Excited, Scared, Embarrassed,Anxoius

[thinkinthin 1]

Hello all,

From my title you can see I am experiencing many emotions. I assume this is normal. I have contemplated this surgery for 4 years. I have researched and went to 3different doctors and chickened out 2 times. I always thought I dont weight THAT much I can loose this on my own. Then I would diet and gain more than I lost every time. I am5 ft tall and weight 204 today. I was finally approved and had my endoscopy done this morning. I am still confident that I am doing the right thing for me. My battle is that most people look at me and say, your not that fat, your crazy why would you do something this drastic? I laugh at them and just say that I know this is right for me. I dont want to continue with the yo-yo dieting and ending up weighing more and increasingly becoming very unhealthy. My energy level is very low. I am a couch potato. I work FT but at the end of the day I just veg.. I have a 10 year old already showing some signs of unhealthy eatiting and is in the 90th percentile for his age and weight. I want to have the energy to keep him active. So I am doing this for me and for him. Is that unhealthy thinking? Anyway I am scheduled for the Sleeve July 11. And am struggling with this pre-op diet. I have this terrible headache and slightly dizzy. Has everyone stuck strickly to this 2 week preop plan. I know this is a lifestyle change and I am committed to the long term efforts, It is just that I cant take ecedrin for the headache and tylenol does not work. I just feel like I need to eat.... Support is what I need. My BFF is very upset that I am doing this. I think it is because she knows she is going to loose her eatting buddy. My husband is supportive but scared of the extreme of it. And I refuse to tell my In Laws they are so opinionated. Well I willl continue later with my journey. Just feeling Excited, Scared, Embarrassed and Anxious!!!

[mamamckinzie 92]

Thinkthin,

I know how you feel...I have felt the exact same way. I am 5 ft 6in (used to be 5ft 7 lol!) and I weight 199lbs. I too am sick and tired of all the yo yo diets..tried everything 2, 3, 4 or more times. After much research decided that the sleeve was the best tool available to me. I know if I were to tell people that I do not have the utmost trust in I would probably hear the "oh, your not that fat....you could do it with diet & excercise, etc. The thing is you and I know better. We know what our journey has been and we cannot expect other to understand. You are ready for this journey this time around and you have a great support network here with us! I will have my EGD tomorrow (Friday) Psych on tues & Nut on Wed. Then I will find out my surgery date. Good luck...be strong..and remember you are making a healthy choice for you!

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Take it one day at a time. My BMI was around 36.5 or so when I started and did not need to lose weight on a pre diet. You are doing it for the right reasons... just be careful you dont lose too much weight for your insurance requirements... most say if you are under 35 BMI you are out of luck.

[AutumnBlueCarmen 4]

I think all those emotions are Normal! I'm so very anxious today. I'm 5'3" and 230 right now. I feel a lot the same as you. I know I could probably lose weight again, but I've done it so many times before....I know I'll never have the will power to keep it off on my own without having the sleeve as a tool. I'm at my highest weight...but I've gone up to 199 and down to 165 many times over the last 15 years and then when I stop doing the work...it all comes back on. It is hard work and the Sleeve will help those like us so much. I JUST CANT WAIT TO GET MY APPROVAL!!! IS IT NEXT THUR YET????? LOL I can't wait to see your progress!

Good luck!

[thinoneday 445]

Hi there and congratulations on your decision! Your going to be so happy you did this. . . well now to your problem. . on the 5 day pouch test it states that you can have a little bit of carbs if your headaches are too bad, but carbs in good forms like an orange or banana or apple sauce. But just 1 not the whole bowl. . . lol. . . try some coffee as well along with the tylenol, that may help a bit too. . .good luck I know it's hard, but it's only temporary!

[Nancy Rivers 24]

Welcome to the forums and congratulations on making the decision! What you are feeling is completely normal. We all go through the gambit of emotions. You're doing it for the right reasons - to get yourself healthy for you and so you can be a good example for your son. There's absolutely nothing wrong with those reasons.

Since you are on the 2 week pre-op diet - it sounds like you might be going through carb detox. Some people experience headaches and such the first few days of their 2 week pre-op diet because it is very typically high Protein, low fat, low carb diet and in direct opposition to how we have been eating for years. The headache will eventually go away. Do not take Excedrin - it's an NSAID which is a no-no the 2 weeks prior to surgery since it can thin your blood. Excedrin Migraine is the only medication that seems to touch my Migraines, so I'm really hoping that I don't get one in the next 2 weeks.

The pre-op diet may be "torture" but it's for a good reason and it is a relatively short time in the great scheme of things. Stick to your diet as much as possible - it will help slim down your liver so it is easier for the surgeon to work around (much less chance of the surgeon accidentally cutting it). It will also give you some practice for eating after the sleeve.

I'll be having my sleeve done the day after you. We can do this together!

[KellyL 173]

:welcome:

Hi, welcome, and congrats on your decision to take a positve step towards your health and quality of life. I think your feelings are very natural, I know I had the same feelings. I look forward to your updates and sharing this journey with you.

[RSREED53 4]

You are doing this for YOU!!! That is a great goal. Stay focused on this factor. Those that doubt your intentions are just jealous, and uncertain about your successes--show them otherwise. I had my revision a month ago. Doing great with it. Took me 4 years to get it. Glad I had it done! Hang in there. We are here to support each other. Ronda

[SKCUNNINGHAM 298]

Congratulations on your decision. You are doing the right thing, IMHO. I am also 5' 4". Back in 1987 I also weighed 204 and lost down to 118 through modifast. Three years later, I was back up to 180 and went on modifast again and lost back down to 130 (needed surgery). In the mid 90's I was back "up" in weight again, and went on basically a doctor supervised south beach with a ton of minerals and supplements. Lost well - till I got tired of taking 80 pills a day. I gained everything back and was up to 237 in 2002. Over the next 9 months I lost 103 pounds with a high Protein low carb diet with the help of a hypnotist and becoming a serious gym rat. Great way to lose weight, but when I quit listening to my hypnosis CD's and had a car wreck that prevented me from exercising, I started gaining weight again. My sleeve was on 2/22 of this year (took me a year to get approved). My highest weight was 262 - last September. DON'T chicken out this time - don't do what I did and spend years losing and gaining, losing and gaining. As some blonde weight guru that used to be on television would say "Stop the Insanity". I really hope you go through with the surgery.

The sleeve provides us a tool for much more than losing weight (although it is OUTSTANDING for that purpose). The sleeve provides us a tool to KEEP THE WEIGHT OFF for life. That is what I need.

I think your headache is due to withdrawing from sugar, white carbs and caffeine. I had a headache most of my two week pre surgery diet. It does go away. I consoled myself during that time with a quote my trainer used to tell me "Pain is a sign of weakness leaving the body." I would tell myself it was making me stronger for the fight ahead of me. And I think your desire for food is as much caused by wanting the comfort food brings you as in any real hunger you are feeling. Food was my "go-to solution" for everything I felt. Now I get comfort from the great feeling of control I have. If I get hungry, I go try on clothes I haven't worn for years, or take my measurements, or try on rings and bracelets that fit for the first time in years.

Didn't mean to write a book. Good luck.