Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

people comments on my weight



Recommended Posts

Since this weight loss journey, I've had to deal with a lot of comments, mostly good. I am a pear shape and tend to lose weight first on top so I prepared myself to hear some negative comments (i heard those when i had lost weight before). I'm hearing things like: I need to eat something before i blow away, I don't need to lose anymore weight, i'm getting too skinny, I'm going to look like a bubblehead if i lose any more, etc. now mind you these are not from people that are significant to me. I'm 5'6 and started out at almost 250 and wear a size 20.. now I'm 182 and wear a size 14 on my bottom and 12 on top.. i'm trying to drop down to a size 10 bottom but would evaluate myself once i'm a size 12 on bottom.. so in what world is that too skinny or that i can't afford to lose more weight. I find myself getting defensive and that frustrate me. People are making it seem I'm being ridiculous and unreasonable. I guess i'm tired of hearing it because i'm going home to see my family on thanksgiving (they don't know about my surgery just that i've been losing weight) and I expect more comments along the same line.

I just wanted to vent a little

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know it sounds crazy, but some people actually think they are complimenting us by telling us we need to stop losing weight or we're gonna blow away and such. Try not to let it affect you because you know what's best for you and what a healthy weight is. Sometimes if it's people who have only seen us bigger, it takes a while for them to adjust to the changes in us, and we might not look like ourselves to them. But what's important is that we're becoming healthier, and no one gets to decide how much we weigh, but us. Congrats on your success, you're doing fabulous!

:)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

When they say stuff like that just smile and say "Thank you for noticing!!" That will shut them up. I agree with Kelly too that that's how some people compliment, but I also think some of them are jealous. Keep up the GREAT work! You will be where YOU want to be before you know it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Take the compliments with pride, people get jealous and see how you are changing and know they want to also. My wife didn't like my weight loss and has made those type of comments, she is now trying to lose since other people comment on my loss and show interest in how I did it. I find the waitresses and third party people that know me give honest opinions and for some they see me as getting to thin for my body. My doctor tends to agree so we changed goal from 150 to 180 as I am at 195 now. Being a guy it is nice to hear from the ladies and some think I look fine now, why mess with success?

As for how much to lose, you have to live with yourself and if you lose weight in the undesired places then get a trainer to help mold body sections. My trainer helps to mold legs and arms so as to not get flabby skin and help shape the tummy and sides.

Sometimes it is now weight loss we need it is body molding as we can't control from what part of the body we lose weight from.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't think people realize they are offending you, or if they do they are jealous and being nasty. Either way who cares right? Your happy and only you will know when you have finished losing weight, not them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Congrats on the progress. I too have had more than my share of comments from negative to positive. People can come up with the most insensitive stuff at times. Many things can be attributed to this behavior, as already pointed out jealousy can be a big factor, ignorance and plain rudeness for others. I just let it roll and live my life the way I want to now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You've had some great success so far! Just keep doing what you're doing. When people make insensitive comments, something like, "Thanks-- my doctor and I had a conversation about this just last week, and he/she said I'm right on track!" will usually shut them up.

I've actually experienced the opposite--I have a very visible, people-intensive job as a musician/teacher, so I have a LOT of people who are seeing me for the first time since surgery and 90+ pounds ago. Their reactions are overwhelmingly positive, but sometimes I feel really awkward being the center of attention, even about this fairly positive thing. I'm not used to being quite as "noticed," if you get my drift, and even when it's nice people saying nice (not inappropriate) things, it's really challenging for me to simply smile and say, "Thank you. I feel great!" or something. I have a professional conference coming up in a couple of weeks, and it's going to be another round of "oh my goodness" and "wow, you look great," and don't get me wrong, I feel that I DO look so much better, but it still takes some getting used to.

You might practice comebacks, both to positive and less positive comments, until they feel natural. I always try to take the high road and not answer as if someone is being deliberately snarky (even if I think they are), but that's the southern girl in me, I guess. Plus, now I feel great, so I'm just not inclined to be as snippy. :rolleyes:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

These are all such great responses! I don't really have anything to add but wanted to share that I have already gotten a couple of those "you are so 'skinny'" and "how much more weight are you going to lose?" which is really strange because I haven't even broken the 190's yet and I am NOT even half way to goal!!!! So geez!!! Like Kelly said above, I think some of these folks have only seen us bigger so cannot imagine us anyother way. But it is difficult, as Meg mentioned, to be the center of all that attention! I found that I tend to brace my self everytime I will be attending a particular event / meeting where folks haven't seen me in a while. I truly don't want to talk about me and my weight and my food and, and what I'm doing, and me, me, me.... you know? I guess I'm just venting too! LOL Glad to hear the experiences of others here though! Why I appreciate this board!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Since this weight loss journey, I've had to deal with a lot of comments, mostly good. I am a pear shape and tend to lose weight first on top so I prepared myself to hear some negative comments (i heard those when i had lost weight before). I'm hearing things like: I need to eat something before i blow away, I don't need to lose anymore weight, i'm getting too skinny, I'm going to look like a bubblehead if i lose any more, etc. now mind you these are not from people that are significant to me. I'm 5'6 and started out at almost 250 and wear a size 20.. now I'm 182 and wear a size 14 on my bottom and 12 on top.. i'm trying to drop down to a size 10 bottom but would evaluate myself once i'm a size 12 on bottom.. so in what world is that too skinny or that i can't afford to lose more weight. I find myself getting defensive and that frustrate me. People are making it seem I'm being ridiculous and unreasonable. I guess i'm tired of hearing it because i'm going home to see my family on thanksgiving (they don't know about my surgery just that i've been losing weight) and I expect more comments along the same line.

I just wanted to vent a little

Mina,

I can relate directly yo this... a lady that I work with has said to me more than once... 'Oh Coops, if you lose anymore weight you will look like a bobble head!' Now, this is from a woman who is TINY!! She wears a size UK8... anyway, the last time she said it to me I replied. 'Oh now don't say that 'cos you are my role model!' Follwed by a little chuckle. Needless to say, she hasn't comment on my size since and I HAVE lost more weight! I refuse to let others negative comments affect me and my sense of self. I know what is right for me... and I feel that you do too.

You just keep going as you are... you've done such a great job and I know you are looking great!

Oh, on a foot note... I would give anything to have my pearshape back...lol... my weight is now in the middle and I am defo an apple!!

Keep up the good work Mina! =]

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×