Efamcan 3 Posted October 13, 2011 Hello, My husband and I are considering the sleeve on the same day. We will have different surgeons because I don't have time to meet with the more experienced one. My Doctor, Dr. G. is supposed to be very good as well. Have any couples done this surgery together in the same week and month? My friends are concerned that I will wind up taking care of my husband instead of myself. I am hoping it will give us the willpower to eat the right foods at the right times. (It helps if you know someone else is stuck on popsicles and pudding pops too!) If you have, please post your experience. If not, do you think this is a good idea? Also, I'm getting a little nervous I just want everything to be okay! Thanks for posting! Efamcan! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RickM 1,750 Posted October 13, 2011 It's great that you are going on this journey together, considering the difficulty some couples can have when only one is going through it (whether the other spouse needs it or not!) My wife and I started on it together as well, though our paths diverged along the way to our destination (we wound up being six years apart, but that's another story.) My general philosophy on this, and one we discussed when starting out, is to plan for the best, but be prepared for the worst - what happens if one has a particularly difficult time, either with the surgery and possible complications, the immediate recovery in the hospital or shorter term post op issues at home (first couple of weeks or so.) Our thoughts when contemplating this issue was to schedule things maybe a month apart. That way the later spouse can help the first one out of bed, our of chairs, toileting, etc. as may be needed (usually shouldn't be a big deal, but people differ in how they respond to the surgery and how quickly they bounce back.) The recovering spouse may not be too eager to be cooking (such as it is, post-op) or preparing meals, going to the store, driving to the doctor if needed (or the ER - hopefully not.) etc. After a month's time, the first spouse should be recovered enough to take over those chores, and if not, the second spouse's surgery can delayed if needed. Good luck on your collective journeys - it's a great thing for a couple to do (even if not at the same time!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Finallyfit 0 Posted October 13, 2011 Hello, My husband and I are considering the sleeve on the same day. We will have different surgeons because I don't have time to meet with the more experienced one. My Doctor, Dr. G. is supposed to be very good as well. Have any couples done this surgery together in the same week and month? My friends are concerned that I will wind up taking care of my husband instead of myself. I am hoping it will give us the willpower to eat the right foods at the right times. (It helps if you know someone else is stuck on popsicles and pudding pops too!) If you have, please post your experience. If not, do you think this is a good idea? Also, I'm getting a little nervous I just want everything to be okay! Thanks for posting! Efamcan! Hey There! My husband and I are both getting sleeved this year. I'm scheduled Nov.1 and his is Dec. 20. We were hoping to be three weeks apart, but this is what worked out for us. This way, he can take care of me and I will be well enough to be there for him when he needs me. I wish you the best! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Efamcan 3 Posted October 13, 2011 Hey There! My husband and I are both getting sleeved this year. I'm scheduled Nov.1 and his is Dec. 20. We were hoping to be three weeks apart, but this is what worked out for us. This way, he can take care of me and I will be well enough to be there for him when he needs me. I wish you the best! Thanks for replying Finally Fit and RickM. Rick - Did you, your wife or anyone you know have complications? How sick are you afterwards? It is difficult to self-care? We have a friend who is willing to stay with us and take care of us for about 5 days after the surgery. Is that enough time to kept past the difficulties? Do you regress after they remove the drain. (Still not sure what that is - just learned about it.) Thanks for your feedback. Our friend recommended spacing it out too. FinallyFit - Please keep in touch and let me know how your surgery goes - I will be praying that all goes well for you and yours. How do you feel about being on different food stages? I guess you'll know when you get there. We are worried about being tempted if one person is on a different food phase than the other. Thanks. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RickM 1,750 Posted October 14, 2011 Thanks for replying Finally Fit and RickM. Rick - Did you, your wife or anyone you know have complications? How sick are you afterwards? It is difficult to self-care? We have a friend who is willing to stay with us and take care of us for about 5 days after the surgery. Is that enough time to kept past the difficulties? Do you regress after they remove the drain. (Still not sure what that is - just learned about it.) Neither my wife nor I had any major problems and recovered normally. I was outpacing her on the walks within the first week, though I was relatively fit and healthy pre-op. The second week had me down some with lower GI problems (body couldn't make up its mind whether it wanted to have diarrhea or be constipated.) I never had any particular issues with self care, though my wife had a harder time since she wasn't in as good a shape pre-op (she was a BMI 60-65 range, I was about a 42 and a semi-gymrat). She found a battery powered portable bidet unit that helped her quite a bit with toileting, given her size and post-op stiffness, I would expect that five days would normally be enough outside help, but that's another of those variables where some people may drag on longer. We do know people who have had some complications (going to the support group meetings for eight years, you do pick up on the occasional problems some people have,) and perusing these various forums you hear of the occasional person who was in the hospital 5-6 days or more with a leak or obstruction. Relatively rare events, but something to be prepared for in the unlikely event something like that does happen. We have no experience with drains after WLS as our docs normally didn't use them for their WLS procedures (I'm not sure what the differences between surgeons and techniques are where some use them while others don't,) though my wife did have several after her reconstruction surgeries where they are commonly used due to the large volume of incisions involved. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Finallyfit 0 Posted October 14, 2011 Thanks for replying Finally Fit and RickM. FinallyFit - Please keep in touch and let me know how your surgery goes - I will be praying that all goes well for you and yours. How do you feel about being on different food stages? I guess you'll know when you get there. We are worried about being tempted if one person is on a different food phase than the other. Thanks. Hey Efamcan, Thank you so much for the prayers! I will be praying you and yours as well. I will pray you have wisdom to know the best timing for you both. By the way, there is a couple on youtube that the husband did a Vlog of his VSG experience. I believe his name on youtube is thinjourney. You might take a look and see what you think. I don't think they regretted doing it together. I believe they went to Mexico. As far as being tempted during different food stages, I'm not too concerned about that. From what I have read, heard and know, most people aren't hungry after surgery and if you have cravings, they aren't what they used to be. That coupled with a liquid diet post-op for me for 3 weeks...food isn't an option even if I want to eat. My husband, on the other hand, will wait about 8 weeks for his surgery and doesn't quite like that gap for his sake. I'm excited that by the time he goes through his, I will know how to support him better. I hope you have a great day!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Believinginlisa 10 Posted January 23, 2012 We are both having surgery on Feb. 1. Taking care of ourselves, but can call friends if needed. How did you two do? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites