On the fence

[Shemy-away 83]

Hey everyone,

I haven't posted much, but I lurk here quite often. I'm sitting in front of my laptop with a manometry tube down my nose, an uncomfortable lump in my throat, pain from gallstones, and anxiety because my pre-op is a week away. I was so motivated, exercising, changing my diet, doing everything they told me to. I'm strong, I'm smart, I know I can do anything I set my mind to, except lose weight on my own. And that, the fact that I can do anything but lose weight, is what is terrifying me about going through with this. The what if's. What if I go through with loosing over 70% of my stomach forever, with nothing to show? What if I subject myself to all this pain, torture, medical tests, a lifetime of not being "normal" to lose only 30 pounds? I know I'm in that pre-game jitter phase, and I recognize the crazy, self-doubting talk, but its starting to win and I need a little help.

[Deakay 15]

we all have doubts......I still think I am losing slowly, but I am convinced at least what I have lost is really and truly gone forever. And here is a really big secret.......I would lose more if I made more of an effort and actually got off my ass and exercised like I did before my surgery, but I'm NOT mentioning that to my surgeon. lol He is happy with my loss the way its going

[Shemy-away 83]

Thanks for the encouragement! being able to exercise is one of the things I look forward to doing once some of this weight is gone.

we all have doubts......I still think I am losing slowly, but I am convinced at least what I have lost is really and truly gone forever. And here is a really big secret.......I would lose more if I made more of an effort and actually got off my ass and exercised like I did before my surgery, but I'm NOT mentioning that to my surgeon. lol He is happy with my loss the way its going