I've lost weight and I am afraid

[HDubSleevery 25]

I went on the pre-op diet last Tuesday. It is high Protein and low carb. I am drinking 2-3 Protein shakes a day (with milk) and a "sensible dinner". (Isn't that what those Slim Fast people say? A "sensible dinner"...anyway I digress.)

I decided I would weigh myself only on Fridays. I got on the scale this morning and I had lost 8 pounds! I have been afraid to tell anyone (including posting here). I am terrified of failure. I have failed so many times that I think I have become ashamed of my success. My immediate thought when I saw the number this morning was "This can't be right". It was right because I stepped back on the scale 3 times to prove it.

People have been asking me for most of the day how I have been doing on my diet and I just tell them it is fine. I know they are itching to ask how much weight I have lost and I the answer sits like a lump in my throat. Am I really so afraid of public failure that I can't believe/celebrate my success?

Has anyone else gone through this? It feels like I am not giving myself a chance to succeed because I am so tired of failing.

I hope this makes sense.

HDubSleevery

[Sassygirl06 962]

i have felt the same way in the past, even not telling people of my diet for fear of failure, which was inevitable before. i wouldnt worry about the numbers right now.soon enough people will start noticing on their own how successful you are.

[FloraBama Girl 116]

That is awsome. Stop that negative thinking and focus on the positive with your weight loss. If you were a failure you would not be trying to go down this road. Best of luck to you.

Stephanie

[MeMeMEEE 206]

I have felt the same, about 8 years ago I went on weight watchers at work and in the end got to goal, 75 lbs lost. I was so proud, everyone was proud of me. We moved to FL the year after I made goal and I gained 20 lbs. Still not a bad weight for me, size 12. I was so ashamed when I came home for visits! Then we moved back to IL about 4 years ago and complete failure - gained all back plus 35 lbs. Even more shame, So when I decided to do this I only told people who were like minded - wanting to lose weight, struggling, etc. I had my sleeve Monday and pretty much the cat is out of the bag - read: Facebook and anesthesia don't mix LOL Well I just simply asked for prayers around my surgery time, nothing specific. I was so worried someone would try and talk me out of it (my mom and husband already tried). I have only run in to one naysayer as of today and she just "could never do anything that drastic" - I understand, I said the same for years. I'm not even 40 (this year) and when I noticed myself getting winded or breaking out in a sweat doing simple house work, I knew it was time for drastic. I have found support from people I would never has guessed and this thrills me. I have had people ask me how much I have lost and I simply explain to them they advised me not to weigh until my post op visit due to IV Fluid retention. I peeked and I have gained a few pounds from that but no worry. I have put them off for a few weeks anyway!! Maybe by then they won't bother to ask and my success will speak for itself. I believe there isn't really failure at this, more just the levels of success. Doctors consider less than 50% excess weight lost a failure but I would be thrilled if I lost only 45 lbs. I would be better off than I was. That is success to me.

[HDubSleevery 25]

I have felt the same, about 8 years ago I went on weight watchers at work and in the end got to goal, 75 lbs lost. I was so proud, everyone was proud of me. We moved to FL the year after I made goal and I gained 20 lbs. Still not a bad weight for me, size 12. I was so ashamed when I came home for visits! Then we moved back to IL about 4 years ago and complete failure - gained all back plus 35 lbs. Even more shame, So when I decided to do this I only told people who were like minded - wanting to lose weight, struggling, etc. I had my sleeve Monday and pretty much the cat is out of the bag - read: Facebook and anesthesia don't mix LOL Well I just simply asked for prayers around my surgery time, nothing specific. I was so worried someone would try and talk me out of it (my mom and husband already tried). I have only run in to one naysayer as of today and she just "could never do anything that drastic" - I understand, I said the same for years. I'm not even 40 (this year) and when I noticed myself getting winded or breaking out in a sweat doing simple house work, I knew it was time for drastic. I have found support from people I would never has guessed and this thrills me. I have had people ask me how much I have lost and I simply explain to them they advised me not to weigh until my post op visit due to IV Fluid retention. I peeked and I have gained a few pounds from that but no worry. I have put them off for a few weeks anyway!! Maybe by then they won't bother to ask and my success will speak for itself. I believe there isn't really failure at this, more just the levels of success. Doctors consider less than 50% excess weight lost a failure but I would be thrilled if I lost only 45 lbs. I would be better off than I was. That is success to me.

Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. I did weight watchers too with success. I lost 70 pounds and swore I would never go back to the "old me". Four years later I had gained it all back plus some more. I am at my highest all time weight. I think it is worse to have been healthy and regained than to never have been healthy at all. I gave myself a taste of what my life SHOULD be and blew it.

I'm back on the right track in every other part of life except my weight. This surgery is my last hope to really get it right forever.

[MeMeMEEE 206]

You said it!! It's is hard to have that taste and blow it!!

Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. I did weight watchers too with success. I lost 70 pounds and swore I would never go back to the "old me". Four years later I had gained it all back plus some more. I am at my highest all time weight. I think it is worse to have been healthy and regained than to never have been healthy at all. I gave myself a taste of what my life SHOULD be and blew it.

I'm back on the right track in every other part of life except my weight. This surgery is my last hope to really get it right forever.