What to tell people why I am out?

[shellnsons 7]

Hello, what reason did you guys tell your coworkers or certain family members why you would be out of work? I do not want to tell them I am having the Gastric sleeve...

Note: I have some family and co-workers who would research if I tell them I am was having a certain type of surgery they would want to know what kind...I just do not want certain people in my buisness. Any feedback would be appreciated.

Thanks

[kellyw74 258]

Noboday knows I had WLS except my husband. Not even my family!! I don't want to hear the negative comments and ignorant crap that comes out of people's mouths!

You don't have to tell anyone anything. Your work can not ask you any questions if it is medical so just leave it at that if you want. I told them I was having a hernia repair which I was supposed to do, but found out I didn't have one after all!

Best of luck to you!

Kelly

[Soon2BMiniMommy 92]

I did what Kelly did, I told my work/bosses/coworkers that I was having a laparoscopic hiatal hernia repair. It's almost the exact same kind of operation, same recovery time, etc. If you look it up online, it's pretty straightforward and you can just gloss over it. I'm in complete agreement that it's nobody's business...I also don't want to deal with people's biases and negative ignorance!! My body, my business.

Good luck!

[shellnsons 7]

Kelly & Soon Great answers if they ask detail which I hope they don't I will tell them I had hernia repair....Thanks guys...My supervisor is very nosey and wants to be the caretaker of everyone in the dept but she also runs her mouth so I do not feel comfortable telling her at anything..just that I am having surgery..I know it is against the law to ask but she can be persistant..Ugh! LOL

[Forensikchic 528]

Kelly & Soon Great answers if they ask detail which I hope they don't I will tell them I had hernia repair....Thanks guys...My supervisor is very nosey and wants to be the caretaker of everyone in the dept but she also runs her mouth so I do not feel comfortable telling her at anything..just that I am having surgery..I know it is against the law to ask but she can be persistant..Ugh! LOL

I told the people at work that I had a hernia repair too. I did have it repaired at the same time. I also had a kidney stone two weeks later and was hospitalized for another week so they think the early weight loss has to do with having two surgeries in three weeks time. I am not sure what I will say as the weight continues to fall off. I had one ask if I was still on a diet. I said no, just not healthy at the moment (kidney issues). I am not sure what I will come up with after this kidney thing is over! I guess I will tell them I am eating mostly Protein and healthier. I dont want them to know either.

[miz z 0]

At my last shrink appointment, she asked me if I were going to tell people about the surgery and who I would tell. At the time I said I had told a few close friends at work and my boss. One of the things she said was that people will think you're really sick or that there's something really, really wrong with you as the weight starts to come off and they'll become very awkward around you. At the time I too had thought I would go the hernia route, which I also have, but after talking to her, I decided to tell folks the real reason I'm going to be out. I was very nervous about it, but contrary to what I expected, everyone has been extremely supportive and glad for me. I work with a lot of very nice, kind people.

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Hello, what reason did you guys tell your coworkers or certain family members why you would be out of work? I do not want to tell them I am having the Gastric sleeve...

Note: I have some family and co-workers who would research if I tell them I am was having a certain type of surgery they would want to know what kind...I just do not want certain people in my buisness. Any feedback would be appreciated.

Thanks

[immeagain 4]

Shell, I am in the same boat, my co-workers and boss are very nosey, but that is the department I work in in general, we are all up each other's business. I did tell my boss and am keeping my fingers crossed that she won't tell anyone. She is the one I trust the most but otherwise its like high school in there and I feel like they would be judging me and talking about me behind my back (more so than usual) and I don't need their stress. The funny thing is that they are the major fad dieters in there. I never did fad diet because I didn't want to screw me up more than I already was.

Already they are all asking me what is going on, why are you going to dr appts, why are you having surgery (can't keep anything quiet in there, had to tell them something). Didn't have a specific surgery to give them so told them exploratory for gastritis, ibs, and reflux. That is also the reasoning for the pre-op diet (they question everything everyone puts in their mouth in that office).

Other than my boss, my kids, husband and parents and best friend know, that is it and I don't know who I will tell after.... I am so afraid people will say this is cheating, taking the easy way out even though I know it is going to be very hard and very disciplined.

[MeMeMEEE 206]

I told the few I am close to what I was doing, they have been very supportive. I told my boss also, her husband had bypass 10 years ago so she has been great also. Thankfully I work from home and actually everyone in my department with exception of 4 people do so we don't see each other often, once every month or 2. I was out for 4 weeks and on FMLA/STD so I am sure the ones I didn't tell will be nosy the next time I see them - I will tell them the truth. Mostly I wanted to avoid negativity before surgery, no one was going to talk me out of it. I have the benefit of several others in my division who have had bypass this year so hopefully some of the stigma has been broken by them. If not? I just don't care. It's for me and my health.

[immeagain 4]

Thank you Libbe, that is food for thought and maybe after I will change my mind, just not sure. There is a lot of negativity at work and I am not sure I want to deal with the drama but I also agree with what you say!

[RitaBee 0]

I have been wondering the same thing but since my surgery was originally scheduled for this holiday week I was saying I was just taking some extra days off. I have only told my immediate family and a few friends if which one is overly concerned to the point if not wanting me to have it. My body, my life! Don't get me wrong, I am glad that they are concerned but I just wonder if that is all there is to it.

[To Be Thin 2011 80]

Thank you Libbe, that is food for thought and maybe after I will change my mind, just not sure. There is a lot of negativity at work and I am not sure I want to deal with the drama but I also agree with what you say!

Hold firm to what your gut instinct is.... I did not want anyone at my work to know my business. I work in a corporation with 460 employees, 82% women so I am in drama heaven... it is ridiculous the tacky things women can do and say to each other, I did not want to be a part of it. I completed my paperwork for medical leave with the HR dept, and gave a copy to my boss and I explained to him that this is confidential and it is my request it remains confidential. To my co-workers that asked why I was going out I told them I was having surgery to take care of some personal issues, and said no more...trust me quite a few women tried to get it out of me what kind of surgery I was having..... but I would not bend and tell them. These are my co-workers, they do not need to know my most personal business.

When I returned to work I was met with a cold shoulder, some even had attitudes about the work they had to do while I was gone for 'whatever" --- I smiled to myself knowing that this was the exact reason I did not tell them, because they really didnt care about me... they cared about not knowing the latest gossip and how my leave of absence impacted them.

Hold firm to your instincts.... do not tell if your co-workers

[shellnsons 7]

To be thin you are so right Lady!! I will deal with my HR department ONLY in submitting my paperwork and will not go into detail with them either...I will get my doc to write up the paperwork...I work with some petty, catty women and I just do not want the negativity....my family is so judgmental...as well....I know my rights!! I do not have to go into details...Thanks ladies you have helped me a lot

[ButterflyTx 5]

Hello, what reason did you guys tell your coworkers or certain family members why you would be out of work? I do not want to tell them I am having the Gastric sleeve...

Note: I have some family and co-workers who would research if I tell them I am was having a certain type of surgery they would want to know what kind...I just do not want certain people in my buisness. Any feedback would be appreciated.

Thanks

I don't have a reason to explain to people about my personal life. Why do you need to tell them anything? You are an adult and don't owe anyone a reason why. I did tell my employer due to the time off I need for dr visits and the up coming surgery. They are bound by law not to discuss my health or personal issues plus I gave no details. As far as co-workers go I'm not a social person at work which is the best policy, keeps you employed in the corporate world, so I have not and wont be saying anything, it's of no concern to people I work with. As far as family, similar policy. They dont need to know that I'm even off work, not to mention a reason why. I made this choice for me, not anyone else. I'm the one being cut on and having a lifestyle change forever. My mother knows but that's it. If you dont want to it's simple... don't.

[shellnsons 7]

Butterfly agreed. I don't have to tell them anything and I wont! Thanks for your input