Feeling of regret.. :( :(

[Tamz 8]

So my sleeve was Thursday, yesterday (Sunday) was my first day home .. and I am feeling regretful about my decision to do this I hate that i feel that way but I do. This is hard I have cried several times since I have been home for not even 24 hrs yet. Its not even the fact that im hungry or want food.. because I really dont have the hunger for it at all. But i am sick of sipping, and not knowing if im sipping enough ... If I put my water/juice/crystal light in a big cup to keep it next to me while im resting.. then I cannot gage how much im drinking. Yet, if I pour it in the 2oz cups.. I have to get up every 1/2 hour and it hurts the wound from where my dr had the leaking tube in It is sore swollen and hurts and I cant tell if that means its leaking or something. He has already removed it so im assuming if it was leaking out i would see it on the bandage but dont know if it could be leaking inside.

I cant tell if im dehydrated.. a few times i have gotten really hot but its gone away... my hand/arm is still swollen where the IV was hooked up... and im paranoid about getting enough walking to make sure I dont get blood clots. I cant get comfortable enough to sleep in the recliner for more than an hour at a time.. and when I do sleep I wake up with a headache because its not comfortable on my neck. Even when I do sleep I am worried that I need to wake up frequently TO FREAKIN SIP. I am sick of bubbles, and pain that i dont even know is gas pain or not... but my stomach is hurting and i feel like i always need to be by a bathroom incase its not just "gas".

I am just hating this........ I am mad at myself that I could not have enough motivation to just work out and eat right and now I am in pain and miserable I know that today is only the 4th day after surgery but I am feeling like the wound should not be hurting this much.

I am so sorry for the venting.. really I am.. I am just having a hard time

[Margaret 4]

You are probably as normal as normal can be for having had this procedure. Every day is going to be easier, I promise! I used a toddler sippy cup and just held onto it all day! I took it for little walks in the yard and around the house I had them everywhere. I didn't worry about the 64 oz for a week or so----just sipped all I could all day. Don't worry quite so much! Just rest, sip and stroll and each day will be easier and easier. Try not to do the negative self-talk. After all, it is a done deal! Think of the clothes you'll be fitting into, the thinner face and "look" you'll have, and DREAM about it! It's so wonderful once the results starting showing up! And they will VERY soon! Be good to yourself. And those are my pearls of wisdom!

So my sleeve was Thursday, yesterday (Sunday) was my first day home .. and I am feeling regretful about my decision to do this I hate that i feel that way but I do. This is hard I have cried several times since I have been home for not even 24 hrs yet. Its not even the fact that im hungry or want food.. because I really dont have the hunger for it at all. But i am sick of sipping, and not knowing if im sipping enough ... If I put my water/juice/crystal light in a big cup to keep it next to me while im resting.. then I cannot gage how much im drinking. Yet, if I pour it in the 2oz cups.. I have to get up every 1/2 hour and it hurts the wound from where my dr had the leaking tube in It is sore swollen and hurts and I cant tell if that means its leaking or something. He has already removed it so im assuming if it was leaking out i would see it on the bandage but dont know if it could be leaking inside.

I cant tell if im dehydrated.. a few times i have gotten really hot but its gone away... my hand/arm is still swollen where the IV was hooked up... and im paranoid about getting enough walking to make sure I dont get blood clots. I cant get comfortable enough to sleep in the recliner for more than an hour at a time.. and when I do sleep I wake up with a headache because its not comfortable on my neck. Even when I do sleep I am worried that I need to wake up frequently TO FREAKIN SIP. I am sick of bubbles, and pain that i dont even know is gas pain or not... but my stomach is hurting and i feel like i always need to be by a bathroom incase its not just "gas".

I am just hating this........ I am mad at myself that I could not have enough motivation to just work out and eat right and now I am in pain and miserable I know that today is only the 4th day after surgery but I am feeling like the wound should not be hurting this much.

I am so sorry for the venting.. really I am.. I am just having a hard time

[swizzly 901]

Just remind yourself that the pain and sadness is VERY temporary -- you'll be perky and up and about in no time. Really! Good luck to you.

[chilo1 62]

I'm sorry you're feeling this way now Tamz, I think we all go through some sort of, "could I not have done this myself?" feeling, but it will pass, you'll start losing weight and feeling better in no time!

[Rootman 1,101]

Just a WAG but I would guess that only one patient in 100 comes away feeling fine all throughout the recovery and first few months - for the rest of the 99 of use shmoes we wonder WTF did I do to myself? I was afraid I was going to die for a while, then after I didn't I was afraid I wasn't going too.

It's completely natural and as Chilo stated, you'll start to lose weight and feel better.

[susnl 17]

I thought I was totally prepared. The sipping once I got home brought out the WTH feelings. I think day 4 was pretty bad for me too. I ended up putting my fluids with a couple of ice cubes in my toddlers insulated sippy cup w/o the spill proof valve in. Every hour I started with 6 one oz medicine cups. I would fill one up and drink it, then repeat through the hour until all six were finished. Then repeat. My incentive for getting through them quicker - a break from sipping!!!

Then amazingly - Day 5 happens. It seemed to get drastically better on day 5. I was able to get through the six cups in 30 minutes instead of the hour. Then by Glorious Day 8, I was drinking much easier and moved to a big girl cup.

Good Luck!! It really does get better quickly. There are some bumps right down the road like stalls but the sleeve is so worth it.

[To Be Thin 2011 80]

Awwww... I feel so bad for you Tamz....

I know is sounds stupid and probably not what you want to hear, but it does truly get better...it does..... Hang in there, and stay on this formun, it does help to vent & share your feelings...

[ybnormal 21]

Just hang on for a few days Tamz. I also left you a pm with my number in it. Call me anytime!

I feel wonderful now! By the end of week 1 I was coming around to thinking "ok, I think I'll live..." Week two was a LOT better but still hard to get all my liquids in but I was excited because I could move into the full liquids stage and the pain had drastically decreased and now, day 19 (this is the exciting part!) I've lost 28 pounds and I KNOW it was all worth it! Give yourself time to rest and heal and you'll look back on this as just a blip in time and a minor bump in the road and oh so worth it!

*hugs!*

Renee`

[thinoneday 445]

So my sleeve was Thursday, yesterday (Sunday) was my first day home .. and I am feeling regretful about my decision to do this I hate that i feel that way but I do. This is hard I have cried several times since I have been home for not even 24 hrs yet. Its not even the fact that im hungry or want food.. because I really dont have the hunger for it at all. But i am sick of sipping, and not knowing if im sipping enough ... If I put my water/juice/crystal light in a big cup to keep it next to me while im resting.. then I cannot gage how much im drinking. Yet, if I pour it in the 2oz cups.. I have to get up every 1/2 hour and it hurts the wound from where my dr had the leaking tube in It is sore swollen and hurts and I cant tell if that means its leaking or something. He has already removed it so im assuming if it was leaking out i would see it on the bandage but dont know if it could be leaking inside.

I cant tell if im dehydrated.. a few times i have gotten really hot but its gone away... my hand/arm is still swollen where the IV was hooked up... and im paranoid about getting enough walking to make sure I dont get blood clots. I cant get comfortable enough to sleep in the recliner for more than an hour at a time.. and when I do sleep I wake up with a headache because its not comfortable on my neck. Even when I do sleep I am worried that I need to wake up frequently TO FREAKIN SIP. I am sick of bubbles, and pain that i dont even know is gas pain or not... but my stomach is hurting and i feel like i always need to be by a bathroom incase its not just "gas".

I am just hating this........ I am mad at myself that I could not have enough motivation to just work out and eat right and now I am in pain and miserable I know that today is only the 4th day after surgery but I am feeling like the wound should not be hurting this much.

I am so sorry for the venting.. really I am.. I am just having a hard time

I think a few of us have gone through this phase. . . it's hard, it's not easy. . . I hated my sleeve for a very long time. . . I'm out now 17 months and there are days I really regret it, but you know I think I would hate being morbidly obese instead, so I take the good with the bad. . . you'll be ok, your going to eventually get used to this and you'll be fine. . . i'm sorry this is happening but I can totally relate. . . no matter how prepared you really think you were, you really are not. . . good luck and PM me if you need to talk further. . .

[S311kyra 1]

I think that everyone else has said it, but I'm going to say it again. It does get better. Day 4 after surgery was hell for me and it also happened to be my birthday. I cried the entire day. For me, day 8 or so was really when it started to get a little easier and now I'm 4 weeks out and it's so much better. You made a drastic change to your body, but you will be sooooo thankful for it very soon. This forum has been a life saver for me. Just take some time and read through the posts. You'll see how normal you're feeling now and the great things that you have to look forward to. ::hugs::

[kellyw74 258]

You are totally normal to feel the way you do! But I promise you by day 5, you will feel like a new person and wonder why you ever had buyer's regret! It is like a huge turning point and you will feel so much better I promise!!

And every day after that you will get better and better! Just hang in there and sip,sip,sip!!

Hugs,

Kelly

[Always singing 0]

Hi Tamz,

Thank you so much for your post. I am one week out today and I have felt as though I should be able to do more, feel better, and not be in any more pain. Well I realized that I am not giving myself credit for the things that are better. I read so many posts where others come home with no pain, are able to do things and have little to no problems. I also have someone very close to me who went through a bypass several years ago and he did not even have to take the pain meds after the first day he was home and was able to sip fine. I remember telling the doctor the first time he came to see me in the hospital and I told him I was in a lot of pain and he was surprised saying, "really most patient's are not in that much pain." I have felt disappointed in myself at times thinking that I am a wimp and I should be doing better. So, what I do is try to remember that everyone is different and no one is going to experience it the same. I was so happy that last night was the first night I slept through the night without meds and still did not take them until I absolutely needed it around 11am. I also was happy when I tried Crystal Light fruit punch this morning and i loved it and was able to take bigger drinks. I am also happy that I was able to take a walk outside that was longer than I had before. So all this to say I am trying to look at the positives and not the negative. I do see everyday as getting better and not setting expectations so high. The one thing that makes me not regret my choice is when I stepped on the scale this morning and I saw that within the first week I had lost 11 lbs. I think that is pretty fantastic. So I guess we need to take the bad and the ugly to be able to reach our ultimate goal of health I am praying that you will be able to focus more on the positive and less on the negative and that you soon are able to see change. Keep us posted and please feel free to vent anytime.

[cadams5 0]

Thanks so much for posting about your feelings, and for everyone who has responded. I really needed to hear this today. My surgery was on Wed. June 8. Yesterday, Sunday, was really lousy. I missed eating; I wanted to taste something and feel something in my mouth. Then I started having diarrhea, and that progressed to that point it was explosive & I was not even making it to the bathroom and I ran out of underwear and the dog was in my way and I just felt like screaming and crying and throwing a fit!!!! I felt like a huge failure. I finally was able to get my meds. down (I hate splitting them into quarters, takes forever to get them down) and at 8:00 I'd had enough and went to bed.

Today I still feel emotional and weepy. But the diarrhea is gone, thank God. Stomach is still a little rumbly. I think I am a little dehydrated, as i feel weak and can't concentrate on anything. So I"m trying to keep the Water & crystal light going; had a Protein drink and I felt a little better after that too. I have my post-op check up tomorrow morning. I know I will make it through. But I'm so relieved to hear that I"m not the only one thinking "what in the world have I done????"

Thanks!

[feedyoureye 3,087]

I got a sippy cup and a jogging cup and used a measuring cup to fill them up the first time so I knew how much they held. I figured 3 1/2 sippy cups would do it for the day, minimum. I kept a piece of paper next to the couch, and ticked off every cup I drank. I only had to do this for a couple of weeks, now I just eyeball it.

[re7777 1]

I also used a sippy cup. The cups have these little faces on them and I measured out how much 4 oz was in the cup (went up to the hippo's teeth). I just kept track of it that way. Plus, your Protein liquids count toward the 64 oz of Water. My nut said to aim for it, but if I couldn't, the next day would be better.

When I got home, the easiest thing to get down was chicken broth. Something about the warmth helped a lot. I had my mom go and buy me a thermos at CVS and I poured in 1 cup of broth, screwed on the top, and then poured little bits in the cup so it was always warm when I drank it. When I was done, I knew I had drank 8 oz. Just little tricks.

I'm 3 weeks out tomorrow and I just started with Water bottles. Those sippy cups really were great!

Good luck. I hope that you feel better.

robin