Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

What will I do now with my anger, sadness, anxiety and fear once the food is gone?



Recommended Posts

Hi All,

So I am writing this as I am eating cookie dough and 3 weeks until my surgery. So my therapist is concerned about my self-destructiveness- how will manage after the surgery? how will handle my addictive behaviors? how will my feelings that I stuff down with food emerge and what will that look like? I am scared to death...Is their any post-op's that can shed light here?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow - this is a loaded question. Suggest to get more responses you post in maybe another forum since usually pre-ops read this thread.

Your demons will not be diminished with surgery. You can sabatoge your sleeve. Are you sure now is the time for you; because a hard look needs to be taken at your question.

So maybe a soltution as to what to lies in asking yourself what do you do that brings a smile to your face besides food? Don't think about it - what was the first thing that was reasonable? Can you repeat this pattern rather than food?

We all battle ourselves - you can win this if you have enough desire to do so. Your success is in your hands alone. If you are confident in yourself - go for the sleeve.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have the same concern and get the same answer: maybe this isn't the ight time for u or you need therapy. To which I respond *&^%-t! I've been in therapy since I'm a teenager. There are some people who say they were full time into all these emotions prior to surgery but took off and never looked back after.

I'm 66 now. If I don't try this, I may never know if I'm able to have a real life. I'm gonna try. Not trying means giving up now. I want to at least have a peek at a different life. You???

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am going to be sleeved in 1 month. But when I had my lap band I had the same concerns- All I can say is that my "energy"/obsession was guided into another one.. and that was exercise- I became obsessed with it- until I hurt my back and couldnt go at it like before. It wasnt until I hurt my back and couldnt exercise that I realized I needed to internally deal with things and I started to really look inward into what made me do what I had done to myself?? Once I realized I couldnt blame anyone anymore and spoke to many people from my past that had either caused me pain or hurt both mental and emotional- I felt like a huge weight was lifted. I started to realize and actually soak in healthy eating and eating for 1 and usint my band a as a tool etc... I discovered a whole new world of foods, exercise I could do with a bad back etc.. IN the process I developed new relatiohships and have made friends for life with the new me if that makes sense- I am at a much better place personally and know that moving forward things can only get better but the fear of going back still looms... I think we just all need to figure out the trigger and try to deal with it...good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not blaming anyone else for my weight or my self sabotage. What you are saying is you got this therapy and it enabled you to become healthy. So why are you getting a sleeve? If you "got it" and know how to control yourself, what's the sleeve for? Why can't you just use this knowledge to further your own healthy living abilities?

Many people who 'struggle' with our emotions also "get it". But we still are struggling, we realize our weaknesses and it is frightening. I keep thinking "who's going to plant the tree I will hide under when I find that even with the sleeve and wt loss I still can't live a full life with people." I don't want to have the surgery and then find myself telling my shrink "I told ya so! I can't handle it."

So I congratulate you on your newfound ability to recognize and pursue a healthful life style.

Just because I'm scared out of my mind and worried @ how I will deal emotionally doesn't mean I haven't also made similar discoveries. It doesn't mean I haven't been I therapy nor does it mean I haven't met the right therapist.

I gotta admit I find messages of the kind that most people use to respond annoying and sanctimonious.

Someone in one of these forums told me "just because we lost the weight doesn't make saints out of us".

Agreed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi BayArea12 :-)

I think we met at Dr. Jossart's Monday group mtg. in SF last week. I was the girl in the back who had just had surgery 4 days before. I have been in therapy for depression and binge eating for years. I don't have the time to type up a response right now, but I do have a lot to say on the subject, so I am happy to chat if you like. I will be attending Jossarts Novato mtg. this Saturday if you want to catch up after the meeting.

Also, I remember you asking about hairloss in group. costco is selling a hair and Nails supplement that has 5,000 mg of Biotin in it.

Happy VSG!

**all thumbs from my iPhone**

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LadyVeteran1

      Sleeve surgery is on April 14th.  I am counting the days!!  Can't wait!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • buildabetteranna

      Down 33 lbs and slightly stalled, but I'm gonna reevaluate and push through. I started back to work last week after 2 years of being disabled due to mental health as well as my weight. It's a great job and I'm just so happy to have this opportunity at a second chance at life. Hope everyone is having their best journey ❤️ Together, we got this!
      · 2 replies
      1. DaisyChainOz

        Great work Anna! Keep it up 😁

      2. buildabetteranna

        Thank you ❤️

    • Bashbee91

      Hey guys new to the process looking forward to this new life. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Bugg

      Hi everyone! I’m brand new here. I just went through all my pre-op requirements per my insurance company and now everything has been submitted and I’m just waiting for final approval and my surgery date. I’ve been doing research, watching YouTube videos, TikTok’s, ect.. trying to prepare my mind and what to expect so I’ll be ready for the surgery. I was so sure and so set and so ready and excited. However, now that I’ve done everything & it’s almost here, I am sooooooo scared! I know why I want it bc I’ve tried everything and I just don’t feel like I can lose weight by myself. I’m tired of being overweight my entire life. I’m miserable, but I keep psyching myself out afraid of GERD bc I know how that can be and I don’t want to have to get a bypass after already gaining the courage to even get VSG. I’m scared of complications like I’mgoing to regret doing it and be depressed that I didn’t just be more disciplined and try again to lose the weight on my own even sitting here typing this knowing in my mind i just can’t and don’t possess the discipline. I’m also afraid I won’t be able to handle the restrictions of the sleeve. What do I eat? I don’t know how to eat healthy really and don’t enjoy healthy food. I don’t know how to do this! I feel so defeated!Someone tell me they felt anything similar to this or am I not ready? I thought I was. I am so tired of being sick and tired and so tired of myself and so tired of being stuck and stuck in this body and somebody different on the outside from what I feel inside. I just want to ball up and cry.
      · 1 reply
      1. stevieoriole

        Am feeling this right now. My surgery date is 4/1. Sign the consent tomorrow. I feel like I overloaded myself with too much info, too many opinions. Got to the point where I was wondering if I should do this. Then I thought of my reasons for taking this step and that settled my nerves. Still get moments of doubt but am striving forward. Am just going to follow my book from the surgeon. Joined this because I was told by my dietician that I should do this for support

    • buildabetteranna

      over 20 lbs down since4 the pre surgery diet and surgery on the 14th
      · 1 reply
      1. Selina333

        Yay!! Congrats. I know how good that feels. 🤩

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×