the "guts" of the sandwich--you can easily say you're low-carbing and everyone understands that); shrimp cocktail appetizer for your entree--I do this all the time, too.

The biggest part is that I just act like it's not a big deal. Honestly, nobody really cares how much you eat, as long as they are enjoying themselves and you are enjoying yourself. Hope you have a great time on your date!!

[Simply_KiZmet 9]

I usually do Soup or an appetizer with Water. I focus on the conversation more than eating. Like the above posts, guys rarely notice how much we eat... If he does make a comment then you can either explain that you had surgery or say you're stuffed from earlier.

[gettingtohappy 23]

Congrats on the date. Sounds like fun! I'm married but I know one thing...I wouldn't tell him about my surgery...none of his biz until you have formed a solid bond (engaged to be married or solid relationship)! But that's just my opinion....I had a similar situation...office Christmas luncheon! We all had to pre-order our dish.

I'm only 3 weeks post op so I ordered the fresh mushrooms and Pasta. I was thinking something soft. I gave most of my mushrooms to an admiring co-worker and took a few bites of pasta...then I started cutting it all up into little bits on my plate...wow...that looked like I'd put a dent in the dish! I think read somewhere that's how anorexic sufferers used to fake eating. So I tried it and it looked pretty good.

One thing I do know is that I'm not going to continue to eat and damage myself so that people won't question me. I'm not saying this is your thought process...it was just what was going through my mind at the luncheon.

I think you have the best idea though...just let him know you are not that hungry...and that's the truth!

[Indymom 132]

When I go out for business lunches and don't want to have to discuss my surgery, I do a soup/salad or a grilled chicken entree salad. It's easy to eat mostly the chicken and push the rest around.

[heylinda 0]

Thank you everyone! Soup and conversation..got it!

[FishingNurse 1,210]

This is so funny because I just ha my 3rd date with my dream man-- he knows I has surgery even. When I'm nervous my sleeve doesnt hold much- I could only eat 3 bites of my burger Friday. And I felt embarrassed and said something like I wish I could eat more it's so good! But he just said who cares! We have a fourth date next Friday! This sleeve has given me so much confidence dating. It will be fine!

[Less of Leslie 90]

ALWAYS ask that you be served 1/2 and box the other 1/2. That way, it looks like less on your plate, and just let him know that you know that you won't be able to finish.

[MoonSiren 48]

A very skinny co-worker cuts up half of whatever she is served and then sets it aside, then eats the other half. She eats veeery slow. When everyone is done eating, she gets it boxed up and takes it home to her husband so he can eat it. I wonder if she has weight loss surgery or just practices healthy eating habits.

[sychadelic 10]

Hope you have a great time!

[longer-life 139]

This is so funny because I just ha my 3rd date with my dream man--

How awesome!!!!!!!