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wow, i feel the same way, and i don't even have a date yet! i've been trying really hard not to buy clothes, while fighting the urge to pack up everything in my closet and take it to the goodwill! i feel so uncomfortable in my clothes, when i'm sure i wasn't as aware of that feeling a couple of months ago...part of me wants to go on a diet, just to show the doctors that i can be disciplined; another part of me feels like what is the point, i might as well eat everything in sight since i'm planning on having the surgery(i guess that's the "food funeral" thing :embaressed_smile: )...nope, you are definitely not alone.

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What you are all feeling is normal! :) I think we go through stages just before surgery that are very similar to the stages of grief. First we are excited to finally be doing something about our weight, then we are in a hurry to get surgery over with, then we start thinking about what we "can't have" after surgery (food funerals), and then we have the stage where we second guess our decision and worry about "what if". And, the stages don't happen in any particular order, plus we can revisit any stage at any moment.

I think it's all normal and is part of our mental adjustment to our new life. Sometimes the stages continue even after surgery because we're so restricted food-wise in the beginning.

I'm nearly 3 months out and I am just now starting to feel "normal" again, mentally. I am back on solid foods. I've changed my eating habits because I'm lactose intolerant, plus sweets gag me right now. My "new normal" is to eat Protein and drink Water first, then worry about everything else. It's pretty well ingrained and that's a good thing. But, the first few weeks were a bit of a struggle while my mind caught up with what my body needs.

I think going through the mental process is just as important as the physical process of surgery and recovery. The lap banders have a saying about "banding the head". I think our mental process is "sleeving the head". If we don't go through the mental stages, it causes other problems...like not eating properly. And, we didn't spend this much money, or jump through the insurance hoops, to fail! :)

Good luck to each of you as you go through surgery! I can't wait to see you all on the loser's bench!! :)

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Oh God, I feel this post so hard! I have NOT been myself since I decided to go ahead with surgery. I haven't been this big since high school (as I am usually able to yo-yo diet most of my weight off), but since I have vowed never to diet again, I am just out of control with eating, none of my clothes fit, and I am just kind of being a recluse until this is all over. I don't want to get my hair done, get a pedicure (my feet look like the Blair Witch LOL), and I don't really even want to put on makeup. I feel as though I am just gaining and waiting for my life to start over.

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food funerals is the best way to express myself, as said by Lissa above. since i knew i would not be able to eat my favorite foods in larger quantities, and all the wrong stuff like sweets so, I've been stuffing my face :cryin: My dr. did not require me to lose weight pre-surgery. I wish he had. The bottom line is I gained 20 lbs. Yes you read that right. I must be the only one in sleeve history to have gained weight before surgery.

Today is Tuesday 11/22/11. I started today my own liquid shake diet. thanksgiving we will be out of town. :No one knows about my WLS, and I'm going to keep it that way.. So 11/22,11/23 on liquids- thanksgiving will eat soooo carefully, and 11/26 I will be back on the liquids. That gives me 12 days liquid to lose maybe 5 lbs. DOS is 12/6 - can't wait!!! Pretty bummed about what I did to myself, nothing will change it, no going back, so i know i got to get over myself, and look to the future, like all of us do.

thanx for listening :bounce: Kathy

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I finally just finished jumping through all the hoops required by my insurance and have my appointment to discuss surgery on 12/1. It feels like this process has been an eternity! I am exacly at the 40 BMI and have not been able to lose any weight through this process like they want you too because then I wouldn't qualify. I just want that surgeon appointment to weigh in and then I can start exercising, etc. I am hoping to have surgery in January and it feels like it is months away.... I am so embarrassed at my size. I don't want to see anyone or go anywhere. Nothing fits and I just feel gross! I am so ready for this new journey in life!

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It's so good to know I'm not alone! I'm here to chat if you ever need to!!

Thanks!! that goes the same for you! :)

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I finally just finished jumping through all the hoops required by my insurance and have my appointment to discuss surgery on 12/1. It feels like this process has been an eternity! I am exacly at the 40 BMI and have not been able to lose any weight through this process like they want you too because then I wouldn't qualify. I just want that surgeon appointment to weigh in and then I can start exercising, etc. I am hoping to have surgery in January and it feels like it is months away.... I am so embarrassed at my size. I don't want to see anyone or go anywhere. Nothing fits and I just feel gross! I am so ready for this new journey in life!

Emily,

what insurance do you have?? When i started this process 3 months ago, my BMI was right at 40 and my PCP said that i needed to "show" some weight loss but so far i've only lost like 6 lbs. My last appt is on the 9th and i'm afraid i haven't dropped any weight and that makes me afraid the insurance is going to give me trouble. :(

Has anyone had any trouble because they HAVEN'T lost weight??

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As far as pre-op "blues" I figured i didn't have a corner on this. I was so blue, i unfortunately did the worst thing in the world. I figured I would eat some food i should not have, since i know i couldn't later. I.E. Cookies, and other stuff like that :nonod: Over the past 6 weeks i actually have gained 20 lbs :confused5: Boy is it easy to gain weight. I'm so upset this happened. There's nothing i can do of course now.

My dr. didn't require a 5% weight loss, so i over ate!! After Thanksgiving I'm gonna put myself on a strict liquid diet, maybe to lose 5-10 lbs. So i just wanted to unload. Thanx WLS 12/6/11 kathy :nonod:

I dont think there's anyone who doesnt feel horrible about themselves right now, or else we wouldnt be getting this surgery. I hate going out, looking in the mirror, hate getting dressed daily, dread going to work, dread seeing anyone i know when i do go out, and all out miserable. I've had several last meals, and gained 7 lbs in a month, so im even more miserable. It got to the point my boyfriend couldnt even stand to be around me anymore, so we're on a "break" right now, which depresses me even more. I'm trying to make the best of this knowing soon i'm going to start a new life (wls date 12/9). Until then, all we can do is take it one day at a time, and when we look in the mirror know that we only have to not like what we see for a little bit longer!

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