My reasons for doing this

[Nancy Rivers 24]

I have always been happy with myself. It has never really mattered to me what others have thought of me - because only I can control how I feel. If others don't like me because I'm heavy - well that's their loss. So in that regard, I'm probably not your typical morbidly obese person.

I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes in 2003. My A1C was just over 7 - so not too awful. In the years following, it had remained in the low 7's. In the last year it has leaped up to the high 7's. My doc still says that I don't need an endocrinologist - I just need to loose weight. But he has no suggestions on how to do that. So, I research and try different diets just to have my weight increase to the highest I have ever been. Yup, that worked... NOT. But still, that wasn't the tipping point for me.

In 2005, my back started bothering me. My doc has me do physical therapy and it helped. Then 2 years later, it acted up again - this time the pain went down my right leg and I woke up one day and was not able to get out of bed. I had to use the restroom of course, but it took me 2 hours to get out of bed so that I could walk to the bathroom - just 10 steps away from my bed! At this point the MRI showed I had a bulging disc and they did surgery to fix it. Now, 4 years later, I am finally able to stand straight, but can't stand for more than 5 minutes without breaking out in a sweat. I also can't walk more than 10 minutes without having issues. My health has really gone downhill since that surgery and I regret having it. My left leg is getting the same pain that my right leg had, but I will deal with that pain for as long as possible before having that surgery again. I know that loosing weight will help my back (at least that's what every doctor says), but again, that's not the tipping point for me.

In 2008, I was diagnosed with sleep apnea and given a CPAP. I tried it for a year, trying different masks and machines, but felt that it was actually making my sleep worse and not better (I was more tired after using it), so I stopped using the CPAP. But this was not a tipping point for me.

In the last year, I have had to get new clothes - size 28w. I have never in my life had to wear clothes that big. That was depressing - but still not the tipping point for me.

My new avatar was a picture taken at Christmas last year. I was helping out at a Christmas program, and decided that I would dress as an elf since there was already a Santa. I found the largest elf costume that I could find - and it barely fit. The tights weren't even close to fitting, but luckily, I had a pair of dark green pants that worked well with the costume top. The gentleman who played Santa used a pillow to make him "fat" like Santa is supposed to be. But, as you can see from the picture, his elf was larger than he was! That was depressing! But again, it's not the tipping point for me.

Over the past year or so, I've noticed I have had more issues getting myself "clean" after #2. It's been harder and harder to wipe everything. It just occurred to me that it's probably because I'm bigger and thus can't reach as well now. So, yeah, this is a definite factor in my decision - but still not the tipping point for me. (Sorry for the TMI.)

So with all of that said, what really is the tipping point for me? It's the fact that although I have insomnia big time, I could fall asleep easily during the day and I am so lethargic that I don't do activities that I used to. It's getting worse too. I've seen my parents do this, and some friends and I hate that they do this. I have realized I am becoming like them and I really do not want that to happen.

So how crazy is it that the reason I finally decided to do this is because I am literally tired of being so tired?

[Eureka-C 20]

I don't think it's crazy at all. The tipping point for me was getting on a ride at six flags and they couldn't lock it down. I had to get off. Depressing.

[So Cal Kurt 32]

You are doing it for exactly the right reasons. Improving and even rstoring your health is the best reason. I know first hand how hard diabetes is to control. It used to consume my life worrying about it and controlling it. BTW, the # 2 thing is probably from metformin if you are taking that. A common side effect. I don't miss that at all. Good luck on your Journey!

[AKMama 36]

I know exactlly what you mean. Over the past 6 -7 months I have had a harder and harder time staying awake. It has finally gotton so bad that I cannot go to town (which is 110 miles away)anymore by myself because I will catch myself dozing off. I can't watch t.v. because I am sitting there the whole time with my head bobbing not able to stay awake. I hate it.

I hope that whenever I eventually have the surgery it will help.

Lara

[Nancy Rivers 24]

You are doing it for exactly the right reasons. Improving and even rstoring your health is the best reason. I know first hand how hard diabetes is to control. It used to consume my life worrying about it and controlling it. BTW, the # 2 thing is probably from metformin if you are taking that. A common side effect. I don't miss that at all. Good luck on your Journey!

I was taking metformin - but never had an issue with that. My doc switched me to byetta and took me off metformin in an effort to get me to lose weight and control the sugar. It's not working either....

Thanks for your comments. I appreciate it.

[ybnormal 21]

It's one of the best reasons! I'm doing it for medical reasons as well, not to look better but to feel better and live longer and hopefully *crossing fingers tightly* make myself well.

Good luck!

Renee`

[meggiep 57]

It took a lot to tip you!

It was bad pain that keeps me almost bedridden that did it for me. I have accepted a quality of life that is WRONG for my age.

When I first met with my surgeon he said he could see me in a wheelchair followed by an early death. Whoah there! Not me!

I could not get this surgery soon enough. And I still feel that way , even though today I feel like crap, can;t get Protein down, ad am a poor pitiful me!

It will be great ot have you amongst us!

[Penpen 28]

Sounds like many good reasons to me! As for me, I have a few health problems but nothing serious yet. But my emotional health has been horrible. And I think your emotional health is just as important as your physical health. I've lost 50, 60, 70 lbs. at different times in my life. It would take forever and always be a painful journey watching everyone around me eat and drink whatever they wanted and never exercise but still be thin. The last couple of years I thought I was going through a mid-life crisis....that's if women go through them...I don't know. I wanted to lose the weight but was so depressed about doing it. I didn't want to go through it again. Lose and then gain back what you lost plus an extra 20-40 lbs. on top of that. I WAS DONE!!! My husband has always said, "you know how to lose weight, you've done it before and you felt great." I told him about a month ago, that I wasn't going to try anymore ... that it was a battle that I would never win. That's when he suggested having this surgery or the bypass done. I was in total shock because a little over a year ago, I was approved to do the lap band and he said absolutely not....and I just kind of started going down hill from there. He's very supportive but just didn't feel like the lap band was a safe option (and I'm thankful he felt that way...I think I would have regretted it.) plus a man he worked with had it done and never lost a pound. I thought my husband was completely against any kind of surgery. He's even tried to diet with me....we would both fail at it! So, I'm not really sure what made him decide he was okay with this but I'm so thankful!