Tough Texan/scared to death

[Tex 1]

50 ex college football player. 5'11" and 260. Two kids 5 &13. High blood pressure, sleep apnea, high cholesterol and diabetic on meds Sleeve scheduled with dr Kim on 7/21. I am scared to death.

[iegal 460]

Hi Tough Texan;

You are tough, because you can admit you are scared. Totally normal response. This is elective surgery with minimal risks. You have done your homework, researched your surgeon, VSG surgery with pro's and con's. This surgery will change your life. Not always an easy road walk as you will be relearning how to eat, drink and reevaluate your lifelong relationship with food.

Good news - you need to turn that fear into excitement. Since you played sports, you know you can use that adrenaline for good. Think of this as the weeks before a start of a new season. You will go through hell week...aka your pre-op diet. Then you will practice often to learn new skills over and over until you know them by heart without consciously thinking about making a move. You will slow down when you eat, you will chew 20 times before swallowing. You will diligently watch to make sure you are hydrated well. You will take supplements’ to ensure you are healthy.

Be thrilled that you can win by a big (weight) loss with the sleeve.

[Tex 1]

Thanks for your reply. I've been reading this forum for weeks before posting. Dr Kim requires a 3 week liquid diet. God knows that's going to be tough on me. He told me in over 2000 sleeves he has had one leak and it's because he is so conservative. That makes me feel better. I'm a muscular guy and I don't look like most people with a bmi of 37. I'm doing this because of my risk factors and my kids. I would enjoy getting my breath back and being able to get rid of the stupid mask I have to sleep with. My wife and I are very close. She is not on board for this. I think it's fear on her part.

[KristeyK 3]

I am sure she will be on board once it is all said and done. It's natural for us girls to be scared for our guys...the reverse is true too. However, we Texans are strong people and you'll be successful.

As for your anxiety, address what it is that is making you feel the way you do. I know we ALL have that niggling feeling that we might die, but to be scared to death about it, it sounds like there MIGHT be more. (Sorry, getting all nurse-y on you here, LOL!) I know it could sound a little strange, but grab a notebook or a journal and write down your fears. Then write down your reasons for doing the surgery to give you a little perspective on your fears. Also, once you do have your fears on paper, it'll make it possible to address them with your Dr. (Or if you're required to talk to a psychologist, that'd be a GREAT place to bring them up!!!)

Good luck! If you can live through college football, you will live through this.

(And now I have to be nosy, which school did you go to?)

[Tex 1]

You kind ladies are appreciated more than you know. My fear is very simple. I'm afraid something is going to go wrong and I'm never gonna see my kids again over elective surgery. Get up off your lazy rear end and exercise and eat right and do it yourself. I guess a little part of me feels bad for needing help. Help that although has a low risk could be the end of me.

[KristeyK 3]

If only it WAS as simple as get off your rear and do it. If it was, we'd all have a BMI of 23-25 and perfectly happy with ourselves.

Sure, there are risks with surgery. However, if you're in the Dallas or Houston area, you take a HELL of a much bigger risk getting into that car and driving on the freeways everyday. You can research and find EVERY horror story about any kind of surgery out there, but the beauty of lap. surgery is that as far as surgical procedures are concerned, it's fairly safe.

The BIGGEST risk we will all face is actually anesthesia, and if you're like EVERY OTHER college football player I know- you've had knee and/or ankle surgery and already know whether or not you have adverse reactions to it. Your #2 risk is wound infection...that's easy. Be bossy and make anyone who comes near your incisions was her/his hands before they touch it. Also make sure he/she is wearing gloves. Your #3 risk would be a leak, but those are not very common at all. Just make sure you listen to your nurse when she gives you the rundown of what to look for when she gives you your discharge orders. (For instance, if you develop a fever of 101 or higher that doesn't resolve with Tylenol or Ibuprofen within a couple hours...GET TO THE HOSPITAL!!!!) The other thing that can be a risk factor sounds silly, but it happens a LOT...don't try to get up the first couple times without help. You may think you feel fine, but if you get up too fast, it can cause dizziness, which could cause you to fall and hurt yourself. (And really, who wants a sore abdomen AND a broken hand/stitches in your head/broken ankle/whatever else you could injure by falling.)

There are other risk factors involved, but those are the ones that top the list of what we'd watch for in the hospital. Also, don't try to be a hero and suffer through your pain. If the meds aren't working for you- TELL YOUR NURSE! She'll call your Dr and get you something that'll work better for you. We don't want to see people in pain, it'll prolong your healing.

I hope this helps you out at least a little. Gotta take care of my fellow Texans!!!!

KK (Who hopes to one day get back to the best state there is!)

[iegal 460]

HA HA - if I could have lost the weight without surgery for long term results, I certainly would have. Have you failed at diets often only to regain the weight, repeatedly? This is not about lack of will power or the lack of strength to avoid food. Without my sleeve, my health would have gone downhill rapidly. Sure, I was lower BMI than you but every year that BMI ticked up just a little more, putting me at higher risk for serious health issues.

Your wife sounds like she adores you and is worried. Have her read the success stories, look at before/after pictures and NSV (non scale victories). Reassure her you are not doing this to change for the sake of physical appearance alone but are choosing to take a small calculated risk to get healthy for the family and yourself. She is a major partner for your success. Find her true concern(s) and address it with her.

[Mick78 1]

It's normal to be scared, but looking at the sh*t you have wrong with you, honestly you can only go up from there. Have you ever seen that movie kellys heros? Just use those positive waves man, no negative waves allowed. Good luck with your surgery.

[Tex 1]

Your a blessing. Thank you. Texas is great but at 260 the summers drives me inside. Every summer when it gets brutally hot my family heads to the angel fire/ Taos area of new Mexico. Even at 260 I'm still strong and like to climb. Last year was the first in 9 years I couldn't make the hike to Williams lake at 11000 feet. It was a wake up call for me. I would bet good money if I could get to 180 I could make that climb three times in one day. Thoughts like that are what keep driving me to not chicken out.

[Tex 1]

Thanks everyone. Damn I'm glad I decided to post.

[KristeyK 3]

SEE?!?!?! Look what happens when you come out of the woodwork. LOL.

With your attitude, and the will to literally climb mountains, you'll do great.

[Tex 1]

I'm gonna rtravel this entire road right here until I hit at least 190. Pre op diet starts 6/30. Stress test to get cardiac clearance is July 7. Surgery is 7/21. As captain pickard would say "engage". The journey has begun.

[Tiffykins 673]

You'll do fabulous, and life without all the crap co-morbidities will be amazing for you and your family ! ! !

Many cheers to you for taking such a huge step toward future health. Dr. Kim ROCKS, I've had several friends go to him for their sleeve, and they all report fabulous experiences. . . I miss Texas so much! ! !

Best wishes Tex ! ! !

[anonynurse 13]

Dr. Kim is one of the very best surgeons out there. You are in good hands.

[KellyL 173]

Way to go on taking the first steps to a better life for you and your family!! Fear is part of the process, you'd be abnormal if you didn't have anxiety! But when all is said and done, and you weigh the pros and cons, the sleeve will win everytime.

The pre-op liquid diet will be rough, but you can do it!! Lean on us for support cuz we've all been there, and we are here to support you!! Keep your eye on the prize my friend, you're gonna do great!!