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why am I not happy? POST SLEEVERS HELP



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So I had surgery Sept 9th, 2010, couldnt wait to have it and I'm so happy I did... Today I'm only 34 lbs away from goal, WOW writing that I STILL cannot believe I'm that close. My problem is that I dont see that in the mirror, meaning, I still see the fat me. I used to be a size 20-22W, today I went to Kohls and couldnt believe I am now a comfy size 10! SIZE 10!! that is AMAZING I know, never in my wildest dreams......but I just dont see it in the mirror, what I see is the size 20 me, even when I shop, I go right to the plus size dept. Is this normal? Thanks for your input!!

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I think it is perfectly normal, becuz I do it too. Sometimes went I go shopping and I looking at the misses or junior section I keep expecting someone to say WHY are you shopping HERE. These clothes are to small for you.

I remember recently I went to Sears and immediately went to the plus size dept and as I am browsing a sales clerk comes running over to me to tell me about the great sales they are having. I thanked her and turn around to continue shopping. She then says to me am I shopping for myself or for someone else, I replied for myself. Then she says Oh you are in the wrong dept. this is the plus size dept. I was floored becuz even tho I am now wearing a size 12 jeans sometimes I don't see it too.

Also have you notice peeps who you knew before, that are overweight seem........ HUGE?:(

Deb B)

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Perfectly normal. Even when I was dropping down in the size 4-6 range, I was still reaching for 8s and 10s. I can't remember when it finally "clicked", but it was definitely way after I hit goal, and my weight had stabilized.

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Congratulations on your weight loss and having so little weight left to reach goal!

I think you are happy yet do not see yourself as thin yet...yes I said it, the THIN you. Okay, I admit I still grab the wrong sizes too and like Dansha have even been in the plus size clothing browsing until I take one out and hold it up against me and then that moment of "wait, I need to be somewhere else" happens. Casually I stroll over the the "normal" section. I pull out the size I am now 4 or 6 and think, I am gonna bust this zipper or flash back to those moments of barely sqeezing into a size 18 uncomfortably with the end of the day red marks across my waist from wearing too tight pants.So, agreed, this is normal.

We were all overwieght for so long, new habits take a while to become pattern in daily lives. Right?

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I am going through the exact same thing. I am down almost 50 lbs (sleeved Nov 29th) and about 35lbs from my goal. I have gone from a size 20 to a size 12, but still feel like a size 20. I still look in the mirror and feel fat. I even had my husband take some pictures of me the other day so I could maybe see what other people were seeing, and I all I saw was how fat I was. I think it is a very difficult transition and our brains have a hard time catching up. I am hoping mine does because it isn't healthy to keep feeling that way even though we are not fat anymore!

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this is really intereseting for me as I am ver good at being harsh on myself!

I am on the same page... nearly 60lb gone and I still see a very large body and a thinner face: I am equally as hard on myself now as I was this time last year.

I do get good days, when I 'feel' good and I relish those moments. I am hoping with time, this will be more common and the 'darker' moments will be less.

I also wonder if it depends on how long we've been overweight/obese/large etc... or whatever you want to call it... for me it has been a very long time and I think that my head is going to need time to get to grips with how I am changing and hopefully will continue to change....

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I read an article on this awhile ago. It said that it does take time for us to accept our new sizes. It said it was very important to actually do mental exercises of looking at yourself and really talking to yourself about how your body has changed! The article said this will help you to accept your bodily changes. If you don't, the article said, it is one of the major subconscious ways that we sabotage our successes! It said to continually think about how you are changing, remind yourself again and again what new size you are. It talks about all kinds of changes that we go through- marital, job promotion, loss of a loved one, but the hardest change to accept was seeing your body in a different size, whether you had a gain or a loss.

I think it makes a lot of sense. It is hard to get used to. I'm not there yet but I hope to be!

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I think my main focus is always my pictures. I can pick myself apart like no other!

I did notice though I was at Kohl's the other day and I had to analyze (I'm an Analyst by day... lol) what I was doing. I picked out some cute capris that were on sale. I chose sizes from 10's going all the way up to 16's!! I don't know why I did that. I know I'm not a 16 anymore... *sigh* I just didn't want to be disappointed if what I brought into the fitting room were all too small.

Well I did at least start from the smallest I had. The 10's didn't buckle but I was a bit shocked that I could even get them on that much. I don't know why because I do have a pair of 10's at home that I can get on (not comfortably though!) So I tried on the 12's and of course they fit perfectly. I was even more shocked at this. I just find it hard for me to imagine fitting 12's where not only 7 months ago I was wearing 22/24's!! I didn't even need to think about trying on the 14's or 16's.

Then I decided to go look for some new tops. Funny, I felt weird about doing this but for the first time in 20 years I ventured over into the Junior section. Their tops are always way more stylish/cute than the Misses. I find Misses to carry some cute stuff but a lot of it just look like Women's size clothes to me - and I'm so over that!!! LOL

I felt weird in that section though. I kept wondering if people were looking at me like "what's that fat girl doing over here?" I would scan a little bit just to see, and no one was even paying any attention to me what so ever. So yeah, my brain still needs to catch up.

Here's one other thing I've noticed. I'll sometimes glance at the Women's clothing and be amazed at how humongous they look to me now! Like sheets of clothing! I always feel sad to knowing I used to buy those sizes, then instantly happy again that I don't... LOL

I can totally relate too with Deb that seeing other large folks out in the world now, and how I perceive them. They all really do look very large, much larger now than when I was large too. If that makes any sense at all...

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It's perfectly normal. At this point you've probably spent more time being heavy that you have thinner. Of course it's going to take time to get used to it!

Just be patient!

Congratulations on your success!!

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thanks guys, as always, your input has helped me..

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