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I need an excuse but not a lie



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Thank you peacequeen for your kind words. You can relate to me not wanting to tell the masses. My co-workers already know I'm on a low carb diet and have noticed my weight loss. There are certain people at work who will mention it every day (WLS) in a negative way if they know. I am going to eat less and exercise a lot so I should be lose weight quickly.

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For myself the honest approach works best, but if you must really I would just pass saying you are not feeling well, make it a viral thing, because trust me it will be a bit before you up to par pre op pace.

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I don't see it as an honesty issue,,I see it as it isn't their business issue.

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Hi, I am a walker too I was walking about 5 miles a day 5 day a week and have been for years. I was not up to walking my regular walk for about four weeks post op. A week out as you will be I could only manage a short five minute stroll. I understand not wanting to say anything but you may have to miss more then one walk and you definitely don't want to overdue it.

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It's Saturday, Sept 3rd and I'm 2 days post-op and I feel great. I think I will be able to walk my 2.7 miles by Wednesday. I'm already walking about a mile at a good pace. I love Dr Kelly and his staff!

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Good for you! Glad all went well and welcome to the losers bench. As far as your friend is concerned, do what you feel is best. :)

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This would be radical, but if you are going to need 2-4 weeks before you could resume your regular walk, get ahold of a boot cast for the ankle of your choice. (If you will see her and she will expect to see the boot on your foot ) Tell her you won't be doing your walk from 2-4 weeks, depending on when you get the boot of your ankle. You could tell her the boot is a result of your trip with your sister. Then, when you feel up to walking with her again, vioula! your ankle will be healed and the boot cast put away.

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I don't see it as an honesty issue,,I see it as it isn't their business issue.

Ok, perhaps we can switch out honesty and the work open? It just takes too much energy FOR ME PERSONALLY to keep up the story so to speak. I was just relating FOR ME it is too much. I mean really it is was it is, I have lost more than a person and have been able to provide info to and inspire other via my "openness" So for me and I was sharing only what works for me. I never meant to imply the original poster should do the same.

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What really matters in this scenario is what is right for you. You are doing what you need to do to take care of yourself, and it is totally your choice to share or not to share such personal information.

I am scheduled for VSG on 9/15 in TJ, and only my parents, my son, and my brother know about it. I have yet to tell any of my friends. I may or may not after the procedure, i just haven't decided what i want to do. It has nothing to do with feeling unsupported or being concerned about others reactions. It just a very personal decision that i made after a very long period of consideration, and i still have my own feelings to sort out. For me, right now, i need to look after my own emotions, deal with the major changes ahead for me, and even though i am very secure in my decision to do this, i am still feeling a little overwhelmed by all of it. I don't really want to add the extra emotional energy, good or bad, to my plate right now.

You can be honest with your friend and tell her that you're worn out after your trip and would like to pick up the next week.

The definition of friendship does not include a "share all" clause, and a true friend who really loves you would understand your need to do what is best for you.

Good luck and i hope you are doing well!

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Honey you do not have to tell anyone unless you don't want to.....tell her you will start again next week you are having stomach problems..

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Myrori, I apologize, I didn't mean to make it sound like you were implying anything. I was just stating how I feel based on my own experiences telling my business to my friends and family before the fact of something I had planned on doing. Some people are very lucky, they have super support. My friends and family are supportive in some areas and great people but due to the nature of weight loss surgery in general and it's bad rap it's received in the past..I know some will make it a point to voice their opinion and some being negative. While I'm building my confidence to go through this, I just don't need them telling me I'm making a mistake..and they will. I may tell people eventually but I know they will have to see me actually lose the weight and live to tell the story before they agree with what I'm doing. Again, I'm sorry,,I re read my post and it sounded snappy and I didn't mean for it to.

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    • BabySpoons

      Sometimes reading the posts here make me wonder if some people just weren't mentally ready for WLS and needed more time with the bariatric team psychiatrist. Complaining about the limited drink/food choices early on... blah..blah...blah. The living to eat mentality really needs to go and be replaced with eating to live. JS
      · 2 replies
      1. Bypass2Freedom

        We have to remember that everyone moves at their own pace. For some it may be harder to adjust, people may have other factors at play that feed into the unhealthy relationship with food e.g. eating disorders, trauma. I'd hope those who you are referring to address this outside of this forum, with a professional.


        This is a place to feel safe to vent, seek advice, hopefully without judgement.


        Compassion goes a long way :)

      2. BabySpoons

        Seems it would be more compassionate not to perform a WLS on someone until they are mentally ready for it. Unless of course they are on death's door...

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
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    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
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