I fell off the wagon. Hard.

[Amanda131 214]

For the first time since surgery, I let the mindless, almost binge-like eater out of the box. I don't know why for certain that I lost the battle today, but I have some guesses. I am in Texas where educators and police officers are being laid off like crazy. Guess what hubs and I do for living? Yup, cop and educator. My husband took a 20% decrease in pay right after I had surgery because of this and I found out this past week that my job is being reorganized in a terrible way.

I knew going into surgery that I had some emotional issues to work out with food. I even kept appointments with a therapist. I also worked to lower my stress level during this adjustment time. So, the work issues starting immediately after leaving the hospital were unexpected and unwanted. I am still working to learn to handle my emotions without food.

Added to all this, I had to travel for work three days last week and sat in a hotel conference room with elaborate Desserts and working lunches where I couldn't bring my own foods. I thought I did pretty good while I was there and worked out everyday yet I was hit with a three pound gain when I got home. I've been losing so fabulously that the increase really sucker punched me. So, today, I think I let a defeatest attitude win. I ate more than I should have and a few things I never should have touched (Damn you Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs). Tallied up, I hit 1400 hundred calories. A high for me.

On one hand, I am freaking out a bit because I know I can eat more than most and I am terrified of doing this again and ruining all I have acheived. On the other hand, I ate relatively healthy stuff if you take the candy egg out of the equation so I feel I scored a small victory. I know what I should be doing, I just wanted to confess to a group that understands. Thanks for reading.

Amanda

[Lila21 36]

I think it's good to realize that our emotional issues with food don't just disappear. I think it's important to recognize when you slip, but not get so fixated on it that you bring yourself down further. I know for me, that when I feel like I've failed, I start to feel like I'm going to continue to fail, and a part of me says "screw it." So, recognizing that without beating yourself up is great!! You made a mistake, it's just a minor bump in the road!

[MovinForward 2]

I agree that its easy to make mistakes, I too struggle with the emotional eating.. I think the important thing here is that you pick yourself up and continue on... We are all humans and I know for me I make plenty of mistakes, but I have to take the good with the bad and keep moving forward the best I can... because this is lifestyle change.. its not easy, but like anything else... we gotta accept it brush it off and continue on...

[Becca 108]

I totally understand! I am a Texas friend and this budget crisis is so stressful. My husband and I are both teachers and we are hoping we still will have jobs next year. I had a bad day today with food as well. I usually do fine with snacking, but today for some reason I ate lots of little things that added up to a lot. I had a Reese's Peanut Butter egg and I haven't even really liked candy since my sleeve surgery. The only good to all of this is that I can start over tomorrow. I won't be around all of my family's great cooking to tempt me. Glad you shared this. It is nice to know we can be here for each other and that we understand like nobody else can. Hugs!

[iegal 460]

Hello Amanda;

Forgive yourself and make plans for next time you might be in a similar situation. We are creatures of habit. I still struggle 7+ months out and yes, I had a Peanut Butter egg today also. I might gain a pound (or two cause I had some jelly Beans to wash down the PB egg) but I will start fresh and follow nutritional guidelines more closley tomorrow. Your stress levels are high, so help yourself by plotting for success in all situations.

At my last check up I talked at length with my doc and NUT about my battles with food. Being sleeved does not give us a miracle weight loss without any issues. I am so proud you understand the battle is not won by being sleeved alone. Seeking professional advice means you are serious about your wellbeing mentally and physically. Being sleeved means you can lose weight if you choose to take the right steps. Again, forgive yourself and plan ahead next time your might face a similar situation since you are not strong enough to say NO just yet. or be smart enough to plan your food ahead.

Were you really hungry? Was it just the egg that caused the weight gain or what else occured? This is war honey and I know you can WIN.

[So Cal Kurt 32]

Tomorrow is another day, don't beat yourself up. It is funny how our old ally food still wants to be our support. It is really hard to unlearn old habits.

The Reece's PB eggs got me too. I was mad that my daughter left a bag on the counter last week. I know I ate more than a few. Just recognizing the pattern is the biggest thing. I came to a conclusion over Christmas that if it has chocolate and Peanut Butter, I am powerless over it. I just need to stay away from it. I gained 4 lbs in 5 weeks from the never empty tray of kiss Cookies. I think I grabbed 2 every time I passed it. January came, I got back on track, lost the 4 and 4 more by the end of February. I hit goal and am now 6 under goal (well I was until this weekend).

If we weren't powerless over food, none of us would be on this forum. Luckily for me, holidays are really the only time that there is junk food in the house. The good thing is that 30 minutes on the elliptical burns almost 400 calories, I usually do 40 minutes. One extra day at the gym eliminates 12 of those little Reece's eggs. Not so bad when you do the math.

[sychadelic 10]

I think Reese's was created by Satan to tempt us all, grrrr! I did great with the real food at my family's Easter dinner. I had a half deviled egg, a little ham, a little less turkey and 2 green Beans. Then a couple hours later, the kids brought out their Easter haul, and after 3 offers of a Reese's, I caved.

I'm trying to remember that it's about being good the majority of time. Nobody can do it 24/7. I still have to fight that demon that tells me to give up anytime I fail. It's nice to know you're not alone.

Here's to another day to do it better!

[Can'tweight 41]

For the first time since surgery, I let the mindless, almost binge-like eater out of the box. I don't know why for certain that I lost the battle today, but I have some guesses. I am in Texas where educators and police officers are being laid off like crazy. Guess what hubs and I do for living? Yup, cop and educator. My husband took a 20% decrease in pay right after I had surgery because of this and I found out this past week that my job is being reorganized in a terrible way.

I knew going into surgery that I had some emotional issues to work out with food. I even kept appointments with a therapist. I also worked to lower my stress level during this adjustment time. So, the work issues starting immediately after leaving the hospital were unexpected and unwanted. I am still working to learn to handle my emotions without food.< /p>

Added to all this, I had to travel for work three days last week and sat in a hotel conference room with elaborate desserts and working lunches where I couldn't bring my own foods. I thought I did pretty good while I was there and worked out everyday yet I was hit with a three pound gain when I got home. I've been losing so fabulously that the increase really sucker punched me. So, today, I think I let a defeatest attitude win. I ate more than I should have and a few things I never should have touched (Damn you Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs). Tallied up, I hit 1400 hundred calories. A high for me.

On one hand, I am freaking out a bit because I know I can eat more than most and I am terrified of doing this again and ruining all I have acheived. On the other hand, I ate relatively healthy stuff if you take the candy egg out of the equation so I feel I scored a small victory. I know what I should be doing, I just wanted to confess to a group that understands. Thanks for reading.

Amanda

Amanda, I feel your pain. I too had a bad day yesterday. Not with candy (not my weakness) but with pizza and Mexican food. I only ate the topping off the pizza, but had too much and my body said, "Too much," and you know what that means. I had too much fixings with my normal "chicken Fajatia meat"...sour cream, guacamole, chips, etc... Then we took my son to see "RIO" (great movie by the way), had a little of his popcorn and Reece's "Pieces."

This morning I am 220 and Friday I was 218...bummer!! I too can consume more than the average sleever here, which is totally frustrating in itself. Still having issues with eating slower and always measuring. I am also more hungry than most, it seems. It's still so hard for me to understand how we can gain ANY weight with increasing our calories, fat, carbs, etc...from the normal 600 to a 900-1000 mark. Strange!

Good luck today as you get refocused on the task at hand. It's a hard road to hoe...but we will reap the benefits if we can just stay strong.

It's so comforting to know we have a safe place to come to where there is no judging our mistakes, but encouragement and compassion. Thanks guys!

[mandems mom 3]

What you all have to remember is that anything in moderation is okay. Don't go into this thinking that you have to deprive yourself of any one thing or you will fail. The other thing to note is that you all ate simple carbs (i.e. white sugar stuff) and those can actually make you retain more Water. So you may not have actually gained fat from eating the candy, desserts, etc, but you did add water. Get back on the wagon today, drink extra water, and I'm sure you'll see that fall right off.

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,282]

Hi Amanda,

Kudos to you for realizing your mistakes. Especially for coming here and opening yourself up. I think this is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Admitting it.

If anyone is watching the television show Ruby, you will see something in her personality that is keeping her at her current state (and gaining massive right now). She is having a very hard time realizing she is sabotaging herself and is basically unable to admit it. She is not seeing herself as she's eating some of this and some of that, not doing her workouts and basically just doing whatever she wants. So now, she's gone from 303 (so close to the 2's!!!) and now back up to nearly 360 Lbs.

I really sympathize with her because I've been there before, much more than I'd have liked. It's really hard!! We are here because we have an unhealthy relationship with food. It calls to us, especially when we need that extra comfort. It calls to us when we really don't need it to. What makes us strong enough to ignore it? I don't know the answer to that. Sometimes I win the battle and sometimes I don't. I do know though that I'm much more inclined to be good when times are smooth and steady. When it's not you will find me making not the greatest of choices.

Here's the difference now though, I have a sleeve so it's not as easy to over do it. I actually have been able to keep my portions under control for years now thanks to having been banded prior to my sleeve. I know my full symptoms. However, neither of these surgeries are going to stop me from eating white carbs. In fact none will! The RnY may (not always even) stop you for awhile but the dumping does eventually go away or lessen. Anyway, knowing that I went through so much to get my life in order I do MOSTLY do good. I Celebrate all the happy times, and when I don't do so good I don't beat myself up. I just pull up my bootstraps and tell myself to "get with it!!". I didn't do this second surgery to see myself fail, no way. Just doing this surgery is being a success for having the guts to even under go it.

I know this post is drawing out so I'll close now. I just wanted you to know you are not alone in this at all. Now, pull up them bootstraps lady and make today a new day. Stay away from most carbs for a few days and you'll be back on track, no problem.

Hugs!!

[ranchersdaughter 9]

I hit my first day of MFP (Mushie food Phase) on, you guessed it, Easter Sunday.

I thought I was awesome! I only ate one deviled egg, 2 oz's of greek yogurt with a scoop of chocolate Protein powder (major YUM, btw! Like chocolate pudding only not as sweet!) A single 1 inch by 1 inch piece of lowfat cheese, and 3 stalks of baked asparagus, chewed till nothing was left, and of course, one Protein shake and almost all of my Water quota for the day. Go Christal! You rock!..........

Meanwhile, back at the ranch.......Blast you, you Peanut Butter eggs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I ate 2, and 1 bite size milky way bar. I can't believe my tummy didn't revolt, but it's just a warning to me that I must be one of those few that can eat whatever and however much with no pain or nausea. (GREAT......NOT!!!!!!!)

I don't feel like I failed. I DO feel like I learned a little more about my body, and today I'm flushing by sticking with mostly liquids.

If we continually berate ourselves for a slip of the tongue (hehe!) we will never have to confidence to overcome our mistakes! So stop being so hard on yourself and congratulate yourself for the POSITIVE things! Hey, you didn't eat the whole bag now did you? THAT'S the positive! Hey, it didn't reverse your sleeve or anything that you have obtained so far, now did it? THAT'S the positive!

Today is a new day. Ok, so we hit a stumbling block. Get up, brush off your knees, put a smile back on your face, have someone kiss your boo boo and lets go play tag!!!!!!!

TAG!!! You're it!

Christal

[ALOCO53 0]

I can totally relate! Hence, my visit back to this site. This weekend was tough, and I did not win the battle with the Easter candy. I was at a shower on Saturday, can't eat too much at one time, so I ate 3 TIMES!

I have been feeling very discouraged too, I only lost 45 lbs since my surgery in October, I am excerising a lot, 4 and 5 miles each morning with Leslie Sansone. I am still a long way from my goal, but I will get there. It has not been as easy as I thought.

[2bslimkim 11]

Different point of view....

Remember, a lot of the restuarant/hotel foods you must eat at while traveling, are also higher in sodium which will temp. increase your Water weight.

Everytime I travel I gain even when staying on my diet. The increased sodiums in restuarant foods (even when low cal) are often enough to put on a little Water weight. Three lbs is nothing if you get a grip on it.

Flying, and/or sitting in a car can also make us swell.

Drink lots of water this week and I bet you flush your system out. Most of all... Don't beat yourself up. We all need to take a break from the diet every now and then... otherwise it consumes us. Most of all we must learn to live with splurges. It's like buying a expensive purse, you buy the purse then figure out where you will save to justify the cost.

Occational indulging is the same. Once you've done it, it's now time to figure out ways to compensate... Example, extra day at the gym or a one day liquid diet (like pre-op).

I'm also in Texas and wish you all the best.

[SouthernSleever 228]

If I have one off day I gain weight, a pound or two. Mine was the day before Easter. We went to a pizza buffett. pizza is my biggest downfall. I had 5 pieces, including a desert piece and a glass of sweet tea. This was streched out over 2 hours while we were visiting a friend. Just goes to show that you CAN eat around your sleeve and we must work for it. I was back on it yesterday and today. Keep your chin up, everyone has slipups.

[Amanda131 214]

You guys seriously ROCK. I came in from work to find tons of support waiting for me with plenty of GREAT advice to boast! I so appreciate this site and each of you. By bedtime last night, I was at peace with what happened but I really want to disect when this happens to look for strategies and techniques to aviod it in the future- loved the ideas you all offered. And, because in my overweight past I hid binges, I want to fully admit to and take responsibilities for these moments. Thanks for being the outlet for that.

Ironically, I woke up this morning to a five pound weightloss. I'm guessing that like some of you suggested I finally dropped the sodium and Water weight. Whatever, I'll take it!

In a side note: Have any of you noticed that you know all there is to know on why people stall, gain, etc. and can dispense great advice but when it's you gaining the weight you forget all of that good information? Thanks again for reminding me!

Amanda