Getting a little scared

[CCinINdiana 9]

Less then two weeks from now I will be sleeved. So far I've been excited, but the last two days fear is beginning to set in. I am suppose to start high Protein, low carbs the week before surgery. I decided to jump start it this week. I also decided to give up diet coke, which I live on. Well I did great the first two days of no carb, by yesterday I was like, why am I doing this a week early and had a craving for pancakes. Had pancakes for dinner. I was stuffed and I realized how much I love that full feeling. There is some kind of sense of security feeling full. Then tonight for dinner I also over loaded on carbs. I again had that stuffed feeling. It scares me. What if I can't do this? What if my compulsion to over eat is stronger then the restriction the sleeve provides? Ten years ago I went to a eating disorder program and gave up flour and sugar. I relapsed on the flour about 7 years ago, but thankfully have never started eating sugar again. I'm just so scared about it all. For the last six months I've been in "hypertension crisis" where out of no where my blood pressure will jump up to 225/118. I am currently on 3 blood pressure medications and fortunately its been pretty normal the last month or so. When my blood pressure is high I have no energy and feel physically sick. I have two young children and need to be healthy. That is what has prompted me to start this entire process. Anyway I think I am probably rattling, three days without caffiene is making me a little foggy. Not sure what I am asking for here, maybe just others to say they've felt the same way and have gotten through it and been successful with their sleeve. Cathi

[GreginMI 76]

I felt that way before surgery. I used to LOVE to eat. And I mean I could put it away and like you, I felt great after stuffing my face. All I can tell you is what the surgery did for me. What it did was totally reset my system. The thing is that I have had ZERO physical hunger since the surgery. None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. I have to actually remind myself to eat because I could honestly go all day without eating anything and be perfectly happy. But that isn't healthy. I try to get my Proteins in every day. Where food used to occupy my thinking all day, now I hardly give it much thought at all. It's amazing. I still have a full feeling when I eat but it's much different. Once in a while I get head hunger and miss sitting down and being able to eat a 22 oz. Porterhouse steak or a double bacon cheeseburger, but those moments are fleeting. I guess you go through a mourning period for food. That's fine, though. I've lost 45 lbs so far including the pre-op diet and I'm only 4 weeks out from surgery. The weight loss outweighs any desire I have to eat a huge amount of food anymore. I am so happy I did this and I know you will be too. Good luck to you!

[mnbsleeve 87]

HI Cathi, I had a lot of second thoughts before surgery. I would fluctuate between feeling confident and freaking out. People on this board helped me to see that just about everyone goes throught the sampe process. Like the other person that posted, I don't feel intense hunger or craving, but I have had some hunger. The thing is, it tends to resolve quickly. I'm just out 4 weeks on monday and I am in the mushies stage. I am ready for more "real" food BUT, I don't have that experience of gnawing hunger that won't let you think. I also don't get that super full feeling since, if you get clos,e it becomes more of a discomfort than a comfort. So I eat slowly and pay attention to my body. I'm starting to feel so normal that I noticed at times a tendency to take off eating much faster, but I stop mysel. I would have to describe this phase for me as more of "using my head" to take in nutrition. From others I know things really normalize much more as time goes on. It is a process though. I hope this somewhat helpfull to you! I can tell you that your fears and concerns are totatlly normal and very much like lots of people here. Good luck to you. We will all be rooting for you!!!

PS: I hope you're checking out YouTube. There are lots of great videos from folks who describe their experiences and talk about what and how much they are eating as they progress throught the stages. Everyone is different!!! and it gives you a sense of the types of things you may experience.

[Bryn Dawson 9]

I have had a similar experience. I have Bipolar II and for me that feeling of being stuffed not only brought security but relief from the bipolar depression for a little while. It has been VERY hard to learn to live without that feeling, but it IS possible. I have learned to feel satisfied (not the same way, but still satisfied) after smaller portions and not feeling stuffed. It also helps that I over-stuffed myself once and was fully conscious of the misery it caused after being on smaller portions for so long (6 month supervised diet.) All I can say is that it IS possible. Every one of us has to find our own motivation to deal with it, and we all have to find our own replacement for that security. Welcome to the world of emotional eating.

Know that you can do it. It is not impossible.