Not sure that this was the right thing to do?

[Mera 1]

I have Psoriatic Arthritis and I take an infusion every 6 weeks that runs about $12,000. Was just starting to take Diabetic meds and I had high Cholesteral. My insurance company, Aetna, via my personal nurse who calls monthly to check on me, suggested that I think about having Bariatric Surgery. I have to admit that Aetna and my employer have taken great care of me the last few years through my company benefits. I've had some serious health issues and I have received excellent care no matter what service I've needed.

When I started my Bariatric journey I was 5'4" and weighed 260 lbs. The day of surgery, Sept. 7th 2011, I was down to 233. The next day after surgery, I weighed 223, so, the part of the stomach they removed was 10 lbs. I don't hop on and off the scale much but the last time I weighed, about a week ago, I was down to 200 lbs. It's kind of surreal, no one warned me it would be so fast. I am 60 lbs lighter in the space of two months! That's the bonus. I had the surgery hoping to improve my health not to lose weight. I didn't mind being a fat girl that much! ;o)

Now, I'm not takiing Diabetes meds, don't know about my Cholesteral yet, my Psorisis & Psoriatic Arthritis have not flared and my joints have been great considering I was off my arthritis meds for so long before & after surgery. I've had an infusion since my surgery and I had lost enough to need one less vial of Remicade, costing me, my employer, & Aetna less money than the previous infusion. That's huge! I know it is...

Whenever I mention to a doctor that I think I'm just in starvation mode... well... they don't want to hear that!! I believe that. The truth is that I don't put a cup of food a day into my body. I work off more calories than I take in, easily... every day. I can't eat. I can't stand the whey Protein products and I am NOT a milk girl. I smell the stuff & my gag reflex goes into high gear (only since the surgery it's done this). I'm getting plenty of liquids but not nearly enough protein or anything for that matter. That worries me. I only eat a few bites and the burping and belching starts. Gosh! I hope this gets better because right now, I'm not feeling really good about my decision in spite of the positive changes it's brought. I'm hoping this place will help me figure out how to work through various things that I am learning in this new life of mine.

Don't Wanna Be Disappointed in Dallas,

Mera

[meljef1 1]

Wow after reading your message the only thing I can't get past is hearing you say you didn't mind

"being a fat girl" I'm just wondering if that mindset is making you feel you made a mistake. i would think along with health reasons a part of you would want to feel better about your self.

[thinoneday 445]

Wow, I sure minded being the fat girl! Especially when it came to seats in the planes or not being able to ride horses. . . yup i sure did mind. . . have you thought about speaking to a councelor about your self esteem issues? I'm glad to see your health issues are clearing up. . . i'm 2 years out and can only eat 1/2 potatoe, and 1 ounce piece of brisket at dinner. . i never go to eat at buffets anymore because that is a waste of money for me since i eat much more normal now. i still go out to eat at restaurants, but always take back home. Those meals will usually last me 2 days or so. . . i still eat junk food, only in smaller amounts. . .i still drink alcohol only 1 glass verus 3-4 . Our grocery bill is basically non existent and that is good for me!!! it does get better, only now i eat like a lady and not like something else . . good luck

[KellyL 173]

I'm lost?? What part of your journey are you hating? The burping/belching? Sometimes burping is our sleeves new way of telling us it's had enough food and we should stop for now. Sometimes it's due to acid, are you on a PPI/acid reducer? And as far as hating the smell of whey Protein or milk, then just don't worry about it and try to get your protein in from regular foods. Some people are lactose intolerant in the beginning. It may take a while to start getting in the minimum amt of protein, but some is much better than way too little. Maybe you're having the "buyers remorse" that some people talk about having in the first month or two? It's hard for me to grasp this, as I didn't have it at all, not one second of regret or remorse. But I know we're all different. It definitely takes a while to get adjusted to eating protein regularly and all, so I understand, and you are still fairly early out. It does indeed get easier, the further out you get. You kinda find things you can easily tolerate to eat, and you get in the routine of eating small amts of protein all thru the day.

Your health problems sound like they have greatly improved, you're doing great on the weight loss, even though you view it just as a bonus. I can relate, as I has surgery to improve my health and mobility first, then looks/weight second. But I will not deny that looking better feels great and has improved my self esteem and confidence. I wasn't extremely unhappy with my weight either and had come to accept it til I felt I was becoming housebound and unable to do the simplest things without pain, such as shower, grocery shop, walk up my stairs in my home. I am an extremely slow loser (not any fault of my sleeve, i knew this going in) but the difference the Sleeve and the weight loss have made in my life is extremely positive. I am very happy with my new sleeve. I hope you can reach that point in your journey soon and start enjoying your life. You came to the right place to get a lot of advise, ideas, and support.

[meljef1 1]

Wow, I sure minded being the fat girl! Especially when it came to seats in the planes or not being able to ride horses. . . yup i sure did mind. . . have you thought about speaking to a councelor about your self esteem issues? I'm glad to see your health issues are clearing up. . . i'm 2 years out and can only eat 1/2 potatoe, and 1 ounce piece of brisket at dinner. . i never go to eat at buffets anymore because that is a waste of money for me since i eat much more normal now. i still go out to eat at restaurants, but always take back home. Those meals will usually last me 2 days or so. . . i still eat junk food, only in smaller amounts. . .i still drink alcohol only 1 glass verus 3-4 . Our grocery bill is basically non existent and that is good for me!!! it does get better, only now i eat like a lady and not like something else . . good luck

[meljef1 1]

I hope you will see positive changes as time goes on.

[Mera 1]

Wow after reading your message the only thing I can't get past is hearing you say you didn't mind

"being a fat girl" I'm just wondering if that mindset is making you feel you made a mistake. i would think along with health reasons a part of you would want to feel better about your self.

Just because I was overweight doesn't mean I had low self esteem or emotional problems. Yes I was overweight. Technically I still am... I'd like to get to 165-175 but my doctor tells me I'd still be overweight bordering obesity unless I lose down to 145-150.

I have absolutely no desire to be that small. I like my curves and I feel just find about myself both now, and before I had surgery. I didn't do this to lose weight. I did it to get my arthritis into remission. I have no self esteem issues at all.

My point was that if it doesn't get better on a daily basis, I'm not sure it was worth the change in my quality of living. We spend a lot of time socially at the table. After the sleeve there isn't alot of table sitting being done. I have to find better ways of communing socially is all. Besides, I am convinced that it has to get better and that I'll learn ways to make it so.

[Mera 1]

Wow, I sure minded being the fat girl! Especially when it came to seats in the planes or not being able to ride horses. . . yup i sure did mind. . . have you thought about speaking to a councelor about your self esteem issues? I'm glad to see your health issues are clearing up. . . i'm 2 years out and can only eat 1/2 potatoe, and 1 ounce piece of brisket at dinner. . i never go to eat at buffets anymore because that is a waste of money for me since i eat much more normal now. i still go out to eat at restaurants, but always take back home. Those meals will usually last me 2 days or so. . . i still eat junk food, only in smaller amounts. . .i still drink alcohol only 1 glass verus 3-4 . Our grocery bill is basically non existent and that is good for me!!! it does get better, only now i eat like a lady and not like something else . . good luck

LOL... Yanno, what slays me is that when I said I didn't mind being a fat girl, people jump to the conclusion that I have self esteem issues. Just the opposite actually. I have great self esteem and being overweight didn't make me less than.

However, you did give me info that actually is helpful so thanks for that. It's reassuring to know that even after 2 years eating such a small amount is normal and okay. I was worried that I am not getting enough food, nutrients, ect. Since I'm never hungry I can't really gauge yet what is normal and what isn't or what I need in my body to live and what isn't necessary. I don't know those kinds of things yet... since I didn't really get alot of helpful info from my doctor or the dietician, I knew I needed input from others who have probably felt just like I do. It is why I came to this forum. To learn... ;o)

[longer-life 139]

I am pre-op, so I will be brief. Seems you are worried about your health despite the improvements in your pre-existing conditions. Have you had blood work? That might put you at ease.

Also, Isopure sells premixed drinks that taste and look like juice, rather than milk. They are sold at GNC and I am sure elsewhere. Other brands probably have it too.

Best wishes!

[Mera 1]

I'm lost?? What part of your journey are you hating? The burping/belching? Sometimes burping is our sleeves new way of telling us it's had enough food and we should stop for now. Sometimes it's due to acid, are you on a PPI/acid reducer? And as far as hating the smell of whey Protein or milk, then just don't worry about it and try to get your Protein in from regular foods. Some people are lactose intolerant in the beginning. It may take a while to start getting in the minimum amt of protein, but some is much better than way too little. Maybe you're having the "buyers remorse" that some people talk about having in the first month or two? It's hard for me to grasp this, as I didn't have it at all, not one second of regret or remorse. But I know we're all different. It definitely takes a while to get adjusted to eating protein regularly and all, so I understand, and you are still fairly early out. It does indeed get easier, the further out you get. You kinda find things you can easily tolerate to eat, and you get in the routine of eating small amts of protein all thru the day.

Your health problems sound like they have greatly improved, you're doing great on the weight loss, even though you view it just as a bonus. I can relate, as I has surgery to improve my health and mobility first, then looks/weight second. But I will not deny that looking better feels great and has improved my self esteem and confidence. I wasn't extremely unhappy with my weight either and had come to accept it til I felt I was becoming housebound and unable to do the simplest things without pain, such as shower, grocery shop, walk up my stairs in my home. I am an extremely slow loser (not any fault of my sleeve, i knew this going in) but the difference the Sleeve and the weight loss have made in my life is extremely positive. I am very happy with my new sleeve. I hope you can reach that point in your journey soon and start enjoying your life. You came to the right place to get a lot of advise, ideas, and support.

Thank you Kelly!! What a nice post. I am still early out and I know nothing so, it is great to know that it does get better. Yes, I hate the burping and belching, I do hope that stops sometime soon. I think what I was the most unsure of is if I am getting enough food to live on since I am not using the whey Proteins. I am trying to take in small meals several times a day that all include protein but when it gets down to it, I only have 2 or 3 very small bites, tops. I just wasn't sure that that would be enough. I know it isn't ideal but I just can't get the artificial protein down. I don't hate the weight loss. LOL It's fabulous & I look great. I just don't always feel great and I have questions. This is all so new to me and so totally foreign. I am tickled that I have a place to ask my questions! I have a thing about knowledge... here, I can learn the things I need to know!! Yay! I'm very happy about finding this place! ;o) Thank you EVERYONE!!!

[Mera 1]

I hope you will see positive changes as time goes on.

Thank you. I have seen lots of positive changes already and I am extremely grateful for them.

I just am unsure about some things so I came here to find some answers so that life can be better.

And, in one short afternoon. I've gotten lots of great advise and information I didn't have this morning.

So, it's all good!

[coops 1,790]

Mera,

I am now 15mths out and it is very different to the early stages... I understand completely when you talk about social eating and eating enough to be healthy.

From about 6mths onwards, most, myself included, are able to eat much more... and therefore there is 'space' for veggies and fruits that you might not be able to get in now. This, I am sure will help with your worries. The body is a very resiliant machine and can cope with a lot of things. Honestly, I am sure you are doing fine... and it sounds like you are really upbeat and positive person. I wish I had a little of your self esteem if I am honest. This is an area that I struggle with more than getting my Protein in....lol... but I working on it, slowly.

Stick with it and do what you have to do... you've made a great start! =]

[lisajxoxo 11]

Hi Mera, welcome to VST! I don't really have any advice to give you because I'm just newly sleeved. I will tell you though that I was (quite possibly) addicted to this site when I first found it. There is a wealth of information here. I used the search button up top and found answers to so many of my questions.

Good Luck and welcome!

[AllForMy4 58]

Welcome Mera! I am new here myself and I am pre-op so I can't give you much advice but I can say congrats on following through with something that will and seems like it already has made you healthier!

[LindaS 316]

I have a family that socializes around food a lot. I found that if I bring my own meals, I could sit down with them and enjoy the socialization while eating what I needed to eat. When I was in the early stages, this meant I had cottage cheese or a yogurt/pudding with Protein powder mixed in to it.

This would take me a while to eat, but it gave me something to eat when everyone else was eating. We all tended to finish about the same time. I still carry some of my own meals because there are things I don't eat like pizza. It made it easier because I didn't miss out on the socializing.

BariWise makes fruit-flavored Protein drinks. This lets you get 15 grams of Protein in on one serving. They taste pretty good. Even my family liked them (although the smell isn't that great). To help avoid the smell, try one of those blender cups (it is a cup with a lid and a metal shaker inside that helps mix everything up). I found one for $3.00 at BariatricChoice.com.

Good luck!