Sleeveme2011 0 Posted April 24, 2011 I am overweight. I have been overweight almost my entire life. I am so sick and tired of being called names and being told what I "need" to do. :angry:NEWSFLASH***** I know I am fat. I have mirrors in my home and I look in them every single day. I dont need you telling me something I already know. WELL today my aunt came over to my moms house. First thing she says "hey big mama". Pissed me off but I moved on from it and simply said hi. I started going to the gym about 3 weeks ago and changed some of my eating habits prior to that and have lost 19 lbs. My response from her " you have more to get off, keep on working on it". Pissed again! Just simply say good job on your weight loss or something encouraging. Its like every time she sees me she has to say something to say about my weight. "You are getting broad across your back, loose some weight" or "you are jiggly" always something. Those of you who think talking to her and telling her how i feel will help, it doesn't. The best part is...DRUMROLL!!!! She is fat herself. She pisses me off sometimes and it does not stop. I snapped on someone the other week and my hubby said I need to be like that all the time. LOL! if only it worked. Just needed to vent! Thanks everyone Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KellyL 173 Posted April 24, 2011 I can relate, and what's bad is, these will be the same ones who will complain about the way we choose to lose weight or that we don't eat the right foods or that we're losing too fast or too much. Cause you can't please some people no matter what you do!!!! So don't worry bout it cuz we all been there done that too. It's time to please ourselves!! Kelly Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sleeveme2011 0 Posted April 24, 2011 You are so right. You can't please everybody and I sure don't try. LOL! It is time to please ourselves. I had a cosmetic surgery in 2008 and when she found out (after the surgery) she went CRAZY! Why you do that and blaa blaa. I can only imagine what she will say after I have WLS and start loosing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mandems mom 3 Posted April 24, 2011 I am overweight. I have been overweight almost my entire life. I am so sick and tired of being called names and being told what I "need" to do. :angry:NEWSFLASH***** I know I am fat. I have mirrors in my home and I look in them every single day. I dont need you telling me something I already know. WELL today my aunt came over to my moms house. First thing she says "hey big mama". Pissed me off but I moved on from it and simply said hi. I started going to the gym about 3 weeks ago and changed some of my eating habits prior to that and have lost 19 lbs. My response from her " you have more to get off, keep on working on it". Pissed again! Just simply say good job on your weight loss or something encouraging. Its like every time she sees me she has to say something to say about my weight. "You are getting broad across your back, loose some weight" or "you are jiggly" always something. Those of you who think talking to her and telling her how i feel will help, it doesn't. The best part is...DRUMROLL!!!! She is fat herself. She pisses me off sometimes and it does not stop. I snapped on someone the other week and my hubby said I need to be like that all the time. LOL! if only it worked. Just needed to vent! Thanks everyone Since she's overweight as well, you may as well offer her the same kind of "help" she's offering you and point out her flaws. You know, like "Hey, I've noticed your butt is getting bigger." or "Wow, you're starting to get a triple chin"...then follow it up with, "maybe you should join a gym too"!! I don't act nice with people like that, even if they are family! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sleeveme2011 0 Posted April 24, 2011 LOL!@ Mandemsmom..... the funny part is she already joined a gym. How about for Christmas last year she gave me a gym pass, swimsuit and swimshoes so I could test out the gym. My sister and I laughed.... I will point out her flaws for sure the next time. Hopefully it will help. She is one of those people who thinks they know everything about everything. LOL! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mandems mom 3 Posted April 24, 2011 LOL!@ Mandemsmom..... the funny part is she already joined a gym. How about for Christmas last year she gave me a gym pass, swimsuit and swimshoes so I could test out the gym. My sister and I laughed.... I will point out her flaws for sure the next time. Hopefully it will help. She is one of those people who thinks they know everything about everything. LOL! I feel sorry for her. It's the whole bullying concept...she has to put you down to make herself feel better. Poor thing... Clearly the gym isn't working for her! I'm the type that gives back what I get and I don't care who it's from. We're all human beings so either you treat me with respect or you won't get it in return. You're owning your situation, taking charge, and doing something about it and should be really proud of yourself. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cmsumom 5 Posted April 30, 2011 Or something like- I thought you had a gym membership- why would you spend the money if you aren't going to use it- I know your butt wouldn't be getting that big if you were going. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Griselda 7 Posted April 30, 2011 I can relate, my grandmother did this to me constantly while I was growing up and made me feel like I was morbidly obese, (turns out I was a size 11 back then). I wish I had known then that I wasn't really that big, she wore a size 18 herself. It wasn't until after she died and i started looking at pictures of her when she was younger that I realized she was (in her dreadfully misguided way) trying to tell me to watch it and not end up like her, for some reason she thought this would work!! Looking at those old pictures I see we are built the same way and she must have recognized herself in my varying stages of weight gain through puberty, early adulthood. I don't know if this is the situation with your aunt, but I wish I had known not to let it bother me. All you can do for now is ignore her and watch her freak out when you start really losing!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
emily_0192010 168 Posted April 30, 2011 I am overweight. I have been overweight almost my entire life. I am so sick and tired of being called names and being told what I "need" to do. :angry:NEWSFLASH***** I know I am fat. I have mirrors in my home and I look in them every single day. I dont need you telling me something I already know. WELL today my aunt came over to my moms house. First thing she says "hey big mama". Pissed me off but I moved on from it and simply said hi. I started going to the gym about 3 weeks ago and changed some of my eating habits prior to that and have lost 19 lbs. My response from her " you have more to get off, keep on working on it". Pissed again! Just simply say good job on your weight loss or something encouraging. Its like every time she sees me she has to say something to say about my weight. "You are getting broad across your back, loose some weight" or "you are jiggly" always something. Those of you who think talking to her and telling her how i feel will help, it doesn't. The best part is...DRUMROLL!!!! She is fat herself. She pisses me off sometimes and it does not stop. I snapped on someone the other week and my hubby said I need to be like that all the time. LOL! if only it worked. Just needed to vent! Thanks everyone Wow, your aunt sounds *exactly* like my grandmother... and I *hate* it. There are times when I just want to tell her to shut her trap or to follow her own "advice" but she's my grandmother and I think it would give her a heart attack if her generally quiet, easy going, oldest granddaughter told her to shove it where the sun don't shine lol. I distinctly remember one time when I was still in middle school. I found a pair of jeans that were a 14 and looked really great on me. I was happy. She said "well next time lets aim for a twelve"... UGH. And I didn't realize until I was older how horribly wrong that was for her to say. I think there are just some people who need to learn to use their inner filters. I have no problem with people who speak their mind but there is a line between voicing your opinion and just being rude. Thanks for sharing! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sleeveme2011 0 Posted April 30, 2011 I feel sorry for her. It's the whole bullying concept...she has to put you down to make herself feel better. Poor thing... Clearly the gym isn't working for her! I'm the type that gives back what I get and I don't care who it's from. We're all human beings so either you treat me with respect or you won't get it in return. You're owning your situation, taking charge, and doing something about it and should be really proud of yourself. Thank you so much. I am proud of myself and I am so ready to have this surgery. :-) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sleeveme2011 0 Posted April 30, 2011 Or something like- I thought you had a gym membership- why would you spend the money if you aren't going to use it- I know your butt wouldn't be getting that big if you were going. LOL! Love it! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sleeveme2011 0 Posted April 30, 2011 I can relate, my grandmother did this to me constantly while I was growing up and made me feel like I was morbidly obese, (turns out I was a size 11 back then). I wish I had known then that I wasn't really that big, she wore a size 18 herself. It wasn't until after she died and i started looking at pictures of her when she was younger that I realized she was (in her dreadfully misguided way) trying to tell me to watch it and not end up like her, for some reason she thought this would work!! Looking at those old pictures I see we are built the same way and she must have recognized herself in my varying stages of weight gain through puberty, early adulthood. I don't know if this is the situation with your aunt, but I wish I had known not to let it bother me. All you can do for now is ignore her and watch her freak out when you start really losing!!! I'm sorry your grandma went about it the way she did. I cant wait to start losing, for so many reasons. I already know when she finds out I had surgery she will freak out but she will get over it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sleeveme2011 0 Posted April 30, 2011 Wow, your aunt sounds *exactly* like my grandmother... and I *hate* it. There are times when I just want to tell her to shut her trap or to follow her own "advice" but she's my grandmother and I think it would give her a heart attack if her generally quiet, easy going, oldest granddaughter told her to shove it where the sun don't shine lol. I distinctly remember one time when I was still in middle school. I found a pair of jeans that were a 14 and looked really great on me. I was happy. She said "well next time lets aim for a twelve"... UGH. And I didn't realize until I was older how horribly wrong that was for her to say. I think there are just some people who need to learn to use their inner filters. I have no problem with people who speak their mind but there is a line between voicing your opinion and just being rude. Thanks for sharing! An inner filter would be great. She has never had one of those. She has always been this way for as long as I can remember. Hearing from others that grew up with her, she is more "tamed" now. LOL! I am wondering what I will be picked on after the weight is gone?? I mean I will not be the "fat" kid anymore and what not. LOL. Family Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Disney 20 Posted April 30, 2011 I am overweight. I have been overweight almost my entire life. I am so sick and tired of being called names and being told what I "need" to do. :angry:NEWSFLASH***** I know I am fat. I have mirrors in my home and I look in them every single day. I dont need you telling me something I already know. WELL today my aunt came over to my moms house. First thing she says "hey big mama". Pissed me off but I moved on from it and simply said hi. I started going to the gym about 3 weeks ago and changed some of my eating habits prior to that and have lost 19 lbs. My response from her " you have more to get off, keep on working on it". Pissed again! Just simply say good job on your weight loss or something encouraging. Its like every time she sees me she has to say something to say about my weight. "You are getting broad across your back, loose some weight" or "you are jiggly" always something. Those of you who think talking to her and telling her how i feel will help, it doesn't. The best part is...DRUMROLL!!!! She is fat herself. She pisses me off sometimes and it does not stop. I snapped on someone the other week and my hubby said I need to be like that all the time. LOL! if only it worked. Just needed to vent! Thanks everyone People like your Aunt have to criticize others to make themselves feel better. Here's the worst part, when you lose all your weight and you are looking FAN-TASTIC, guess what? She is STILL going to find something to criticize, maybe you're having a bad hair day. Maybe your shirt has a few wrinkles, SOMETHING. You should make up your mind now that whatever she says in the future, is just her feeling bad about herself and reflecting it onto you, and don't take it personally. You will do great! I wish you luck Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1-4-Many 2 Posted April 30, 2011 I'm never fast on my feet but it's too bad you wouldn't have said "you know, I've lost 19 pounds. I'm surprised you didn't notice since you seem to be the on who found it". Maybe save that for later when you're really dropping like a rock. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites