Ready to start a new life

Ready4aNewLife · May 11, 2011

Hello everyone! I'm new here. This website is a really great place to find out everything I need to know about the vertical sleeve. I was first interested in the lapband just because it seemed a lot safer. But now that I have spent hundreds of hours reading all about WLS I have decided that Vertical Sleeve is by far the best choice for me. I went to a seminar only to find out that they didnt take medicaid. I finally found a place that does and my orientation is set for May 16. I am so excited to finally be working my way to actually being able to live my life. I am a 19 year old female college student. I am 287 lbs. I have been overweight literally my entire life. Even when I was in kindergarten I was a lot heavier than the other children in my class. I am very embarrased of how I look and I feel disgusted of myself everytime I look in the mirror. I am so depressed right now. I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea yesterday..so this doesnt help at all. Hopefully starting my CPAP machine will help me feel a little better. I remember being in 5th grade...that's 9 years old and being on the Atkins diet. The other kids would ask me why I wasnt eating bread and I was embarrased so I told everyone that I was allergic to bread. I yo-yoed dieted literally my entire childhood and am currently still trying to lose weight. I am just so sick of being unhealthy like this. All of my friends are skinny and I hate walking on the treadmill next to leave sweating my butt off while they are next to me running and not even dropping a sweat. It just makes me want to quit. But I know that I cant. I want to walk into a room for once in my life and people to look at me and think how pretty I look or how skinny I am. I just hope that my insurance will cover it since I am a college student and cant afford much right now. I have BCBS and medicaid so Im hoping that BCBS will cover most of it and my medicaid will cover the rest and my deductible and copay. SInce I am under 21, I don't have to pay any copays or deductibles, my medicaid covers that for me. I am so excited to get a chance to start a completely new life! I mean I am so ashamed of myself and the way I look that I dont even talk to people anymore...just walk and stare at the ground. I'm afraid of seeing the dirty looks on peoples facing when they look at me and just thinking that they are thinking how gross and fat I am. I don't want that for the rest of my life =( I have lived this way for 19 years...and I'm only 19 years old. I can't wait for this opportunity and I pray that I get accepted by my insurance companies.

Roudoudou · May 11, 2011

Welcome! We're glad you're here.

Ann

Penpen · May 11, 2011

Welcome Hanna!! I'm new too! Your feelings about yourself, sound far to familiar. My story is a little different but I know how you are feeling. I disgust myself and I try to hide from the world!!

I just had my first appointment with my surgeon today and it went well. I'm excited to know that I or all of us, have the chance to be healthier and prettier. That we can stop hiding from the world!

Ready4aNewLife · May 11, 2011

Welcome Hanna!! I'm new too! Your feelings about yourself, sound far to familiar. My story is a little different but I know how you are feeling. I disgust myself and I try to hide from the world!!

I just had my first appointment with my surgeon today and it went well. I'm excited to know that I or all of us, have the chance to be healthier and prettier. That we can stop hiding from the world!

I can't wait to be prettier and healthier =) And I especially can't wait to stop hiding from the world!!! I can't wait to have my first appointment with my surgeon!

Penpen · May 11, 2011

Yes, I can't wait either!! I think emotional health is just as important as physical. I think that it's terrible that we are judged based on our weight alone. I have had lots of people tell me it's what's on the inside that counts but that's really not how a lot of people feel...I've been treated differently, looked at differently, and even had family members make jokes about my weight to my face. I'm 37 and wish that the sleeve had been available yrs ago. I decided a few months ago that I wasn't even going to try anymore. So many times I've lost weight ... So many times, I've gained all back plus some! I was done!!! Then my hubby mentioned that a lady at his work had the bypass done and had lost over 100 lbs. That maybe we should look into it. Of course, I'm not interested in the bypass but the sleeve, yes. So here I am...making friends with people I have so much incommon with. There's not many that I know that I can freely talk about this with. My wonderful sister-in-law completely understands so she's a source of encouragement for me. My hubby too. But it's awesome to come into this forum w people that have had the surgery or are in the beginnings of their journey.

I can't wait to be prettier and healthier =) And I especially can't wait to stop hiding from the world!!! I can't wait to have my first appointment with my surgeon!

Amber · May 11, 2011

I hope everything goes smoothly and quickly! I went to a seminar at the end of February and now my surgery is in two weeks. I have BCBS Anthem and was approved. I'm 18. Good luck!

Ready4aNewLife · May 13, 2011

I hope everything goes smoothly and quickly! I went to a seminar at the end of February and now my surgery is in two weeks. I have BCBS Anthem and was approved. I'm 18. Good luck!

Did you have any comorbidities?