loss of social life

[jayzer 0]

I am being sleeved tommorow and I am not afraid of the surgery but starting to fret over the loss of my social life. Most always friend get togethers are over food and alcohol or dinning out.. My husband and I are weekend social drinkers, we have a boat and drinks throughout the day have become a norm. Its a good thing that I am 53 for I see it would be more difficult as a young woman in her 20's in todays society. We like to travel and go to places that are all inclusive but it looks like that would be a waste of money. Please help me with some tips on how to drink and eat sleeved yet still be safe.. I know it will be several months before I will even begin to experiment but If youve had similar experiences I wold like to hear from you.

[phillygirl 1]

I don't think you'll have anything to worry about. I was sleeved 2 months ago and I have been out with my friends socially several times. If you are like me, your entire thinking will change about food and socializing. I order healthy options, bring the rest home and have it later. I really don't want to waste my time eating or drinking ANYTHING that does not have Protein. If you knew me you would know this would never have happened before. It still takes me a long time to drink any liquid. Its a process that you will get used to quicker than you think

[wishes 125]

In my opinion, it isn't that bad, and I am a girl in my 20s. I love my life. My boyfriend and I still go out for sushi (sashimi for me) and out to our favorite bars, but I don't drink and I always go for the Protein options. I agree with the previous poster, you will just take it home. Friday my boyfriend and I went to Chipotle and I had four meals out of that! It is awesome, and drinking won't go away forever.

[lsereno 2,525]

I'm 55 and I love to eat out and have a few drinks. I'm waiting till the 6 month post surgery because that's what my Dr. recommends. I know many people have started having drinks earlier, but I'm most comfortable following my Dr's program. Also, I'm worried about transfer addiction and the way alcohol loosens me up to eat a lot of Snacks, so I'll be monitoring my drinking closely post-op.

I do miss drinking, but I have something fun and I'm always the designated driver now :-) At first, I couldn't have caffeine, so I just had still Water with a splash of cranberry juice when at a bar. Now I have that, coffee, or an iced tea.

For the food, I often order off the appetizer menu, but sometimes I order a full dinner and just take part home. Like others, I concentrate on Protein when eating out, just like at home. I can't eat the soft part of the bread (makes me sick), but I do eat a bite or two off the crust if they restaurant has good bread.

some of my meals:

PF Changs: Lettuce Wraps, tuna Takati, Oolong Marinated Sea Bass

Coastal restaurants: Crab or shrimp cocktail, clam chowder, grilled sardines,

BBQ: Smoked chicken, pork ribs

When you're hanging out on the boat with friends, just make sure you have stuff you can have and that you like and you won't feel deprived (at least I don't!). I like the Diet Lipton Citrus Green Tea when it's hot and I like having a Soy Latte when it's cold (can't tolerate milk since the operation). For Snacks, I eat popcorn, beef stick bites, lite salami, watermelon or cantaloupe or something like that. I have also eaten a few chips or crackers. If everyone is having desert, sometimes I have a bite too. I'm not hungry like I used to be, so I don't eat as much snacks as I used to and I almost never have sweets. A few bites and I'm happy with that.

Lynda

[Indymom 132]

We haven't been eating out a lot just because we're trying to save money for a vacation next year. I do miss drinking socially with friends and I look forward to being able to do so soon (my doc said at least 3-6 months). I was at a concert with my husband on Thursday and actually had some sips of his draft beer (not too fizzy) and honestly, I felt pretty lousy for the following two days. Not hangover lousy, but just something didn't feel "right." I think that was a good sign for me to not rush it and wait until I'm well healed up and closer to goal.

I've read a lot of posters on here who still drink socially and drink a fair amount, especially once they are at goal. I definitely plan for that as I have always been a social drinker (if all my thin friends can manage to do it and still stay thin, I guess I will need to figure out how to do it too!).

[jillw8 22]

I was sleeved 4 weeks ago and you're attitude and thoughts about food will change completely after the sleeve. Your life won't revolve around those things anymore. I even had a bachelorette party and a wedding....still had an amazing time without feeling left out! You will be okay!

[Lakelady 2]

I am SO MUCH more social now than when I was obese! My friend came over today and helped me redecorate my house. We have campfires in the evenings. I go for walks with friends. I cook a lot with friends and enjoy a small amount of the food. I sit at tables and almost nobody knows about my sleeve and nobody notices what I do or don't eat. It all changes and food just doesn't matter now. It's not like going out trying to diet and craving everything-now just a few bites will do you and the rest is just social. I wouldn't have been able to understand before surgery-its all so different and easy now!

I drink socially-sugar just kills me but a glass of wine or whatever is fine!

[Thomas CPA 496]

Agree with many others, once you have the surgery you will not miss the eating. Think about, right now the food and drink are controlling your social life. Once you get rid of that you will be in control of the food and drink. Suggest start reducing the drinking now so you will have easier time later. Like getting off cigarettes or anything else just need to make commitment.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

Just be prepared that alcohol affects us differently now with the miniature tummy.

The first time I had a drink , I was really surprised how much I felt it!

[dramagirl28 22]

I am a month out and I do miss drinking with friends. I have gone out to bars a few times and I just don't have a good time because I don't feel like myself. HOWEVER, I know that this is only temporary and I will be able to drink again, so I'm not down about it too much.

As far as dining out goes, I'm still on mushy food and there aren't a whole lot of options out there for me right now besides Soup. I went out to Breakfast the other day and ordered a scrambled egg with cheese and it really hurt my tummy for about an hour after only two or three bites. I think it was just too greasy. But I anticipate that once I'm on solids and have gotten the hang of eating, it'll get easier. Again, this is only temporary.

I did go through a little depression for a bit right after surgery about the whole social thing, but I feel better about it now and I certainly don't regret getting sleeved at all. You just have to imagine a new normal. It's hard to believe, but it will come.

[Tiffykins 673]

It's really just a temporary situation. Once you lose your weight, and can tolerate the social aspects and behaviors with food and alcohol, an active social is an extremely realistic goal.

I just didn't waste my "honeymoon" with alcohol and social life. I ate out with my friends, but I chose healthier options, and learned that I enjoyed the experience, friendship, fellowship far more than the food.

Once I was at goal, I introduced alcohol back into my life. The first few times I drank, it did hit me hard and fast then I sobered up fast. Not a lot of fun, but a few months in, maintaining a good buzz was not difficult. I have a very active social life, and socially drink. Obviously, I haven't in pregnancy, but before pregnancy, I was a social drinker and would tie one on monthly with my girlfriends.

[To Be Thin 2011 80]

Wow, this one is a tough one because I can see it from both sides. I am 50, my husband and I lived for fun on the weekends with our friends. Alcohol was very much part of our social life. My surgery was January and I totally stayed away from any alcohol for 6 months per doc recommendation.

It was very different being around the same group of friends, being out on the boat, or camping with our friends without drinking. I did it because I was determined to follow doc advise and like Tiff said above, I did enjoy just being with my friends and hanging out,,, the fellowship of being with friends!

Then I tried crystal light with cherry flavored vodka and loved it.. Now I am “almost” at 9 month mark and I have allowed drinking to back into my weekend activities…not smart.. I regret it and my slow weight loss is reflecting it. Summertime boating and camping is done now where I live and I have vowed to get back on track of no alcohol until I reach goal…

In hindsight I wish I had never touched the stuff until I reached goal because it does bring in sloppy eating habits as well. For me... although my doc said I could drink after 6 months.. I wish I never had.

[DoOver 17]

Regarding the all inclusive part, that might be an area where you have to make a change. But there are a lot of great non-all inclusive spots. My hubby and I are planning a spring trip back to Europe. He loves traveling there, I'm pretty much just along for the ride. I am already planning to take 2 Protein Snacks each day to get me 30 grams. Then I will have a Breakfast with an egg or cheese and just nibble off his lunch and dinner, a few bites. It will actually be cheaper than our previous trips. There are a few spots we are familiar with where we will have dinner and I'll take the left over back to the hotel for an evening snack. It's really very managable, but I can see where you would not want to pay for drinks and meals up front for a regular person's consumption.

Also wouldn't hurt to check to see if any of them offer bariatric packages. So many people are having this surgery, you never know. Maybe they're offering an all inclusive mini. It would be a smart move for them to market something like that where you have 3 small meals + maybe 3 drinks per day.