My sister and I need support - NOW!

[CandyB 0]

Sis and I had our fills yesterday morning (Next fill we're insisting on afternoon appts). The doc was able to pull out 1.5ccs, my whole first fill, same for sis - no leakage (whew)!

I think he is trying to work with us. He put 2.5 in, and I was completely blocked. Pulled out .3, still blocked. Pulled out .2, and he thinks it's good restriction (second fill for me). So, I'm at 2.0. Sis is now at 2.75 (third fill for her).

Another good thing - our surgery center's director assisted the surgeon with our fills - HE'S TEACHING HER HOW TO DO THE FILLS! I do feel that the center has begun to respond to the needs of the banded patients. When we had our surgery in February, our center had just been set up. Before that, our surgeon's colo-rectal surgery practice was handling everybody. So, I think things are getting better.

Also, I asked him to numb me this time, and I'm glad I did. I felt squeamish during the first fill. I didn't like the feeling of the needle being moved around while he was finding the right spot to get the saline in. It was much better for me to have the numbing shot, especially since he had to stick me three times to add and pull out saline. This part doesn't bother my sister at all, perhaps because she was a nurse. But I highly recommend numbing before a fill. (Just as I highly recommend an epidural during labor and delivery)!!

Another piece of follow-up: It was so satisfying to have our support group meeting last evening, a helpful ending to a fill-day. Our center's director, again responding to our urging, FINALLY split us into two rooms, bypassers and bandsters. She arranged for two INAMED reps to be there and a 13-month bandster for us to barrage with questions. It was a very, very helpful meeting. We finally felt safe and comfortable in asking our nitty-gritty questions - all of the band intricacies that the bypassers don't deal with. We truly were wasting each other's time when the meetings were not separated. Our director had us fill out a questionnaire about the split, and I think she really gets it now: WE WANT OUR OWN MEETING! The INAMED people were adamant about our insisting on it.

I think the most important reason for the bypassers and the bandsters to have separate meetings (and this came to me last night) is that, although we all chose WLS, and I love every one of the people in the group who have made this courageous choice, we chose different paths, and the individuals in each group need to feel that we made the right choice for ourselves.We need to feel good about choosing the band. They need to feel good about choosing the bypass. We need to be allowed to "band together". We need to feel free to talk about why we chose the band and not the bypass and vice versa. We need to be able to discuss the difficulties of each process, the downsides of each process without feeling like we're hurting the other guys feelings, or even expressing doubts about our own choices. The bypassers need to be able to rejoice in their amazingly fast weight loss. The bandsters need to be able to rejoice in the ways we feel our surgery was a better choice for us. I know we're all adults and can handle these differences, but it is a very primitive need to feel that your own group is best - it is called ethnocentrism. ( I admit it - I was an anthropology major, and I love the fact that I actually remember terms like this one)!

Back to the meeting:The INAMED reps were interested in what we had to say and could respond to our questions, comments, and frustrations, but they are not banded. They didn't seem to understand the "psyche" of an obese person who has chosen WLS. I guess that's what we all really need - the support of people who understand us on a deep level. Having a successful bandster there completed the support we needed. The INAMED reps could tell us how hard they are working to get our center up to speed for the bandsters. The bandster told us her trials and successes in the last 13 months. She looks fabulous, by the way. Her name is Colleen. She is tall and thin, has lost 105 lbs, and is maintaining at 150 lbs. She is not much of an exerciser, she admitted, but she tries to get some exercise - she likes to ride her bike - although she is trying to get more consistent about her exercise.

So, yesterday was a good day. Now, today, we will find out if we really have restriction. Since yesterday was a liquid diet day, we can't yet tell how each of us will feel . We're hopeful, and, at least, if we decide in a few weeks that we need more restriction, we know that we can get a fill within in a week or two of when we decide we need one. Feeling much better than I was a few weeks ago.

Thanks for reading this looooong post.

candy

[Alexandra 55]

candy, it's so good to read of your good experience!! And I was going to post too about my great support group meeting of the other night. (Did we go to the same support group meeting and just not meet? )

I met Colleen on Wednesday night, when she attended our meeting in Florham Park. She does look great! Gary from Inamed was also there, but he was solo. I've seen him at two meetings now, and think it's terrific that Inamed cares enough to have reps at these meetings. And it's NOT a sales pitch!! Gary is helpful and instructive, patient and compassionate. Was he at your meeting?

I completely agree about how important it is for bandsters and bypassers to meet separately. We've had three separate meetings now and the group is really growing.

Where was your meeting? We should post this info in the New Jersey section because I know there were people at my meeting looking for things in other parts of the state.

[CandyB 0]

Dear Alexandra,

Our meeting, mostly made up of Dr. Borao's WLS patients and prospective patients, is at Monmouth Medical Center, Long Branch, NJ. We meet on the 4th Thursday each month, from 7 to 9. Anyone interested in joining our group (please do!) can call the surgery center for info: call 732-923-6070. We do have one Dr. Abkin patient who comes to our meeting. She lives in Toms River; so, this one is closer for her. She also likes our meetings.

We had Gary, too, and a woman named Susan at our meeting. Yes, I think it's kind of neat that we USA bandsters are in on the early stages of the band in our country, and we're getting a lot of necesary attention from INAMED who wants to make certain their product is well-supported. Gary and Susan provided a wealth of information supporting our choice to have the band vs. bypass. And I was so comforted to hear that everywhere else in the world, the band is the "gold standard" for WLS. It is only in America that bypass is still considered the "gold standard". Did Gary tell your group that there are bypassers who have gained back their weight and have added a band to their bypass so that they can lose weight? That blew my mind! I always thought it might work the other way around. I feel so good about my choice now.

Thanks for your consistent support,

candy

[Sultana 0]

Hi Sisters,

I cannot offer you words of wisdom or success, but I can offer lots of empathy. I am in the same boat. I was banded 12/29/03, and have lost only 25 pounds. I have had three fills (I am at 2cc), and I feel very little restriction. Sometimes I feel the first few bites go painfully through, but they do go down, and never up. I can still eat anything and lots of it. I get depressed about it too, so I know how you feel. I am having another fill on the 23rd, and I am so hoping this will be the one. My Dr. is conservative with fills; it is her philosopy to have the band a little looser so that there will not be incidents of reflux. I don't disagree with that; I don't see much future in PBing all the time, but I NEED more restriction. Lately I find myself avoiding this site, which is not good. I am always happy for the success of others, but when I read about all the weight loss, I feel like a band failure. I try so hard to eat right, and I exercise. I am trying to believe that I am just not restricted enough, and that I am one of those who just needs more restriction. Luckily, my Dr. seems to be willing to work with me. Why don't you contact Inamed about fill data that you can present to your Dr.? I am sure that it is not the same for everyone. I am glad that you have each other!! My doctor does not do fluoro, but last time she did withdraw all the saline, and said that it was all there. Did your dr. do that to check for a leak?Please keep me posted, especially if you get some cheerful news.