Thinking of Cancelling

[b190c550 1]

I have mostly been reading on this site for the past year but have not said much. I am scheduled to have VSG surgery next Thursday May, 5th. I was suppose to have it late last August but cancelled due to the fact that this scares the crap out of me! Thinking of cancelling again but if I do then thats it, I wont try a 3rd time. I have a job where my health is required and if type II diabetes arrives it will be all over. Already have high BP and diabetes is probably next. Im scared to death of possible complications there by also causing job problems and even more scared of life afterwards i.e. not being normal anymore cuz i cant eat anything. I already know im an idiot. Any other advice?

[Virginia S 13]

I have mostly been reading on this site for the past year but have not said much. I am scheduled to have VSG surgery next Thursday May, 5th. I was suppose to have it late last August but cancelled due to the fact that this scares the crap out of me! Thinking of cancelling again but if I do then thats it, I wont try a 3rd time. I have a job where my health is required and if type II diabetes arrives it will be all over. Already have high BP and diabetes is probably next. Im scared to death of possible complications there by also causing job problems and even more scared of life afterwards i.e. not being normal anymore cuz i cant eat anything. I already know im an idiot. Any other advice?

It's your decision, but a couple of things to remember: Most of us are scared. And more scared the closer it gets. The first short period post-surgery isn't fun, and I was terrified of leaks. I actually cried and cried to my husband a couple of nights before. So know that being scared is OK - don't beat yourself up over it.

So here are some questions to consider: are you scared of getting diabetes? Folks who get diabetes have instantly a 35% reduced lifespan from date of diagnosis. Many lose their sight, some lose limbs, some have to inject themselves every day - talk about dangerous complications, and those in later life diabetics are much more common than surgical complications with the sleeve. And that's just one way obesity can hurt you. So there's as much to be scared about NOT having the surgery as having it.

Second, you will be able to eat more normally than you think once you get through the post-op dietary restrictions. Example: we stopped at Burger King last night so hubby and daughter could grab a quick meal. I'm still on liquids so I drank a shake, but I looked at the menu - I could have had a grilled chicken sandwich and eaten the meat. At Wendy's they have half size salads with a great portion of chicken, or a small Wendy's chili is a perfect meal even when you just get on soft foods. Almost any restaurant has something you can have, if you modify it slightly (Arby's chicken salad wrap: open wrap, eat chicken salad...I could go on and on).

Try to think of how normal you'll feel without the weight and how easy it will be to modify foods to suit you once you're on normal foods. You can do this!

[kellyw74 258]

I am scared too! I am due to have my sleeve on the 9th. I pray and pray that everything goes right. If I do get a leak, it can be fixed and I know that!

I have diabetes and high blood pressure. That was the biggest motivator for me to get this surgery. I didn't want to end up like my great grandmother and lose my leg from diabetes or my great aunt and be blind. Better yet, I do not want my AWESOME husband to have to take care of me later in life or die prematurley.

I am not doing this to look good, although that is a great bonus!! I want to be healthy. I know that if I follow the rules, I will be!!

You do what you think is best for you, but I know why I am doing it and totally trust that my dr. and the hospital have prepared me to be successful and not have complications.

Best of luck to you in whatever you choose!

Kelly

[Hawaii50 4]

Only you know whats best for you, however I will say you are being irrational in some of your reasons. (sorry, not be rude) The main one that pops out is the eating thing. Yes, for awhile (4-6 weeks) you will be in a liquid/mushie diet while your healing. I am in week 5 and ate egg and sausage for Breakfast, plan to have some meatloaf for dinner, throw in some pudding, or beef jerkey (actually Ostrich jerkey....much softer and loads of protein)

I am a super hard worker (manual labor and dedicated)...so I am on light duty-no lifting over 30lbs until the 3 month mark...where I'll also be cleared to continue playing soccer, softball, surfing etc. The rate I was headed, there is no way I could have kept up my lifestyle into my mid-thirties much less the rest of my life! I am also a really social person hosting a couple of dinners/week, going to bbq's, out to dinner and I will tell you the way I eat now, is a hell of lot more "normal" than what I used to eat...yikes, so many calories, carbs...no wonder I was so fat! I never thought I was one to pack half my dinner away...what, not clean my plate? None of my friends even notice the way I eat....I am the same person as before so they are paying attention to what I say...not what I put in my mouth.

It is normal to feel scared and anxious before surgery, I would be worried if you didn't feel a little of that. Assuming you've poured over the details of your surgeon and the forums here, you have to trust you are in the hands of professionals and they will take the best care of you! For myself....the risks of being morbidly obese for the rest of my life and all the co-mo's that go with it, far outweighed the risks from surgery. You can read posts here on a few that have indeed experienced complications and as far as I can tell, none of them regretted their decision to get surgery. They also don't blame the surgeon, the aftercare or their negligence.

The one thing that I think all of us post-op sleevers regret...is not having it done sooner! You're doing the right thing by reaching out, at some point you will have to TRUST yourself, TRUST your surgeon and TRUST your friends and family that they will love and support you! Good luck, you'll make the right decision for you.

xx

Heidi

[kellyw74 258]

well said Heidi!

Kelly

[Disney 20]

You're not an idiot. It is perfectly normal to be scared. I think we all were to some degree. Just remember back to all the reading you have done on this site and the overwhelming majority are MORE than happy with this decision and I think you will be, too. Hopefully diabetes will never even come into play and your BP will normalize (mine did right after surgery).

Good luck to you and please don't be so hard on yourself. This is a BIG decision.

[AutumnLily 77]

I have mostly been reading on this site for the past year but have not said much. I am scheduled to have VSG surgery next Thursday May, 5th. I was suppose to have it late last August but cancelled due to the fact that this scares the crap out of me! Thinking of cancelling again but if I do then thats it, I wont try a 3rd time. I have a job where my health is required and if type II diabetes arrives it will be all over. Already have high BP and diabetes is probably next. Im scared to death of possible complications there by also causing job problems and even more scared of life afterwards i.e. not being normal anymore cuz i cant eat anything. I already know im an idiot. Any other advice?

Everyone of us had a fear of death, leaks or some other complication that could occur. But if you live your life fearful of things you will never live your life to the fullest.

You should make a pros and cons list for surgery and for not having surgery. Hopefully you will be albe to settle your fears and decide if this is truly the right decision for you.

Make a decision based on fact and not fear and you will never regret the decision that you make. Keep us posted on your journey which ever direction you choose.

[b190c550 1]

Thank you to all for your great advice. I will try to put fears aside and use my better judgement. Thanks again!

[heygale 0]

Hang in there, be brave. You can do it. I won't say that the first few months are easy as you learn to eat/drink again. But how much I wish I could have done this 20 years ago! I had my sleeve 13 mths ago. I have lost 90 lbs, wearing a size 6. I am a 'normal' size for the first time in my life! I FEEL GREAT! Yes, everyone says I look great, but the important part is that I FEEL 30 years younger. I can eat just about anything I want to eat, just not very much - a bite or two and you are really satisfied. It is the most wonderful freeing feeling... Occasionally I wish I could eat more of something that tastes really good, but 30 minutes later I am so glad I didn't ... Like when I zip up my size 6 jeans, or when my DH wraps his arms All the way around me, or when I curl up on the couch in a tiny ball. I had forgotten what it is like to cross my legs!

I just took my grandchildren to Disneyland and kept up with them for 16 hours! I rode every roller coaster and ride there and loved every moment. A year ago, I would not have considered even trying to walk 16 hours... Trust me, in 3-4 months, you will feel so grateful for the opportunity that you have to completely change your life.

Be grateful, be brave, GO FOR IT!

Thank you to all for your great advice. I will try to put fears aside and use my better judgement. Thanks again!

[massindex 346]

You won't regret it. Once you start down this path, it's life changing!

Thank you to all for your great advice. I will try to put fears aside and use my better judgement. Thanks again!

[Margaret 4]

I wouldn't cancel if I were you. I'm just 3 weeks out and am having no trouble with eating soft, good food. My bp meds are almost a thing of the past. I was sick for ONE day after surgery and that was it. My surgeon told me 3 WEEKS until heavy lifting and that's today. I cleaned up all day yesterday after our terrible storms of the week. I can lift and haul whatever I want with no problems. I don't regret my decision one single minute of the day! Go for it!

Thank you to all for your great advice. I will try to put fears aside and use my better judgement. Thanks again!

[massindex 346]

I should add that my job requires me to be on the road. I was back on the road 1 week after surgery, lugging my suitcase and 30 lb computer bagpack around the country. Just got off the road this week after 11 straight weeks, home just weekends. I loved the challenge!

You have to exercise care but you'll be surprised how resilient your body can be....

I have mostly been reading on this site for the past year but have not said much. I am scheduled to have VSG surgery next Thursday May, 5th. I was suppose to have it late last August but cancelled due to the fact that this scares the crap out of me! Thinking of cancelling again but if I do then thats it, I wont try a 3rd time. I have a job where my health is required and if type II diabetes arrives it will be all over. Already have high BP and diabetes is probably next. Im scared to death of possible complications there by also causing job problems and even more scared of life afterwards i.e. not being normal anymore cuz i cant eat anything. I already know im an idiot. Any other advice?

[feedyoureye 3,087]

I love my sleeve, and I still enjoy food. You do have to do some things differently, but you still eat, and you look and feel a heck of a lot better doing it!

[janinemaire 7]

Everyone has made great points but only you can decide. I was ready to cancel when I had my surgery even as they were rolling me in the operating room. I am so glad I just said f__ it and let the nurses and doctors take over. Try to keep busy till next week, you can do this. Don't let fear of the unknown stop you from doing what you want to do, I would do it again in a heartbeat. If you really feel you wil cancel call you doctors office and talk with someone who can help you deal with your anxiety. Good luck!

[iegal 460]

I think you have already talked yourself out of helping yourself. Sorry if I am blunt - but even you admit your CAREER IS OVER if you do not make changes. Have you made those changes from August (your first surgery date) to now? If yes, then you would not have scheduled 2nd surgery date. I was sleeved because I failed over and over and over at so many diets and Weight Loss programs.

Being scared is okay, it is healthy to worry, but it is not healthy to have your fears paralyze you from making rational choices.

You need to realize that you are important. Your health is important.

You are not "normal" now, are you? Do you eat normal size portions or is it all genetics that made you severly overweight? I still enjoy food. At goal, I can eat almost anything, just in drastically reduced portions to my "presleeve" self.

Your options. Say no and get diabeties and high BP and lose your job. OR Step out and take a minor risk (all surgeries have risk) and as long as you have chosen a good surgeon, I say Yes.

Make the choice to save yourself from you. But this is not my choice, it is yours. What ever your choice I wish the best for you! I have no regrets.