Up And Down

[Paola 62]

I am overweight, and as long as I remember I have always been overweight. I remember that during all my summer vacations my dad would put me on a new diet, but they wouldn't work, I would sabotage myself. Last Christmas I went to my native country, Dominican Republic, to spend the holidays with my family there. When my dad saw me at the airport the first words out of his mouth were "nothing but surgery is going to help you lose weight", and he spent all the time I was there trying to convince me to have WLS, he said he would pay for it. I refused his offer, I was convinced I could lose all the weight on my own. On June I finally decided to get on with the diet I was supposed to start after Christmas, it was very upsetting to see that my scale would not weigh me. After a few weeks of dieting I finally realized that I needed help and that having WLS was not giving up, I realized that it was only my stubbornness and pride that was holding me back. That same day I called my dad, he said he still wanted to help me. On July 27 I got on a plane heading for Dominican Republic.

Fast forward 4 months and I have lost 50 pounds, 20 more than what my doctor required for surgery; my dad has the money for the surgery, and the only thing holding back my surgery was my insurance card. I have been waiting for 2 months for this card, we've had so many problems with this insurance process. Today I finally got my card, and I was so happy. However, my happiness turned into frustrations an hour ago when my dad told me I could not have my blood work done tomorrow, that I had to wait until the end of the week. I know the end of the week is only a few days away but it just seems that every time I think this blood work is finally going to get done it is postponed. The longer I wait for this surgery the more anxious and frustrated I get, like my aunt would say, "my nerves are nervous!"

I think that what really is bothering me is that my mom and sisters are not here with me, they are in Miami. We are very close, and I miss them. I know I should feel happy because it shouldn't be much longer, but I don't feel happy right now. I want this surgery to be over with so I can return home.

[twoboysandagirl 109]

Hang in there! I know it is hard to wait. You can do this, just try to concentrate on all the things ahead of you. Make yourself journal about things you want to do and try. Can't wait to hear that you are all done with the pre-op and heading into surgery. Praying for your journey:)

[Paola 62]

twoboysandagirl- thank you, your prayers are welcome