Hubby wants bypass but I don't

[420gal 1]

My husband and I are both seeking WLS. Our doctor recommended the sleeve for me and gastric bypass for hubby. We both have to lose about 100 pounds each.

Here's the problem: I am terrified about hubby getting gastric bypass. I really want him to have the sleeve. Even though I keep coming to him with research and facts about the complications with bypass, food restrictions, etc....he doesn't care. He read somewhere that bypass patients tend to lose more weight than sleeve patients and that's all he cares about.

I know it's a personal and individual decision and I'm trying to be the supportive wife, but I'm so worried for him. I'm going with him to his second appt tomorrow to ask the doctor why he suggested the bypass over the sleeve for hubby.

Should I be trying to convince hubby to be sleeved or keep my mouth shut and let him go ahead with the bypass?

Thanks in advance!

[feedyoureye 3,087]

My husband and I are both seeking WLS. Our doctor recommended the sleeve for me and gastric bypass for hubby. We both have to lose about 100 pounds each.

Here's the problem: I am terrified about hubby getting gastric bypass. I really want him to have the sleeve. Even though I keep coming to him with research and facts about the complications with bypass, food restrictions, etc....he doesn't care. He read somewhere that bypass patients tend to lose more weight than sleeve patients and that's all he cares about.

I know it's a personal and individual decision and I'm trying to be the supportive wife, but I'm so worried for him. I'm going with him to his second appt tomorrow to ask the doctor why he suggested the bypass over the sleeve for hubby.

Should I be trying to convince hubby to be sleeved or keep my mouth shut and let him go ahead with the bypass?

Thanks in advance!

Its good you will be going to his Dr apt to ask questions. You might ask your husband to check out this website too... There are lots of posts on this site that list the reasons to get the sleeve over RNY... Check out tiffykins... she has made some great lists... Like you say, in the end it is his personal choice...

[former_vbg 198]

My husband and I are both seeking WLS. Our doctor recommended the sleeve for me and gastric bypass for hubby. We both have to lose about 100 pounds each.

Here's the problem: I am terrified about hubby getting gastric bypass. I really want him to have the sleeve. Even though I keep coming to him with research and facts about the complications with bypass, food restrictions, etc....he doesn't care. He read somewhere that bypass patients tend to lose more weight than sleeve patients and that's all he cares about.

I know it's a personal and individual decision and I'm trying to be the supportive wife, but I'm so worried for him. I'm going with him to his second appt tomorrow to ask the doctor why he suggested the bypass over the sleeve for hubby.

Should I be trying to convince hubby to be sleeved or keep my mouth shut and let him go ahead with the bypass?

Thanks in advance!

At the end of the day this is an individual choice, but as his spouse you should take the extra step like you already have in trying to show him the pitfalls of the GB. The only other thing I can suggest is to try and get him to visit the www.obesityhelp.com website. Here is the link that is a forum that talks about complications- but it covers all surgeries. The thing that you or your husband might notice is very few people show up in there with issues from the Sleeve. Can't say the same thing about the GB. I wish you luck.

http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/complications/

[KellyL 173]

That's exactly what I was about to ask, why bypass for him?? Weird. Let your hubby know he will lose faster and easier regardless, cuz he's a man and they always lose better than us!!!!(no fair!!)

And you probably already have pointed out the regain ppl have with bypass, so it defeats purpose of putting yourself at more risks to lose a little more, if that's gonna come back anyway. But he will always be stuck with malabsorbing Vitamins and nutrients. His tummy won't be able to ever be scoped. He will have to fight the hunger hormone with a tiny pouch that stretches easier than the sleeve. This part alone makes the sleeve way more attractive!!! I understand your concern! Good luck!

[chef neil 25]

Hi-

My wife had RnY and I am sleeved.

two people seeking a better life- two different avenues- same destination...

she is very happy and well adjusted 6 months out, I am not, 11 days out.

I have had a hard time eating and drinking...

Support him!

In the end you both will be eating the same diet.

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Hi-

My wife had RnY and I am sleeved.

two people seeking a better life- two different avenues- same destination...

she is very happy and well adjusted 6 months out, I am not, 11 days out.

I have had a hard time eating and drinking...

Support him!

In the end you both will be eating the same diet.

In all fairness Neil, you will be happy and well adjusted at 6 months as well.... Im sure she wasn't 100% at 11 days....

[ybnormal 21]

Just like you, he gets to make his own choice as this is his body and the rest of his life that he has to deal with. Like ChefNeil said, at the end of the day, y'all will likely be eating the same way anyway. Also, don't stress. Dr. Aceves told me he can convert the RNY to the sleeve with a revision if the person so chooses or if they stretch their pouch out and gain the weight back. Maybe the sleeve sounds too permanent to him? I mean come on, it's scary thinking omg...my stomach will be GONE! No turning back from that! So maybe for your husband it's a little too drastic for his taste. Everyone's weight loss is individual and you get out what you put into it so he may do just fine with the rny and you, better with the sleeve, who knows?

Don't stress and try not to stress him out over this. let him know that since it's a malabsorption issue though, he will have to go in for lab work every few months (I think for the first year but not sure about that).

Renee`

[former_vbg 198]

Just came across a posting about some people who had to have their RNY's reversed due to severe health issues from the surgery.

http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/complications/4400639/2-5-years-since-I-had-my-RNY-REVERSED/