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Do They Think I'm an Idiot?



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Wow, am I the only one that doesn't see anything wrong with what Catracks mom said?

Lots of moms tell their kids "be sure that this is what you want to do" when major events are about to happen. She also acknowledged that Catracks doesn't take things lightly. That's a compliment in my book.

I have to agree with you, Longer-life. As a mom I would probably say the same thing to my kids--just encourage them to be sure it is right. She didn't say, "Boy, are you a jerk. What the heck are you doing?"

As far as telling people or not, I came to the conclusion a long time ago that everyone is going to have their opinion based on their own perspective. I understand that people have not researched the surgery like I have, because it is not something they are planning on doing.

If someone is open, we can have a reasonable conversation and I can explain why I have made the choice I have. If not, they are entitled to their opinion, even it it is out of lack of knowledge. But it is my body, my life and my choice. The only opinions that matter to me are my family's as they are the ones who will be affected if something goes wrong.

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It has been a really long time since I took anything my mother says to heart. Unfortunately, I blame a lot of my problems with food on my family and my upbringing. My dad passed away at a fairly early age for these day (71). He was morbidly obese most of his life and had all of the obesity related issues that went along with it. In the end he died of unrelated lung issues but I can't help but think if he had 100lbs less of a body to oxygenate, he would have been around for a little more time. I can't help but wonder how his life would have been different if he had access to this procedure. I haven't been ashamed to tell anyone that asks even though I don't broadcast it. Perhaps it is my age or my place in life. I don't live my life for anyone but myself at this point. Accept it or not I really don't care. I have gotten that second chance at life that so few get, I am taking full advantage. When I was rolling around on the floor with my 6 month old grand daughter least night, it really shows me the gift I have received.

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I think your mom was just doing her job. She trusts you but is a little worried, as she should be! This is major surgery!

I told my mom, and she turned around an told ALL the relatives... I don't mind. A few of them could use the surgery! I have even gotten a few emails asking about and I am happy to answer. I don't volunteer this info, but if people ask, then I tell them. I have to say I have had no real rotten comments from anyone. My two dearest friends were concerned... one is a Dr and said after about 30 seconds of her 2 cents, that she would support any decision I made and keep her bias to her self. The other thought I was just fine the way I was, then after talking a lot about it decided it was a fine decision. So far one person I know got the surgery because I told them about it, and two or three more are looking into it. If I can help them to add a few years onto their lives, then who cares what anyone else thinks. This being said, I think I am surrounded by folks that just don't meddle in others decisions. Perhaps this is cultural, or I don't know what, but some folks here seem to be surrounded by people that are awful busy bodies! Thank heavens my work mates and family and friends are not that way!...(so fartongue.gif)

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Don't get me wrong. As stated, I know she cares, but this stems from old issues. On it's face there is really nothing wrong with what my mother said. It's how she views me as a person -- how she always has and it's never been on the mark.

Also, every person has their own comfort level about who is in the know about the surgery. I personally want people to just see me as becoming more healthy rather than "The girl who got WLS" as SittingPretty said. That may change later. Who knows. I may even blog about it. I'm reading someone's blog from this forum right now and it's helped me to know what I might expect.

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I am an only child and when I told my folks, first my Dad told me he was proud of me and wished me good luck. But my Mom cried for 24 hours. In talking to her the next day I believe she thought I would die having this surgery. I gave her things to read up on the procedure, including how much more dangerous it is if I don't have the surgery (taking high blood pressure and cholesterol meds) and then there are strokes and heart problems that can develop. Also by the next day my Dad was saying he isn't sure that this is the right thing for me. He said I gave Mom to much to read- she is freaking out.

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You must be inadvertently related to me- wonder if we share the same sister in law.. hahaha

Don't you love how a little honesty- just weeds out those overly nosy inlaws?

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I've been talking to my mom about WLS for years about how I'm going to do it one day, she always seemed ok. The other day I told her I talked with the surgeon and am working on the insurance process. And then she didnt want to talk about it. There's a lot of issues. I know she'll be supportive ultimately but she probably feels like I could do it without surgery, even though she never could lose weight and I haven't been able to either my entire life.

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