Family Frustrations

[Raine 170]

So I made the decison last year, then changed jobs and insurance plans, same company, Aetna, then hated the new job worse than anything I have ever hated in my life! Then went back to my old company 5 months later and switched back to the old insurance in January which didnt take effect until March 1st. Ok, so at this point I thought I was going to have to jump through all the hoops and climb over all the walls all over again, then at the beginning of April my Dr.'s office called and said I was approved, that same day I got the letter from my insurance company and was floored. No, I mean litterally, if the bench wasn't right next to me outside I would have hit the floor. So, I told my family and hubby and son were totally on my side and supportive. Told my sisters and most were there for me except my sister who is getting married on June 10 and her first thought was can you wait until after my wedding? I told her it would up to my PCP and my Nephrologist. If they say no then I wait. I think she was hoping for that, or at least I felt like that. Both docs gave me the go ahead and when I went to tell her, well to say the least she was like, you really can't wait?? What about the dinners? what about your dress.... I got pissed and brushed her off basically. I am doing what is best for my health not her wedding. I'll still be there but c'mon. Be a little excited for me. Ok vent over. I am still totally excited and happy that I am doing this and cant wait!!

[meggiep 57]

Are you close to your sister? I don't want to make light of your passion for getting the surgery, but I do understand why your sister is feeling that way since her wedding is a really big deal for her. Where will you be in the timeline of recovery on June 10th?

Maybe there is a way you can reassure your sister that you wont let anything dissipate your enthusiasm and participation in her wedding. Remind her you don't need to eat to celebrate!

Howeverm if you will have surgery so close to the date that you might not be returned to your fully energy , etc. then I hate to say it but maybe you should think about having the surgery the Monday after her wedding. It isn't that long...really.... and this could mean a lot to her.

I'm a wedding photographer ;-P so pretty sensitive to what this means to people....

[Raine 170]

We are close, I'll be sleeved for 5-6 weeks by then and should be fine, I explained that to her. I know its a big deal for her and her partner and I will be there with bells on. I just wanted her to be happy for me too. So guess I was feeling sorry for myself. I'm not going to wait. We both have things in our life that are important for different reasons. Ah well life goes on, or rather at least now it will because I am doing what I know will help my life go on. I'll call her again tomorrow and reasure her again. Thanks, Meggie, I do see her side, I just want her to be happy for me too.

[samantha209 19]

oh yeah 5-6 weeks u should be fine!

i have a similar situation...i am a bridesmaid in y friend's wedding in November...everyone went to pick dresses the weekend before i got sleeved. However there is NO WAY i can pick a dress now. She is very understanding though....i will be going in September a little closer to the wedding and hopefully requiring less alterations. She wants me in the wedding so much so, she is willing to let me wear a different dress if need be.

[Rev Me Up! 75]

Don't worry about the wedding - at 6 weeks out, you will have lost weight, but probably not a whole dress size. You can pick something out in your current size and have it altered 2 weeks before the event. As far as dinners - you can still go to dinner!!! You will be able to eat whatever they give you, but you will only eat about 4 bites of it. There will be so much going on, no one will notice. I don't see any reason why you couldn't participate in the event. By 5-6 weeks out, you will be very aware of your limits and it shouldn't affect your day.

Reassure her that you will be there for her and that you will be healed enough to give her support on that important day.

Make sure you find a good tailor!!!

Lara

[LisaM 3]

Heck, if your Bridesmaid dress is loose at the wedding, put safteypins inside on the hems. Tell your sister not to be a bridezilla, everything is going to be fine. Plus her wedding pictures will look nicer with a skinnier you in them!