Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

How did you tell friends & family about having WLS?



Recommended Posts

My fiance and sister are the only ones who know that I am starting the process to get sleeved. I won't feel comfortable telling anyone else until I get insurance approval. I am actually a pretty private person and have been debating whether or not to tell co-workers and extended family members should I get a green light. At some point it becomes obvious that someone has had WLS. What do you guys think? How did you go about telling friends, family and co-workers? What part of the process did you do it? Did any of you choose not to tell those around you?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it is a very personal decision to tell or not!

I am telling nobody, except my husband. My own mother doesn't even know! However, I may tell her later!

People are so judgemental and ignorant when it comes to WLS and it really pisses me off. I just don't want to hear the negative comments about it!

I have lost almost 60lbs pre-op, so I don't think many will suspect too much. I am having hernia repair too and that is what my work thinks I am having done.

I will just continue with my weight loss as I have and I don't think many will suspect too much. If they do, it is really none of their business!

Good luck to you!

Kelly ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it is a very personal decision to tell or not!

I am telling nobody, except my husband. My own mother doesn't even know! However, I may tell her later!

People are so judgemental and ignorant when it comes to WLS and it really pisses me off. I just don't want to hear the negative comments about it!

I have lost almost 60lbs pre-op, so I don't think many will suspect too much. I am having hernia repair too and that is what my work thinks I am having done.

I will just continue with my weight loss as I have and I don't think many will suspect too much. If they do, it is really none of their business!

Good luck to you!

Kelly ;)

Thanks Kelly for sharing that. I have been considering doing the same. One of my co-workers was sleeved and I have heard so many things said about it behind her back. She was completely open about it from the moment she knew it was going to happen.

Good luck to you as well!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Only people that know about my WLS are my bf, mother, sister and a close co-worker/friend. No one else knows, nor needs to know. About a two months ago I did mention at work that I was going on a hardcore diet (healthier foods, Protein shakes etc.) and have lost some weight, so they won't suspect so much.

Not quite sure if I will let people know eventually; but if i do, it won't be for a while

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told no one pre surgery and after surgery I only told my immediate family. I do not want the negative ignorant comments from people. I had a friend who has WLS a little while back and the rude comments that were said behind her back (never to her face) just boiled my blood. So they can speculate but several months before surgery I started cutting out carbs, increasing my Protein and talking about exercising. They can attribute all this hard work I am doing without knowing I have one extra very helpful tool. That I am so glad I got it!

Everyone is different and so to each their own as to the reasons for telling or not. Hope you find the best choice for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I understand not wanting to tell. Before surgery, lots of people were very judgemental when I told them. Now that I am losing the weight so quickly, they all have all been pretty positive about it. Just so you know, you will get TONS of questions about how you are losing the weight along with compliments. It can be overwhelming at times. I decided to tell and I explain it by saying I had a fairly new procedure where they made my stomach smaller. If you have any concerns, wait until after surgery to tell when you feel more comfortable. Before surgery, I was so worried about what people thought. Now, I really don't care anymore. I am just so happy the sleeve is working and I feel so great! Good luck with everything!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told my husband first, then my parents. I also told my co-worker that shares a classroom with me. I built up the courage to tell my trainer. Then I waited a few weeks and emailed all my other local family. I still haven't told my family out of town. I have had some negative responses, but it's been empowering telling those people why it was the best decision for me. I teach high school and all my students know I went out "for surgery" and know it was outpatient (because I didn't want to scare them). I don't know if I'll be going into much more detail than that. I'm a pretty transparent person, so if someone asks, I'll tell them. The day before my surgery I started a YouTube channel to document my progress and I decided to post it on my Facebook. I have had the most wonderful notes of love and encouragement. All in all - very positive experience so far! It's nothing to be ashamed of, but it's also very personal and you need to do what will be best for your happiness.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I only told my husband of course, my kids and one good friend. I did not want any negative comments from people who know nothing about it. I would have liked to have told my mom and one brother but did not want my sister to know. So I decided not to tell them and then have them have to keep it a secret. If anyone asks, and many do, I tell them I changed how and what I eat. Small micro meals, lots of Protein and cut out sugar. All true.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Only my mother and my partner know :-) Just be prepared with an answer when people start asking you how you are losing the weight. I am honest - to a point. I am on a high protien, low carb diet. Of course, people give me crap about that too... ha ha ha

It's a personal choice and I may change my mind later when I have reached my goal. I woudn't hesitate to tell someone who also has weight problems because I would love to give them the information. But, otherwise, I keep it to myself.

Lara

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i told my friends one at a time...starting with my friends who already had WLS...i wanted their input, and confirmation that they had no regrets...my friends were ALL supportive. There were some who were apprehensive but supportive nonetheless.

My family was a little more difficult...my family who work in healthcare, were easier. The most difficult were my parents. My dad TOTALLY supported to me. My mom cried when I first told her....she tried to change my mind each step of the way.

I was sleeved on 4/11 and I guess after doing her own research and realizing that I wasn't going to budge, she finally started supporting me and actually stayed with me a few days after surgery.

My friends and family were and enormous support and still are. I couldn't imagine doing this alone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As for work, I only told my immediate circle, and the RN who is super cool. None of the docs know, or my supervisor etc...i am sure they will figure it out. But at this point I don't think it's their business.

it was hectic because I did it at the hospital where I work...but i was able to get in and out unseen biggrin.gif

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The decision was made with my husband. We told my parents and his mother first because they would be helping with our children. I also told his paternal grandparents. my co-workers new I was having a procedure but I didn't tell them what procedure until i returned. I chose not to tell a lot of people because of the negative comments about WLS being the "easy way out'...haha if ONLY THEY KNEW!!! Everyone knows now, and my husbands cousins and their partners have started the Atkins diet. I have heard the negative comments but this was the best decision for me and my family so I could care less about what anyone else is saying now that it is over. I just didn't want the stress before hand of having to deal with all that.

good luck to you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't had my surgery yet. But the right now the only ones who know are my mother, sister, hubby, mother n-law, sister n-law, and 2 close friends. I made them all promise to not say a word to anyone. I want to avoid negative comments and everybody telling me what I "need" to do or "ought" to do. Now after surgery, I may tell an aunt and if someone asks then I'll be honest. I am more of a private person, where as my hubby wants to tell. Hence how my momnlaw and sisnlaw know. LOL! But they are supportive and promise to not tell. So I am ok.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It is so ridiculous that VIRTUALLY everyone that tells others about their decision to have WLS, receives negative remarks. I understand the human nature of many to be negative, but why are people so self-absorbed that they do not want others to look and feel their best! It really upsets me when patients tell me these sorts of things!!!! :angry:

As for all others out there...do this and do not even worry about the opinions of others. I used to tell patients to be up-front about this to everybody...but I have come to the conclusion that I was WRONG. What ever brings peace of mind to my patients is the right choice.

Wheeew...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone for the input. It is really nice to be able to ask those who have been there. I told my Clinic Manager today since I have been requesting a lot of time off to go to all of the needed appts. She said she was happy for me but thinks I am too young. I told her that most of my patients that have had WLS all tell me they wish they would have done it sooner. You win some and you lose some, I guess.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • rinabobina

      I would like to know what questions you wish you had asked prior to your duodenal switch surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×