Neoteric Verve 65 Posted August 30, 2011 Two words sum up all of my emotions. I worry that this is not the way. I worry about what will become of my relationship. I'm worried my new body will illicit changes in me I never imagined. I worry because the procedure is irreversible. There is no turning back. I'm also worried that if I stay the way I am life will get progressively worse. I'm scared. Scared to stay where I am. Scared to move forward. The closer I get to September the more I worry in silence. I fear this unknown. I'm 36 years old and weigh over 400 pounds. I'll certainly not live a long life at 400 pounds. Not many 400 pound 80 year old men around. This should be enough to keep me focused and motivated. I am worried, nervous, constantly second-guessing this decision. I'm scared.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LaurenKorea 1 Posted August 30, 2011 You owe it to yourself to feel better and look better. Don't be scared, what will happen if you do not lose the extra weight could actually be worse than anything you'd imagine. Please give yourself this chance. Find the strength in you, it's there. 1 Neoteric Verve reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tjharmon 11 Posted August 30, 2011 my post last week was called "backing out" everyone on here let me know that these fears are normal--i feel much more "settled" with my decision now...i hope you get there too Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
weho 103 Posted August 30, 2011 I think it is completely normal to question yourself. For me this was the biggest decision I had ever made in my life. So I spent a lot of time going through the "what if's" for the sake of my family. The day before surgery my husband said that he would support my decision to back out...no questions asked. I was tempted to take him up on his offer! But the reason why I proceeded is because I knew if I didn't that it would be business as usual. Keep gaining weight and putting my health on the line. My mother had a stroke a few years ago and we had the make the decision to take her off life support...I did not want to put my family through that anytime soon if there was something that I could do to help prevent it. I was literally so depressed with myself that I saw this surgery as my way out. Don't get me wrong, I didn't think this was the "magic pill" but I knew that it would be a powerful tool to help me in a way that nothing else could. So when people ask me if I would recommend this surgery to others, I tell them yes...but only if you are to the point of desperation. There have been people who have asked who I feel aren't there yet. This is all just my opinion though. Vst Addict, you sound like you are there. It is SO EASY for me to encourage others to have this surgery because things have been picture perfect for me. But the self doubt and fear before surgery was pure hell. Once I made it through surgery it all seemed like a breeze...dealing with the physical was much easier than dealing with the mental. I wish you the very best in your journey! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
To Be Thin 2011 80 Posted August 30, 2011 Hang in there... many of your concerns and fears have went through my head and weighed on my heart too.... Now, almost 8 months later, being sleeved has been the best descion I have ever made for myself. Good Luck friend... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Neoteric Verve 65 Posted August 30, 2011 I appreciate everyone of you. I still do feel a bit worried. But I'm still over 90% leaning toward getting my Sleeve. So much so that I have considered naming it. Now I do have doubts still about whether or not this is what I am supposed to do. I believe life is a series of cause and effects. Some reactions are positive while others are not. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BetterthanIwasb4 21 Posted August 31, 2011 Who cares about reactions? Your life is at stake! Kick your fear in the butt & do what's best for YOU! 1 Neoteric Verve reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr-Smith 7 Posted August 31, 2011 I have the same concerns and fears, my surgery is 2 weeks out and I'm having trouble sleeping at night. From what I have read, the biggest regret at 1 year out is not getting this done sooner. The recovery and transition will be hard but then again, maybe not as bad as we think. Now about the fear. I have been avoiding thinking about it as much as possible but coming to the boards doesn't help me with that The fear is natural, this is a life altering event. Oh, and us dudes need to stick together, we are the minority here... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Llewigi 0 Posted August 31, 2011 Two words sum up all of my emotions. I worry that this is not the way. I worry about what will become of my relationship. I'm worried my new body will illicit changes in me I never imagined. I worry because the procedure is irreversible. There is no turning back. I'm also worried that if I stay the way I am life will get progressively worse. I'm scared. Scared to stay where I am. Scared to move forward. The closer I get to September the more I worry in silence. I fear this unknown. I'm 36 years old and weigh over 400 pounds. I'll certainly not live a long life at 400 pounds. Not many 400 pound 80 year old men around. This should be enough to keep me focused and motivated. I am worried, nervous, constantly second-guessing this decision. I'm scared.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Llewigi 0 Posted August 31, 2011 Best thing I have ever done. 130 lbs from 360.Still some to go. I am still learning what the new me wants, I wish I had done this 30 years ago. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sassygirl06 962 Posted August 31, 2011 there is nothing that anybody can say that will take these feelings away. they are normal. you have gone this far because you want to change. remember that. change is hard, we fight it tooth and nail, because it is the abnormal for us. you will find this road difficult, and probably scary, but this is the road that you have chosen for a better life. you will make it, just keep going and soon you will know that you have made the right decision. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BetterthanIwasb4 21 Posted August 31, 2011 Great response Sassy! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Neoteric Verve 65 Posted August 31, 2011 Y'all are awesome! I feel better and realize the best way to face the unknown is to charge head on right into it. This is going down in September. I have these feelings because I worry about food. Why? What I do when I get hungry (and only then) is have specific food cravings. This is good. Good because if this hunger thing is greatly diminished then this takes care of the majority of my obesity problems. I feel nervous still but mostly anticipation. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Heart On My Sleeve 0 Posted August 31, 2011 "All of our dream can come true... if we have the courage to pursue them." Walt Disney Two words sum up all of my emotions. I worry that this is not the way. I worry about what will become of my relationship. I'm worried my new body will illicit changes in me I never imagined. I worry because the procedure is irreversible. There is no turning back. I'm also worried that if I stay the way I am life will get progressively worse. I'm scared. Scared to stay where I am. Scared to move forward. The closer I get to September the more I worry in silence. I fear this unknown. I'm 36 years old and weigh over 400 pounds. I'll certainly not live a long life at 400 pounds. Not many 400 pound 80 year old men around. This should be enough to keep me focused and motivated. I am worried, nervous, constantly second-guessing this decision. I'm scared.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peacequeen 434 Posted August 31, 2011 Bless your heart, good luck N2B8R..you can do it. I'm scared too but everyone tells me it's normal so I'm just going with the flow When is your surgery date? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites